They Didn’t Think They Were Good Enough...Until They Did This | Ed Mylett

Key Takeaway

When facing seemingly impossible odds, focus on finding the one person who believes in possibility rather than dwelling on those who doubt you. A hospital nurse's simple willingness to 'try' helped someone walk again after a 2% chance of survival. The lesson: sometimes you're just not asking the right person. Your breakthrough might come from changing who you're listening to, not changing your circumstances.

Episode Overview

This powerful episode features two inspiring comeback stories. First, Michael Chandler, a UFC fighter, discusses overcoming imposter syndrome, the importance of mental preparation alongside physical training, and how his faith and personal development work enabled him to fight Conor McGregor after a difficult losing streak. The second segment features an extraordinary story of a professional horse trainer who broke her neck (C2 vertebra, same injury as Christopher Reeve) with a 2% chance of survival, yet walked out of the hospital in days and returned to competitive riding within a year. Both stories emphasize the power of persistence, finding the right support, and making your future vision brighter than your past.

Full Transcript

Transcript of They Didn’t Think They Were Good Enough...Until They Did This | Ed Mylett from The Ed Mylett Show. Auto-generated from episode audio; may contain minor errors.

Hey everyone, welcome to my weekend special. I hope you enjoy the show. Hit that like button and be sure to subscribe to the YouTube channel so you never miss my show, whether it's Tuesday, Thursday, or Saturday. Here's our first guest. Is there a part of you that has imposttor syndrome? If you're being candid with the audience, that you do come from humble beginnings. You have had ups and downs. You are uh you know coming off of you know you haven't had a sixight win streak even right now if we're being candid, right?

So, is there a part of you that has to overcome these mental mental mental demons, so to speak, of believing you belong, believing you can win that I think most people struggle with, or have you passed that stage of your life? I think I definitely still have a a a certain degree of it, but I think I think I've gotten to the point where it's been revealed to me enough through through life, the course of life that the older you get, the more people you come into contact with, the more the more people you train with or you're in business with or you watch their work ethic or you watch how they live their lives, both in front of the camera, behind closed doors, behind the camera, behind closed doors, in front of, you know, in front of the public and you start to really look around and take stock and think, you know what, I do think that the golden diamonds was was was reserved for God's people, not the devil's bunch.

You know, I do think that the good among us are supposed to go out and capture those things. And before it used to be like, yeah, but you don't deserve it. You don't, you know, you don't deserve that. And if you do get that, well, what's gonna happen? Maybe maybe you're gonna start rubbing people the wrong way. And I think I've gotten over that and realized, man, if you don't have a bunch of fruit on the back of your cart, you can't pass it out to people.

If you've got nothing on your cart, you can't pass it out to people. And I do think I have I have a duty to be successful because I can then use it to change people's lives where until I got to a certain point, it was like, well, I'm a little bit afraid. You, you actually were the first person I heard you talk about the thermometer, right? And I was that guy. Like I'm okay with the thermometer getting to here, but I'm a little nervous if it gets too high.

And that that thermometer just keeps getting higher and higher and higher, and I'm getting okay with it each time. So, I do think I have a little bit of a degree of that as you know, once again, you you keep leveling up. Every time you level up, now you're into a new realm. So, of course, there's a little bit of it, but you say, "Wait a second. I've been here before. Let me watch how this plays out." And at the end of the day, when I lay my head on the pillow at night, I know that I deserve it.

I'm the one of those guys who deserves to to go and capture that because of the way that I live my life. That's exactly right. You've earned this. And by the way, everyone, a little bit of everything in moderation is actually good. So, a little bit of imposttor syndrome keeps you what you see in this young man right here. Humble, keeps you training hard, reminds you, I better outwork this dude because maybe I don't have everything they have. A lot of imposttor syndrome will cause your thermometer to turn the air conditioner on and you'll cool your life back down.

So, a little bit of it is not You don't have to eradicate all of your imposttor syndrome. You have to eradicate that it's your dominant thought. But to have that in the back, a little bit is not all that bad. I have it, which is what causes me to prepare for a speech or a podcast. It's what's caused me to save my money because I don't believe all my press clippings. I don't believe I'm always going to win. Everything's entitled to me. And so, it's a healthy thing to some extent.

Let me ask you this. I was uh watching some fights, you know, preparing for, you know, our work and and my son's like, "Dad, these guys are so good." And, you know, I've I've hit bags and spar and you you know, all that part of my background. And I said, "Max, the different thing that you don't realize, cuz it looks like a video game when you watch people fight, is they're getting hit and still throwing punches back at the same time." That's the one thing I think when people watch any sort of combat, whether it's Mikey Sport in boxing or yours, they just underestimate how difficult it is to absorb punishment and return it.

It's one thing to just dole out punishment into a bag, right? Or to, you know, to hit mits. It's a very different thing. And that's really I told my son, I said, "Max, that's the the game of life. The game of life is everything looks good at the seminar. When you read the book or listen to the podcast, it's sort of like these offensive strategies. But the people that I've seen win, and I want you to talk about this in fighting it in your life. The people that I've seen win, they have this very special ability to absorb a punch and still throw back.

And that's the separator in life, and it certainly is in sports as well. So, just speak to that, Michael. I mean, metaphorically, you do it in there. And by the way, you may want to be the greatest at all time at doing that. This is a dude who almost out on his feet can still knock people out better than anybody that's ever probably been in the sport or at least one of them. But what about that fact of life and actually in the sport literally? Yeah.

Yeah, I mean it's it's very interesting because I do think metaphorically, right, there's there's a lot of similar similarities there, but even realistically, I think from a physical standpoint, I think sometimes it's it's easier to take the blows inside of taking huge shots inside of a fight and keep coming forward where because there's not as much of an ego involved because I'm not really worried about what how everybody perceives the punch that just land on me, landed on me. Whereas in life, in business, in our relationships, we have a failed account or a failed relationship or we have we have a setback here.

Immediately, everybody stops and thinks, looks in the mirror and says, "What's everybody else thinking around me?" You know, whereas in mixed martial arts, I don't have the time, and I call it a luxury. I think I don't I have the luxury of not having any time. If I sit and I dwell on that one punch that just landed and it and it rocked me and I start thinking about what the people in the nosebleleeds or in the front row are thinking about that shot that just landed, the second, the third, the fourth are going to come and that the knockout is going to ensue.

Whereas in life a lot of times we are stifled and stymied so much by we take one blow, we take one shot, we take one setback and we're just worried about everything else with instead of just you know the definition of persistence is continuing in a course of action with complete disregard to previous failures and future opposition. Right? So in life we stop and we think way too much about what's everybody else thinking or how is this going to look on social media? What are the what are the press clippings going to say?

like you said, like there's so much to it and I've gotten really good at and this happened to me when I came to the UFC. Like you said, I was outside the UFC, relative obscurity. I trained hard. I was a good athlete, but I wasn't a famous athlete. Then all of a sudden, you come over, you're the biggest free agent signing maybe in UFC history. And you everything doubles and five five times the following and five times the interviews and five times the platform. and all of a sudden you're like, "Wait a second.

I better get used to public criticism very quickly or else I'm going to I'm this thing this ship's going to sink." Um, so I've just gotten really good at realizing, man, no matter what, this is my race that I'm running. And I love you, but it's still my race. And I love my wife, my kids, and I love my coaches, but this is still my race. And if I can just focus on me and know know that if I just keep moving forward and if anything we don't follow people because of their successes.

We follow people more even for their failures because they were able to overcome something. People love us people love a comeback. And that's what my story my whole story has been about. I am a blueprint for how you get knocked down, get back up and keep moving forward and then somehow end up in the biggest fight of the last decade. By the way, he's also um has a future in my space uh in the personal development, motivational coaching space as you could tell because he's got this insane ability to articulate his thoughts.

Okay, couple more things. Um separations in the preparation. I don't know if there's a more finely trained athlete on the planet than you right now. I mean, in any sport, this dude's a specimen. He trains his ass off. off. off. um do you like to train or do you do it because you know it produces a result and how important in anything someone's doing particularly if maybe they think they lack something is to gain their confidence from the prep from the preparation. I think um I think I love I do love to do it because you ever ask yourself like what's the alternative?

You know, what is the alternative? I do think I use the word easy lightly because I'm sure the audience is like dude I watch the training it looks crazy but for me it's easy. My hard is different than your hard and different than hard for everyone else. me thinking about doing some of the things that you do, that sounds crazy to me. But to me, maybe working out as hard as I do, half the audience is like, man, I would die in the in the warm-up.

But it's become not easy in the sense that it's not hard every time I do it. But it's what I do. It's not who I be, but it is what I do, and I'm pretty darn good at it. And I do know that it produces results. And I do think, you know, going back to the imposter syndrome, going back to the the self-sabotage and going back to the temperature gauge, going back to my self-concept or my lowly self-concept that I used to have, if back when I was 14 years old, I didn't get into hand-tohand combat thinking, okay, I'm not that talented, so I have to outwork everybody.

And I've been able to take that now for the last 28 years, and I've never ever lost it. And I've won world titles. I fought for the world title in the UFC. I have fought Madison Square Garden twice, fight of the year, debut of the year. I've got all of these different accolades, different accolades, different accolades, but still the cornerstone always is me remembering that little 14-year-old boy who walked into Northwest High School and and and knew that I was I had just started wrestling and everybody else had been there for years and I need to outwork all these people or I'm never going to get to where I'm going.

And I still have that as a 38-year-old in the sport. 20 28 years in the sport. Um, so I look at it like I am grateful that I have these two capable arms and these two capable legs to be able to do what I do, you know, and I, you know, I look at it as a blessing that I, you know, I train here in Deerfield Beach, Florida, and there's two gyms connected to each other and there's a physical therapy, there is a physical therapy, um, clinic in our same entrance.

We share one and I see people coming in in wheelchairs. I see people coming in with cerebopaly and I see people coming in with really bad injuries, car accidents, paralysis, all these different things. And I know it sounds a little bit dark to think about, right? But right? But right? But I am so blessed to be able to do what I what I get to do. And every single one of those people would would give anything to trade one week of this well- enabled body to be able to live in this well- enabled body.

And I I really always have looked at that blessing that most people are have they can talk about depression or they can talk about anxiety and sadness and all of these different things, but we have so many things to be thankful for that we just gloss over and overlook and just keep moving forward. And I think that's where it is knowing I can outwork everybody. Taking my gratefulness and my gratitude for the abilities that I have and the opportunity that I have and thinking about the alternative.

The alternative is me going and getting a job somewhere. And I love what I do and I get to do it every single day. It's my producers, I guarantee you, are just their mouths are open right now because right before you got here, I recorded a podcast. It'll come out after this one, but I talked about focusing on what you possess as opposed to what you don't have. And then having perspective questions about the fact that someone's got it worse than you. And when you're actually able to do those two things and focus on what you have as opposed to what you're missing and focus on the fact that you're blessed to have what you do have that someone's got it worse.

It's just amazing. Then you go say this. How much is your two last questions? How much is your growth on you? Like most people can tell from listening to you now, but I want everyone to know this man works very hard on himself. Like Michael in his downtime um I'm not his only friend in this space. Michael will attend events. He's read the books. He listens to the podcast. He um he'll speak at these events as well. He's worked very hard on the internal him and and there's two elements of that.

He's a man of very strong faith, but he's also worked on his mind, worked on his thinking, worked on himself, worked on that thermostat setting. How much of that aside from all the physical training do you attribute to the fact that you're going to be in the octagon on the 29th with McGregor? I think it's got I mean, it has everything to do with it. I mean really and and I made this, you know, I made this realization years ago when you were talking about, you know, if for the people that don't know, I went 688 days without winning a fight.

And for a lot of people, that's a that's a death sentence for an MMA career. You know, going from world champion in Bellator to losing three fights in a row thinking that at any point in time I was going to get my walking papers or get a get a phone call that I was going to get cut from the organization. And in that time, I realized I was doing all the physical work. If you're my coach and you tell me to run through that wall, I will run through that wall, no questions asked.

And I will do it harder and faster and better than every single else behind me. But what I wasn't working on was my mind. And what I wasn't working on is this self-image. And I was letting that get away from me. All I was doing was building up a a bigger, faster, stronger, subpar version of the man that I was really created to be. Because inside of here, inside of my mind was so it was lacking and it was so important, but it needed to be revealed to me.

And that was the thing too. If a bad thing happens to you, but a good thing comes from it and you become a better person, a better man, a better father, a better husband, a better a better human being, you got to ask yourself, was it really a bad thing if a good thing comes from it? And I think I look at that point in my career and realize that was the catalyst and the the springboard that was going to catapult me. That was the winding of the spring.

And it was a painful winding of the spring. It was it came with tears. It came with self-doubt. It came with embarrassment. overwhelming embarrassment, but it was that quilling of that spring that eventually springboarded me to becoming the next version of the man that I needed to be. Um, and yeah, I mean, I just I've always been I've always just been curious and uh admired people like yourself who who who are trying to make the world a better place, admitting their flaws, showing and wearing their heart on their sleeve and talking about the struggles that you have gone through and how there's a lesson in every single loss.

And you know, I've been very blessed with so many great friends. And I have a duty to them to continue to be a part of that community. I have and I have a duty to my family and I have a duty to myself. And most importantly, I have a duty to my almighty God who created me not just to be good, not just to be that little boy who was going to play it small and and think that he doesn't deserve great things and think that I could just, you know, barely get enough and barely get by and live paycheck to paycheck and nobody knows my name.

I I've I was commissioned and and I have this conviction, this deep conviction to know that I was created to do something extraordinary and it took years and years and years and I just want to keep on adding to that. And when people say the sky is the limit, you know, it's it's a it's a term that we use, but at some point you start to believe it and you and you believe it not because of the Bentleys and the Bugattis and the boats and the watches and the all the material things, but it's the things that pe that you make people feel just with your presence and with your with your words and your voice.

And that's what I want to be able to do. And now we got the biggest the biggest platform we ever could have asked for. And uh the sky is the limit. So guys, now here we go. Just so you know, if you're driving the car, you need to grip your steering wheel a little bit tighter because this is about to get really good, like really hugely inspiring. If you're on the treadmill at the gym, you're about to go from level seven to level 10. Like that.

And if you're watching YouTube, this is the part where you bring your kids in the room and you say, "Watch this." Okay? So So tell them what happens. You've you're starting to make your comeback. Guys, this is one of the most amazing stories you're going to hear. So, you're making your comeback and what happens? Well, I'd like to tell you my mantra of it's going to get rocky and I'm going to tell you the mantra that my dad told me the whole time throughout my entire career and me being very risky was whatever you do, don't end up in a hospital because you'll die in there.

Wow. And you know, it just kind of rang in my head because I was riding dangerous horses and I was doing a lot of training and then I started training around the clock because of the weather and I needed my bills paid and I'm riding riding riding and um taking chances that I shouldn't have had to take, you know, just because I was not understanding my growth and I wasn't understanding my contribution. And so I was training really late at night in August in 2009 and I'm riding this horse that's fine.

Everything's fine. We're training. Everything's normal. Um, my poor staff member was there with her boyfriend and it was just us lonely at night, lights on in the arena and and I'm going to train this horse and as I was taking off around the arena, um, this horse slipped kind of in a mud puddle and it was not a big deal, you know, whatever. He slips and he was feeling frisky and you kind of know that when a horse behaves a certain way, he's feeling a little frisky.

I should have known better. I should have taken more precautions, but I didn't. It's what I do for a living. What's the big deal? And I start laughing. I start giggling. And this horse starts to buck. And when I say buck, you know, horses can play and buck and they can crow hop and buck. This horse did something that's like a wild instinct. So he reared up. When he did, he broke all the bones on this side of my face. And when he came down to the ground, I'm still laughing.

I'm like, okay, whatever. And you know, in the cowboy industry, it's you got to be tough, you know. And so I start to pull this horse up. And as I do, um, he hits me in the head again and I skull fracture in four places. Of course, I don't know this. And of course, I'm not wearing a helmet because that's just not the cool tough thing to do. Oh my god. And he begins to buck a little bit more. And I just decide that I'm going to pick a place off over here to jump off.

Um, which is a terrible idea. But I picked a place to kind of jump off. And when I did, he kicked my feet about 13 or 14 feet in the air. And I landed straight down on my head. and my legs just kind of flopped over and I was unable to move. I was paralyzed right in that moment and moment and moment and what a tough place to be in, you know, because I was in this horrible relationship and relationship and relationship and in a spot where I'm like, who's going to save me, save me, save me, you know?

So, all I have is my career. If I get hurt, I can't make a living. How am I going to take care of myself? I'm in this horrible place. How am I going to get up? I got to get up. And so my friend came over. I was strapped down to a picnic table because I was too cheap to ride in an ambulance. So I get taken in a pickup truck on a on a in a pickup truck on a picnic table to the hospital. And I get there and I start joking with the the staff because it's just my way.

And the lady in the front desk, um, my friend went in and asked for a gurnie. And she said, "You don't need a gurnie. that girl's out there telling jokes. Quit being so dramatic. So, my friend that was a a paramedic, they take me in and they finally get me a gurnie. I could have walked, I think. could have I could have walked, I think. I think I could have. But when I got through the MRI machine and and joking with the um the doctor that was helping me, I kept telling him, you know, Hooters closes in 15 minutes and we're really close now.

Like, let's go get some food. some food. some food. Tell me I have a concussion. Let's get out of here. And he came back in the room. And we said, "You have a 2% chance to live." Oh my god. And he said, "It's really been touching to get to know you." But he said, "The plane's running and you have 13-minute flight to think about your life. And I hope that you really take that time to think about what you're going to do now because you're never going to ride horses again." horses again." horses again." Wow.

Wow. Wow. And And And I'll never forget getting I'll never I don't know why I remember the guy's names. There were two guys named Russell that carried me to the plane and had me on this, you know, in the sea collar and strapped to the table. And I get to Can someone get me some tissue, please? Someone grab one. Thank you. Um, I get to the hospital room and there's a whole another story um in the hospital, but I was told again I have a 2% chance to live, that I would never walk again.

The neurosurgeon told me I was an absolute idiot for riding horses. Thank you. They don't stop. They come down and it's over. It's beautiful. It's beautiful. It's beautiful. So, So, So, I had I had a second to think and all I could think of was my dad telling me, you know, you're going to die in a hospital. You can't don't die in a hospital. And I'm like, it's this crazy superstition that you're going to die in the hospital. And I wake up the next day heavily drugged, obviously, with a halo on.

Wow. Wow. Wow. I had a girlfriend in the hospital tell me they're going to offer you two scenarios. You can get the surgery with the box in your neck or you can get the halo. They're going to shave your head. You're going to have holes in your head. She said, "Go that way. I've seen this go a bunch of different ways." So, when the doctor came in, I started balling and I was like, I want the halo. You know, all I can think of is this cage on my head.

I want the halo. At this point, I've called my mom and dad and told them that I was in a fender bender. Oh my god. Because they're with their grandkids in California. And I'm like, I'm in a fender bender. Everything's fine. It's all fine. It's going to be fine. Amazing. and I've got to figure out a way to get out of this hospital. So, I get these nurses that come in and I say, "Hey, how can I get out of here?" Because now I've got this real embedded childhood fear that I'm going to die in a hospital and I've got a damn good chance at this point with the situation I'm in.

I'm in. I'm in. True. True. True. I could die in here. So, um, shout out to all the amazing medical professionals because it's just my own superstition. They did an amazing job. job. job. One came in. I said, "I need to get out of here." and she laughed at me and she said,"Well, you know, when you can walk from one end of the hall to the other, then they'll let you out." Um, but you're not going to do that. Um, you got a long time. You need to settle in.

You've got about 6 months you're going to be here. So, the next nurse came in and she said, she laughed at me and she goes, you know, she's writing. Well, you've got six months. You know, you just like settle in. And then the next lady came in really late on shift and she was amazing and if I could find her, I would give her everything I've got. M she came in and I said, "How do I get out of here? I I got to get out of here.

Like, I really got to get out of here." And she said, "Well, you walk to the end of hall and you come back, you can get out." And I said, "Well, let's do that. How do we do that?" She said, "Well, you you got to get up." And the the big risk is, you know, if and when you fall down, you know, you can wiggle your fingers and toes, and that's good, but when you get up, it's not going to feel like you thought it was, and you got all this equipment on your head.

you're going to hit the ground and then you could die. And I was like, well, they've given me terrible odds at this point. So, what the hell? the hell? the hell? And it was just very cool this lady that moment I she has no idea what she did for me because she's just like just well, you know, I'm willing to try it. So, she takes the belt and she ties it to the ceiling and I get up and I fall down just like she said I would.

And then she said, "If you just put one foot in front of the other, you know, you can get down to the end of the hall and it could take you months, but we're going to try it." Wow. It took me about an hour and a half and um I got up and down the end of the hall hall hall and I took all the people that that didn't believe me, you know, the lady at the front desk and the nurses that came in and I said, "Tomorrow I'm going to deliver flowers to each and every one of you guys because you didn't believe and maybe I can change your mind because other people are going to come in here." Oh my gosh.

And they need to know they can walk. And so the next day I gathered up all my strength. Mom at this point knows that I've had I've been structurally destroyed is what I was told. She got called from actually a newspaper outlet that was interviewing for um rodeo publication that had leaked my medical records. So my parents found out in that way. So now I've got to do damage control and learn to walk. And I told mom, I said, "We got to go to the florist." I made them a promise.

And so it was a really cool scene to watch all of these people that just didn't believe instead of me being angry at these people that didn't believe in my journey to just shine a light on it and show them a different way. So I went and got floral arrangements for every single person that told me I couldn't do it. And I walked in there and I walked to each of their offices and I I I think hopefully I gave them a gift that they can always have.

Wow. Wow. Wow. That amazing That amazing That amazing that they you may not believe how I'm going to do it. Um, but it gave me a lot of clarity, too. Wow. Wow. Wow. Sometimes you're just not asking the right person. right person. right person. Wow. Wow. Wow. You know, You know, You know, I Wow. I Wow. I Wow. I think uh I think everybody should just literally go back and listen to all of this again. this again. this again. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. You make this honestly, I'm going to tell you something.

This is like such a blessing to be here with you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. It's a blessing to be here with you. Thank you. I'm I'm really moved right now and I'm trying to not get too moved so that I can still ask you questions. But But But it has a happy ending. I know. It's such a happy ending. But it's a I know we're going to go to there, but it's a happy ending because of everything you just said that there's there's so many things in there that we all have these people who don't believe in us and we're scared and and they're scared, too.

They're scared to tell me I can walk down the hall because they know I can't. Wow. Wow. Wow. They're scared, too. And maybe that's true for so many people where you have these people in your life that are close to you that are are maybe pulling you down. Maybe they're just scared for you. Maybe they're scared for them that you're going to leave them, too. Right. Absolutely. And everything that you have. And I I just want to acknowledge you like you're freaking amazing. Like you're amazing.

And um I just now just to be clear with everybody, this break was very serious, very similar to Christopher Ree, right? And I mean, not all that dissimilar injury, correct? injury, correct? injury, correct? It's not. It's the same injury. So, when you break your C2, that's what controls your head going left or right. Um, and you have a very, very, very small chance of of of making it out on the other side. With a lot of neck breaks, this would be the the one that you really don't want, you know, to happen.

Unbelievable. I'm picturing you there. I mean, you tell the story so well. I can actually picture you and I'm so proud of you. I mean, you just you're just remarkable. And um everybody that just heard this, I told them they were going to be moved, but I didn't even know until you told it in front of me how much it would move me. Um it puts in perspective so many things that I think are big obstacles in my life that really aren't. aren't. aren't. And so many things that I think are a really big deal and they're not.

And that is a big deal. You wake up and wiggle your fingers and your toes tomorrow, you're going to be like, "Okay, like, "Okay, like, "Okay, my gosh, my gosh, my gosh, we're all okay." Just amazing. And so now it gets actually more amazing now. So you you go through the process of rebuilding yourself and then you make the crazy decision it would seem to me to actually get back on a horse again, right? So what was that like and what was the first time like if you don't mind sharing that?

sharing that? sharing that? It was horrible and I would love to share it. I was like Ricky Bobby in the race car. race car. race car. I'm killing it. And then and then you look over and people are like, "Yeah, you're doing really great, sweetie. You're walking. This is great." Really? And so I thought, you know, learning to walk again is is pretty big hurdle. It's pretty tough. pretty tough. pretty tough. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And then learning to ride again and and you get over the the path that, okay, I'm going to do this again and the neurosurgeons telling me I shouldn't do this again.

this again. this again. Sure. Sure. Sure. Okay, now I'm going to wear some helmets. helmets. helmets. I'm going to wear a helmet I'm going to wear a helmet and I'm going to actually and I'm going to actually do this thing the right way. And then I started thinking about I wonder if other people have had these things. And I start to read everybody's story and I start to wonder if the human mind can comprehend getting up and walking out of a hospital when you've been told a 2% chance.

Maybe I can go back to 14-year-old me that wanted a world title and let's do this thing and let's actually give it a shot. And I thought if I can have a a goal big enough that makes my future look brighter than my past, then that will keep me hooked towards something that I want so badly. You know, because we're all gonna lose and you're going to suck and you're gonna go broke doing it and you're gonna have people that don't want you to do it and you're gonna fail ultimately and keep getting up and dust off and fail.

But if the thing is so bright that you have to walk toward it, you'll stay hooked. And I stayed hooked. And I had a horse in my front pasture, just a small brief rundown. I had a horse in my front pasture that the trainer told me nobody could ride. And I thought, well, that would be pretty cool. I'm gonna go get that one. that one. that one. Oh my gosh. So, I got that horse that was raised on my place and um I actually her her mom and dad was the horses I went to the national finals on when I was a kid.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I was like, I'm going to I'm going to ride this thing. And I trained her and within a year we were already fighting for another another chance back to the National Finals Rodeo. What? Which is just unheard of. And she's just been been been Is this baby flow? This is baby flow. Okay. So, that was a really cool part of my journey. And then I hit another road bump, just what I think everybody does. Um, I qualified for the National Finals Rodeo in 2013.

And here I am. I'm ready to go and I'm going to show the world. And I go in and I was terrible on TV 10 days in a row. It was just the worst ever. And I thought, well, there went the walking miracle thing. Like now they're just like, she's a walking miracle that doesn't ride very good. Oh my god. Here we go. Okay. It's pretty big walking miracle to be there, but I understand what a let down cuz I've got this career and you know people have known that I've already been and here's my comeback 20 years later or 25 years later or whatever it is and boom and I'm terrible at this on this big platform and and I thought man I've got to do this better.

So So So was that what you were thinking? Stay there. So at the time but were you super depressed, super bummed out for a while? I just want to have people understand what what what the season the season ends September 30th or is it September 31st? Sep se end of September. Okay. October 1st it it begins. begins. begins. So you have a 24-hour span to be really depressed or get it together. together. together. And it was in that moment I was like, "Okay, I've got to do this again.

I got to do this again." And um I want to show my parents what my horse can do. And if I just put that that is my big light at the end of the tunnel. Maybe I put that in front of the world title. Maybe I just scale it back. Okay. Maybe I just do this one thing of just I want to show my face on TV again running my horse as this person with this cool comeback story and I want to make a difference and I want to show that.

Nobody show me stats. Nobody show me numbers. Nobody talk about anything. I qualified back third in the world. The girl that was winning it was a sure thing. thing. thing. Okay. Second place was the sure thing. Third place was the girl that blows it on TV. But let's all feel sorry for her, you know, because the neck thing. So I come back and and I decided that I'm going to put my head down and I don't want to talk about anything but just focusing on one foot in front of the other just like I did before cuz that's been my formula.

Literally like learning to walk literally one foot in front of the other. other. other. So I get on my horse, round one comes. I've never won a round at the National Finals Rodeo at this point. I've made like 50 runs in that arena. Never won. I've placed before breaking your neck. Before breaking my neck, I've done good. Y Y Y my 51st run, I win it. I told all my staff, all my friends, everybody. I said, let's go home. Wrap it up. I don't want to make the other nine runs.

I'm done. Victory. Let's go. Amazing. Yeah. Amazing. Yeah. Amazing. Yeah. So then I thought, well, if we just keep doing this one foot in front of the other thing. Let's just keep doing that. So run by run, the sure thing girl just starts slipping down the pack. Boom, boom, boom. And then here I am. And of course, you know, there's people that love you and hate you in sports. So, I'm getting, you know, people that think I'm ridiculous and people that think that I'm great and, you know, whatever.

It's polarizing. It's fun for the fans. But the sure thing second place girl, she's really a sure thing. And she just starts going and she's doing great. I'm doing great. And I look up to her so much. So, you know, it's cool for us to be kind of in this battle. And um something I've never said before, I think, on any of my social media, is that the 10th round that would determine the champion, she came up to me and she shook my hand and she said, "Well, you've done really great and um I'm just super excited for you." And I thought, "I just won the world title." Because I realized that she hadn't celebrated yet.

And I already had. And in my mind, I had my outfit picked out and I was going to be wearing gold because the gold buckle and I was going to be the gold title holder and I would have this gold and I I knew that when I walked in, I would jump up and down and I would have this um gold buckle in my hand and I was like, "Wow, if I just don't mess this up, this is going to work." work." work." And I went in, she made a beautiful run.

It was great. And they swung the gate open for me to go. And my dad standing right beside me and I was like, "Man, this would be a really bad time to screw this up, wouldn't it? just put one foot in front of the other. Don't try anything fancy. And I think that's been something that I've held with me so long that's so effective. Go in and I made my run and I come out and I look at the board and I'm the winner. And of course, I lose it and I'm losing it.

And the cameras are coming and the, you know, ESPN's here and CBS is here and all of them are coming around and I look at my dad and he was like, "You just, you just won the world." world." world." I was like, "I'm going to go jump on that stage just like I did in my head really quick." Oh my gosh. And it was so cool. And they, you know, whisk me off and here I go down into the bottom and and uh just a funny funny story is the security guard said, "You didn't win it.

They made a mistake. It's someone else." And I was like, "Someone needs to give me a bucket cuz I am for sure going to vomit right now." And they came back and said, "It's amazing. Um we actually give the victory lap to the person that wins the average and you didn't win the average, but you won the world." Wow. Wow. Wow. And it's such a cool thing because in my mind I was shooting for the average. Mhm. Mhm. Mhm. And I wanted to win this, you know, the aggregate.

I wanted to be the most consistent person cuz that's what everybody told me I couldn't be. And I ended up with the world title. So, yeah, you don't always get what you want. Sometimes you get something so much cooler, much cooler, much cooler, so much better. So, it's got to be I mean, listen, first it should be a movie. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I mean, for sure. And all of my producer friends that are watching this, like, hello. I'll have to give you her Instagram in a minute.

It should be a movie. It's an unfreakingbelievable story. like like even hearing it now. Look at me. Like I'm just it's so remarkable what you've achieved and and and still continue to achieve too. But I just got to tell you like just so you know, I've had a just for me like this is such a gift for me. Like I I do shows and I love doing them. But today is a gift for me. Like you're remarkable. You inspire me. The story, the way you tell it.

I can't wait for this to go to your audience and people to see it. I because I know somebody is struggling. Well, of course they are. And like you embody, see some people like I talk about these things. That's great. You embody it. You've lived it. You are it. Like it's you, you're evidence of it. Like you're living proof that the things you teach and talk about are real. Like there's someone right next to me right now who's living proof that you can accomplish anything. That you were washed up in your mind.

You were a has been. It was over. There's so many things I believed about myself that I hear people go, "I'm too old." And I go, "How old are you?" "21." And I'm like, "What is wrong with the world?" Like, "No, you're fine." I don't think anybody at 95 is too old to do something really cool with their life. Do you struggle? Let's go through some things about you. Like, it's hard to move off that, just to be honest with you. Like, um, I'm actually right on the verge right here.

I'm trying to not do what you're doing. So, um, I'm water work, so I can keep us going all day. all day. all day. Well, one of us have to not be, right? It should be my turn, by the way. I should be allowed to um on the inside I certainly am. My audience knows me well enough too. By the way, I I I I must tell you that it's just it's remarkable to me the way that you just articulate it too. It's so beautiful. But um you though, let's talk about you for a minute cuz I think both men can relate to what you're going to talk about here in a minute, too.

But really, women can too. you strike me as I've gotten to know you a little bit that you still do struggle with some of these things whether it be your maybe even which is amazing but even some of your own confidence even to this day. Is that is that true? And and how tell them a little bit about that part of you still and how you navigate through navigate through navigate through confidence is something that I think everyone when you walk into a space you can feel somebody really confident coming out of that space.

And when I help people, whether it be with horses or with anything that I help with, the first thing that I find is that they believe something that's so wildly untrue about themselves and it's so deeply ingrained in themselves that they just they they can't get away from that belief of themsel. And for mine, it was I'm too old to make a comeback or I'm too injured to get to the gym or um you know, I've already accomplished all that I can accomplish anyway. Or for me, it's like, oh well, I always need to have a six-pack and be in perfect professional athletic shape.

And what's so untrue about that is how many people would love to have my body type? How many people would love to be in my position? How many people if dealt my hand could play it so much better? How many people um you know if you just take a look around at people that I'm able to help you know I've helped people that weren't even able to leave their home home home that just needed inspiration to be able to they were you know in such a place with their obesity that they're not able to even stand up.

How do you tell that person that you don't feel great about your body? How do you tell that person that you're not able to take advantage of all the opportunities in your life? There's always somebody in your position. And there's people that I've met with um without limbs that are doing more than I've been able to accomplish. So in your position, what are those things that have tied you to that thought that thought that thought that have kept you from where you're going? It's like the elephant tied to the chair, you know?

Why is it the elephant can just walk away? away? away? Yeah. And and he's get so used to believing he can't. He stays right there. Right. there. Right. there. Right. Let's talk a little boxing. We got to go there. We'll talk some family. Let's talk some boxing. So I'm curious. I'm a big boxing fan. So when you became on my radar radar radar was during the super six tournament. Okay. So that was and they called that the the super middleweight division at the time. Correct. Middleweight 168 pounds.

But basically, I'm paraphrasing, Showtime got together and said, "Let's just find the best one in the world." They put the six of you in this tournament. It ended up being a seventh dude or something. Wasn't Germaine Taylor in it originally or what happened? happened? happened? Well, there were guys that like guys would get knocked out or get injured and then they replace him, but it was the court was always six. So again, you had Kesler, you had Frock or Frock, whatever they call them. There's some there's some dudes in this tournament, right?

And you ended up winning that tournament. I'm curious when it started at that level, was that a new level for you? And like did you have fear? Like did you wonder whether you were the man of those six? How'd that work for you? I had to drop everything. We went got in the car, got back to San Diego, flew to the Bay Area, literally dropped my family off, packed a bag, double ear infection, got on a red eye, went to Germany, and was there the next morning to announce the second leg of the Super Six and was this close to not being a part of it.

That's crazy. And the way they filmed it, everybody, by the way, this was so powerful. All this 24/7 stuff you see now, this is kind of the original of that. And it was so well done. It really changed to some extent how boxing was promoted on either Showtime or HBO to the way they laid it out. But I watched it closely and you weren't the dude they were sort of steering the cameras towards in the beginning and it was really interesting. It was the other guys that I've mentioned before and I remember you won then you won again.

I'm like, "Oh, this dude's got a chance to win this whole tournament." So So even every one of these fights, just curious when you went into it, I just want to know how like a world class person thinks or doesn't think. you're there at that thing in Germany, you see these other five dudes. Are you like, I'm gonna win this tournament or I've always had that belief like my career was my professional career was guided um very meticulously. You know, the powers that be, the networks, the suits, the promoters, like they they want bang for their buck.

They want to make the most money as quickly as possible. And I had opportunities to fight some of the guys that were in the tournament maybe a year or two earlier. And it was for more money than I'd ever seen. and you know great opportunity and you I called Verge like man they're going to give us you know 600,000 and we get to fight on you know HBO and this and that or Showtime and and he said no no he said hold on he said I understand that you know if we say no to this internally there's going to be some blowback but he he said you know when we fight these guys I want you to be a full grown man and and I want you to destroy him like I I don't want you know no I don't want you to be barely winning or barely eating by eating by eating by and we did that like two or three times before the super six happened and we get blowback and some of the blowback spilled publicly where fans are saying, "Oh, you know, Wars, he's a gold medalist, but he's moving too slow." And that's the heat you take.

That's the bullseye you have on your back coming in with a gold medal. But in Germany, I really saw what the intent was. Mhm. Mhm. Mhm. You had Michael Kesler, who was Mikl Kesler at the time. He was like 42 and one or something like that with like I don't know how many knockouts. He had more knockouts than I had fights. You had Carl Froch who was from the UK and you had Arthur Abraham. And then you had the three Americans. Jermaine Taylor who was teetering.

He was still relevant but he was teetering on on on kind of being done. You had the young guy, Andre Derell, and then you had the other young guy and myself. And I could tell that everybody that was there, they just looked at us like we were just a token just to be there. Like these guys will make it interesting. Mhm. Some namesake young guys coming up, but these guys, these are the guys that are supposed to win. And I took exception to that. Took it personal.

I took exception to that. And I got on the phone. I called Ver. I said, "Man, they don't they don't really expect me to win this." He said, "Oh, yeah. I I know." He said, "It's always been like that." He said, "But just watch." Unwavering faith. He's always that pillar. pillar. pillar. And And again, that jumped off on me. It's already confident, but now now it was personal. was personal. was personal. Now it was personal. Your physiology changes so dramatically. You go into your Virgil thing, you deb Kesler and Froch were like rock stars in their various countries, too.

Like they were big names. I don't blame anybody for not picking us. Like I probably wouldn't have picked me. I was a young guy. Yeah, I had the gold medal, but I I hadn't done anything as a as a pro. My biggest win was a guy named Edison Miranda who was a beast. He was a top contender, right? That was my biggest win as a professional. So, I don't blame anybody for not picking me, but I was also going to use that as ammunition. I love this.

I was going to use it. So, he goes on to win that like he wins everything else. This other thing you said through I just want to hear everybody everyone just hear things I hear that I think are important. I do think that there are times in your life where if you don't jump on on an opportunity, you will regret it the rest of your life. That there is timing to when you win. There are moments and you said this a few times where Virgil said this to you and for a lot of you that are chasing what you're chasing.

You may get fatigued with that chase, but there's got to be this part that goes, if I don't jump on this now, this may never come again for me. So, your timing is so critical on winning the Super Six tournament was a huge catalyst. Let's talk some boxing stuff just for me cuz I want to know some stuff. Okay, let's do it. I'm curious. Uh when you I I told you I was going to ask you this and you haven't told me the answer, so I'm curious.

curious. curious. Forget the training part just for a second. We're going to get to that. You are getting wrapped. You're about to go out. Yeah. Okay. For a big fight. You're getting wrapped up. I'm sure Virgil's talking to you. You're going through whatever your game plan was. was. was. What goes through you? Is there honest emotions here as a fighter? See, the thing about boxing to me is that it's different than every other sport. UFC has some of this as well, but the combat sports. This is a man and a man.

I think people forget this. Like even when you bat as a baseball hitter, there's another dude coming up after you. If you ground out, the other dude could get the hit. Right. This is a man and a man. And I'm just curious when you have that happening, you're getting look at your physiology changed again, right? But I'm just curious like when you're getting wrapped at that moment, what's going through you emotionally? What do you what's happening to you at that time? time? time? That moment can break a lot of men.

You can have a great training camp. Uh everything could be clicking. You could have a great fight week leading up to that moment. And that moment as well as the walk to the ring, you can lose it. Like you can lose your confidence. You can let fear overtake you. Um and you can somehow convince yourself that you're not worthy to be there in that moment. moment. moment. Um it's almost like an out-of- body experience. You hear people say, you know, a guy froze or, you know, he didn't he didn't perform or it was a deer in the headlights.

Like that's what they're talking about. Like you have it's almost like a surreal moment. like this this moment that you've been prepping for talking about building up to the world has been talking about like it's here and the fact that it's actually here like it hits you in a in a different kind of way like you're getting wrapped and you have the commission from whatever state you're fighting. They're coming in. They're checking on you. They're giving giving you the countdown. We got 45 minutes. We got 30 minutes.

We got 20. Then they come back in after you get your your uh your gloves back on and they and they say, "We got five minutes. We're walking in two and a half minutes." and they start to count you down like whether you train good or not that's running through your brain. Thinking about my wife and my kids. I'm thinking about the fact that the whole world is literally going to be watching me in just a few moments. I'm thinking about my critics. They got a front row seat.

They got a front row seat. Thinking about my supporters and the people that are are riding with me, getting behind me, they got a front row seat. They're watching. and they're pulling for me. It's like this like this controlled chaos that's going on and it's literally an arena. It's it's a it's a with two gladiators getting ready to literally risk it all. Like boxing is the only sport professional sport that I know of that one loss can change your pay scale. pay scale. pay scale. Like it's in the contract.

If you lose a fight, your minimums can change. if we can renegotiate those minimums. minimums. minimums. Like that's what's going through my head. head. head. Wow. Wow. Wow. And fear is very real. Really? Really? Really? Anxiety is very real. It's very present. And all the guys that say, "I don't get nervous." nervous." nervous." Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I don't I I'm man, they're not being honest. Is that right? Like that's very very present. But that's where my faith I knew. Comes in. And I start to believe beyond myself.

I start to believe beyond the way that I'm feeling. Like we're called to walk by faith and not by sight. We're called to walk by faith and not by feeling. feeling. feeling. So fear is present, but courage is going in the midst of fear. And I've had 32 fights before I retired. I had to do that every single time. It's not like, oh, this is the 25th time I've done this. It's easy because one punch can change your pay scale. One punch can change your life.

And you're not guaranteed guaranteed guaranteed to walk out the same way you walked in. So all of that is going through your mind, running through your body, and you got to channel it. You got to process it and you got to believe and you got to be unwavering. And one thing I would always do was I would kind of just pace the locker room. And even though my team's in there, even though the commissioner's coming in and out, and again, this like controlled chaos, television cameras are in your face, producers are walking around, you hear the crowd, you hear the announcer, I would just talk to myself.

It's my night. I'm not going home without my belts. Like those types of things, they may seem corny to some people, but that stuff would really lift me up. And because a madeup mind is a hard thing to break and your mind has to be made up, not walking to the ring or when you step through those ropes, your mind has to be made up before you leave that locker room that I'm not going to be broken. I will not lose tonight. tonight. tonight. Oh my gosh.

You ever get uh you ever get there where you're at the starown and look at a dude and know you got him? Has that ever happened? Or is it on a professional level you just don't know? Has it ever happened the reverse where you're in that state, you're in that faith state, you're in that strong state, and you've looked, you're like, "Oh, I got this fool." Has that ever happened? You don't have to tell me who. Most times, no. Okay. Okay. Okay. Because Because Because as fighters, we can lie.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We're good chameleons. Mhm. Mhm. Mhm. Because in the sport of boxing, if you show weakness Yeah. the opponent's going to pounce. So, we hide a lot of our emotions. You know, you got some guys that are scared to death and they they they'll they'll put a mask on. There's one time one time in a 32 fight career that I knew I had a guy at the weighin. Chad Dawson. You knew. And you even told me who it was. And by the way, Chad Dawson was a great fighter.

But you knew. How did you know? Why did you know? He He He So, you get a lot of rumors and you hear a lot of hearsay in training camp. Yeah. this guy, you know, they'll call my coach and I stayed away from that stuff, but my coach always had his ear to what was going on with my opponent and he would decide on what he would what he wanted to share and what he wouldn't want to share. The guy Edison Miranda that I just told you about, you about, you about, he was sparring with Chad Dawson to help Chad Dawson get ready for our fight.

Big fight. Chad Dawson was the the lineal light heavyweight champion. Had just beat the the great legendary Bernard Hopkins Hopkins Hopkins the fight before. Yes. tall, rangy. He beat Bernard Hopkins. He's on HBO. Max Kellerman asked him, you know, Chad, what do you want next? I'm minding my own business. He calls my name. I just won the Super Six. He said, I want Andre Ward. He said, I'll fight him in his hometown of Oakland, California, and I go down to his weight, too. I said, "Really?" "Really?" "Really?" And I and I and I like Chad.

Like, I supported Chad and didn't see that coming. coming. coming. That was like the easiest fight that we ever negotiated right there. And I held him to every single word that he spoke. Every word. Every word. Every word. Hey, come my weight, my place. So, they get into training camp and because he's losing so much weight, his punch resistance isn't there. Edison Miranda can crack. Edison Miranda knocks him out and sparring. It was sparring. Stuff starts to circulate. Verge comes to me. He said, "Listen, bae." He said, "Call me bae.

Listen, bae. I'm not saying this to get you off track. We got to stay focused. We were probably about two and a half, maybe three weeks away from the fight. Maybe about two and a half. He said, "I'm hearing some things, man. I'm hearing that that that Edison Miranda, he knocked Chad out." Said, "Knocked him out." He said, "Knocked him out." Like they had to stop the sparring, help him up, and that was it for the day. Now, if you're a fighter, like that's like the worst case scenario.

It's one thing if you get knocked out in a fight, you got small gloves on, no head gear, it happens. That's acceptable in some respects. In sparring, nah. No. Not if you're the top dude. There may be a sparring partner getting knocked out, but not the top guy, not the champion. the champion. the champion. That was a no. No. Started hearing rumors. I'm kind of processing like, man, he got knocked down. Man, that's crazy. But in my mind, I'm always very much in my head, especially in training camp.

So, I'm like, uh, maybe they're just floating out there to get in my head or trying to get me off track. That's what Ver, they said, but don't don't, you know, don't don't worry about it too much. Just, you know, stay focused. We kept hearing stuff. Kept hearing stuff. Nothing ever went on the airwaves. Nothing nothing on the internet. nothing. Press conference came the week of the fight. I'm thinking, man, I wonder if they're going to say something. So, rumor going to come out if I'm going to be asked about it.

It's never asked about it. The weighin comes Friday, the fight Saturday. I said, "Now I'mma drop it on him. Now I'mma drop it on him." We go face to face. And his team, they're over there woofing. My team's kind of woofing a little bit. And I leaned in his ear and I said, "Hey, man. I heard what happened in that gym. I said, "You better tighten it up tomorrow night." And you just see his shoulders just go, "Oh my god." And he's got this look on his face like, "How did you know I won the fight with Chad Dawson right there." there." there." Oh my gosh.

We turn and look at the cameras, turn back and look at him before I walk off the stage. I broke him. Just like He just knew. Broke him. Broke him. Broke him. That is an awesome story. Thought he got away with He thought it's too late. You can't get out of the fight now. fight now. fight now. That is awesome, man. That is That was the only time I ever felt like I want to fight when I get that time. Thank you for all of that insight of that and what it's like getting wrapped.

Like, thank you. I don't know if I've ever told that story before. story before. story before. That's awesome. Well, we're keeping it in whether you want to or not. I'm keeping that one in there. No, we do. do. do. You're so softspoken and gentle and you're such a big strong man. Is this new? Is this a different you? In other words, even the way that you speak, there's a there's a there's a cadence. You got to be aware of this. There's a cadence. There's an ease.

There's a pace to it. I'm curious if or maybe you don't even know. Was if I met you 20 years ago, was there did that exist? Was this always your disposition, so to speak, or has your disposition changed as you've been willing to share with yourself all of the emotions that a man should be experiencing? experiencing? experiencing? I've I've changed. I have to ask. I would like to ask her. Let's ask her what you what you think. He's changed. Even his Kate, his daughter's here. She's off camera, guys, but I was curious.

Even his disposition and cuz I've noticed that with myself. I've listened to audios of me 20 years ago. I still have a deep voice. I'm still aggressive. I still talk quickly, but there was an edge and an aggression to even the way I spoke that is somewhat different now. And Alexis, you see that? Absolutely. People always talk to me about his whisper. Yes. He has this whisper very engaging. Okay. But that wasn't there to your point as he's developed. I got it. Even slowed down how he speaks.

So those of you that can't hear Alexis, she's saying that he slows down. Even the way that he speaks is much different as he's changed. And I think that's an external manifestation of something that's happened internally within you. It's very noticeable with you. It's one of the things I noticed right away with you was that there's this strong man um visually very strong man who is frankly strong enough to communicate in a very gentle and kind way that's pleasant to be with. It's not it's not off-putting to be with.

And I just think all of you should know that over time I think Jason's an example of just subtle changes you may not even know but your daughter knows sitting here change with you. you. you. I I had no idea you say cadence. I'm like, you talking about riding a bike or something? I have no idea. It's the way that you you're well, it's welcoming. It it allows someone to sit with you and um be present themselves. Awesome. Awesome. Awesome. And I think when when people become more vulnerable in the way they express themselves, themselves, themselves, it almost gives you permission in their presence to be that way.

So the and the reason I say this is this just dawning on me is that I have a son who's a kind young man. He's a gentle, pretty strong, much bigger than me, much stronger. But I'd like to think that maybe a little bit of that is because the I he was fortunate enough that the former me isn't the one that raised him. That for the most part it was a guy who had done some of this work that raised him. And I just think it gives people permission to be in your presence.

I want to share something with you and then ask you about it cuz I see this all over you. over you. over you. We have a more in common than you might think in that when I left I played baseball when I was done playing college. I was unemployed just living at my parents house. My dad gets sober. He goes to his first AA meeting. My dad gets sober. Comes back from the first meeting says I got you a job. Turns out it was an orphanage.

It was a boy's home. A big one though. My boys were all removed from their homes or their parents were incarcerated or dead. And um but what I discovered by working with these boys, I was their big brother. I took them to school. I was there when they opened presents on Christmas day, you know, took them trick-or-treating. I was there when they got in a fight at school or broke up with their girlfriend or whatever it was. People always ask me, "What do these boys want from you?" And what I found from them was they wanted me to love them.

They wanted someone to love them, care about them, believe in them, and maybe just show them how to live a little bit better. And as I got older and I got into business, people say, "Why'd you have some success in business?" Cuz that's what everybody wants. All people want you to love them. They want you to care about them. They want you to believe in them. They want you to show them how to do a little better or help them. And I find that that's your overall if I distilled down your message, the reason I agree with it and love it so much is it appears to me that that's what you do.

do. do. You know, I'm I'm glad you said that because when I first started the Cave of Adellum for Boys, it was just martial arts and discipline because although I I rather I always tell men in the reset to the lamb, no one wants to be in fight orflight response the whole time when you got to be tough and mean mugging the whole time. time. time. Can I go there? Absolutely. But if I could stay majority of time here, this is where I want to be.

When I started working with the boys and I was different, I was a different guy then. I was all about structure, discipline, toughness, fortitude, and I still am. Yes. However, I want you to be comprehensive. Boot camp programs were very popular and scared straight programs were popular where you would take kids into school into prison. Yeah. And to get them scared enough to say, "Hey, I don't want to act up ever again. I discovered quickly, man, that retraumatizing someone never heals the trauma that you experience.

Boot camps program started failing at alarming rates. And I started shifting. I went from just a discipline program to a place where it's a safe space. And then I discovered that our boys didn't need more discipline. They needed more love. love. love. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Soon as I gave them that, you know, our first program was in Highland Park, Michigan. If I was late, these boys, I'm talking about tough kids, they would sweep and clean the room, everything, move the desk out, and they would sit there purposefully so that I could see them and say, "Wow, that's great.

You guys didn't know." They just wanted the affirmation. They wanted to love. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's why they act out and that's what I give them. I give them what I longed for. I'm literally I became what I wanted. And that's what that's what it is. It's no secret. I became a man who's strong but sensitive, who's compassionate but caring, someone who can encourage you when you need to push through some pain, but also encourage you to express sorrow when you need to apologize to someone or feel the grief so that you can do something to transform someone's life.

If you're only you're stuck in just masculine attributes, you can see something wrong, but you say, "No, I'm feeling something different. that ain't gonna make I won't be a man. So they shy away from that. So true. So true. So true. When we change as men, I'm I say this and I didn't say you didn't say this. This world will change. You're right. You're right. You're right. When we can change like really become comprehensive, comprehensive, comprehensive, misogynistic behavior, I can go down the line line line will change.

And and that's inside working from the inside out. Welcome back to Max Out everybody. I'm fired up about today's topic because we're going to talk about one of the things that I think is the most important things as it relates to winning. And it's one of the things that you can decide you're going to do without any natural giftedness because it's the number one talent you must develop in order to win. And it's not talked about on social media. You're not going to get it in a personal development tape and a peak performance program, self-help, and any of it.

Remember this. The best ability is availability. Did you hear that? The best ability is availability. that you are available to win. Not enough people understand that this is an actual skill and talent. Most people in business or in life, whether it be relationships or the financial part of their life, they're always looking for these little tips and skills that you should develop, how to communicate better, how to be a better listener, how to suppress your ego, how to influence people, how to transfer energy, all these things that I teach, how to deal with failure.

But I believe the greatest talent that you can draw a line through. All the people who have won. Not all the people that win in business or life are unbelievable transfers of energy. Not all of them can close. Not all of them can persuade. None of them are great listeners. Not all of them even dealt well with adversity. They did that the majority of the time. But all of them have in common. They develop the talent. And yes, it is a talent. It is a skill of not quitting.

I don't think most of you right now that are struggling in your business life right now are giving yourself enough credit for this incredible talent you're developing which is resiliency which is the ability not to quit. Listen to what I'm telling you as somebody has built multiple different companies. I've coached some of the top athletes, entertainers, business people, and politicians in the world. And I'm telling you that even in my own team when I hire people, I look for resiliency. And a notch above that is the talent, is the skill of not quitting as the number one thing that I look for.

And many of you right now listening to this possess the number one skill necessary to win. And don't give yourself any credit for it. Which means it's not helping build your confidence. It's not going to the bank of crediting for your identity. And so although you possess this incredible ability that so many people in the world don't have and don't possess, you have it and you don't value it. You don't prize it. You don't give yourself credit for having it. It ought to be where you draw the majority of your confidence from the ability to say, "I don't quit.

I'm resilient. I own the number one skill, the number one talent required to eventually win. I already have. I can't quit. you'd have to kill me to get me out of chasing my dream. Right? So, number one, I want to point it out as the number one gift. The best ability is availability. Do you have it? Have you decided to have it? Is it something you're going to possess the rest of your life? And those of you that do have it already, I need you to take an inventory, be aware of it, and be intentional with crediting yourself as you're listening to this or watching it today into the bank of your self-confidence, into the bank, into the deposits you make in your identity.

because it has everything to do with winning. Every guest you've seen on my show, all the people that I've coached all have different talents, skills, and abilities. What's the one they all have? The ability to stay present, the ability to stay in the fight, to have not quit. You think, well, that's not a big deal, really. Because as I've been talking, millions of people made the decision to quit on their dream, just as I've been talking to you. The rest of the day, millions more will.

Tomorrow, millions more. Every day, literally, millions of people quit on one of their dreams, their dream relationship, their dream business, their dream body. So, quitting has become the number one habit in the world by people that end up losing. And I'm telling you, it happens every day, every second, everywhere. Just the fact that while I've been speaking, you're still after your dream. You're ahead of them. you don't give yourself enough credit because eventually what I found it looks like winning is this huge competition but every day, every week, every year, every decade as time goes by, you're going to find that you're competing with a smaller and smaller and smaller group of people for your dream because so many of them will just quit.

And by the way, many of them that quit will possess talents, maybe even gifts you don't have. Their incredible ability with people, their incredible strength, their incredible brain, and they'll quit with all this giftedness, but you got the talent. You have to learn to distinguish between something that is a talent and a gift. You can develop skills, you can develop talents. Gifts are something you're born with, but the people that I see that win long term are the ones who develop the talents and skills required to win.

Business and life's a lot like a piñata. You know, I was at a barbecue, a birthday party for a 5-year-old a while back, and they did a piñata. Have you seen the piñata before? And it's an unbelievable metaphor for life. In fact, out of we had a call today. The the life is like a pinñata because it really is. If you look at these kids at these parties, any of you that ever been to a piñata, you can picture it. They got the piñata up there.

And what do they do? It's just like in business and life when you start something new, a new relationship, a new body, a new pursuit, a new business, right? What do they do? They take this little 5-year-old and they blindfold him. They blindfold this little guy, right? And he can't see. He doesn't know where he's going. And then they spin him around. He gets completely disoriented, right? And then they hand him a bat. It's scary when you watch it, don't you picture these little kids, right?

You blindfold him. They spin him around. They become disoriented. Does that sound familiar to any of you that are trying to build a business right now? You're completely disoriented. You're blind. You don't know where to go. They spin this little guy around. They hand him a bat and they go, "Hit the piñata." And the piñata's over to the right. They're swinging to the left. They're just whiffing, right? They're not even in the right direction. And then finally, what do you do? You grab the little guy or the little girl and you turn them and you have them face the piñata.

They were completely disorient. In fact, they were doing more damage to the people around them in the beginning with that darn bat you gave them because they're so disoriented. A lot of damage was done before they even faced the actual piñata. They've been blindfolded and spun around, right? They're completely disoriented. Doesn't that sound familiar? It's just like building your new business. It's just like trying to transform your body. It might be just like this brand new relationship you've got. And in fact, the people around them are in danger in the beginning when you give these little guys this bat.

Maybe that sounds familiar. Maybe right now you're at this stage in your business or you've been there before where there's been more damage done than there's been progress. You know what I'm talking about. The people around you have been more hurt by your new venture than benefited from it. Your relationship with them is not as good. Maybe financially you've hurt them or feel like you have. There's been a lot of damage. But what do we do with these little guys? We eventually take the little girl or the little boy and we point him in the right direction at the piñata.

That's when you find Ed Milelet's podcast. You find his teachings. You find his YouTube channel or someone like me and I can point you in the right direction. And then what do these guys do? They take the bat and they're hitting the piñata as hard as they can and they're hitting it and they're hitting it and no candy comes out and they get tired, don't they? And they just they can't go anymore. So what do you do? You get help and you add a teammate. You add a friend.

You take the blindfold off of you and you get a little help. That help could be a new recruit in your business, a new employee, a new vendor. It might be a new mentor and we put the blindfold on them. We spin them around and then they're disoriented. They're swinging and they're not even hitting the piñata yet. They're they're hurting the people around them. Then what do we do? We take them. We point them in the right direction. Now they're following my show or great teachings and they hit the piñata as hard as they can.

No candy comes out. You take another child, new teammate, new recruit in life, right? But in the piñata says, "Another child, put a blindfold, spin them around, and they hit the piñata and they're hitting it as hard as they can." And it feels like no progress is being made, no candies coming out, right? And eventually they're hitting it and hitting, they get tired. And you think, man, how often they hit this piñata? What happens is sometimes the first few kids who hit the piñata, they kind of disappear from the party and start playing somewhere else.

Maybe you've had that experience in your business. Some of the people you start with, they may not finish before the candy comes out. They may not be there. may not be there to celebrate, right? Some of the initial people disappear and that could cause you to want to quit, but eventually what happens with that piñata, even though these kids are hitting the piñata and they're teaming up, they're all working together to try to make this candy come out, it doesn't look like it, but each shot on that piñata is putting them closer to the candy.

Even though it doesn't seem like it, even though you can't see the candy, every blow is like a compound pounding effect. That pounding compounded by multiple people eventually can create a breakthrough. But what most people do is they leave the party before the candy comes out. That's true in business. Most people quit before the candy comes out. They don't stick around long enough. They they got spun around. They get door disoriented. They might hurt the people around them. They get pointed in the right direction. They think they're making progress, then they don't.

They think they're making progress, then they don't. And eventually, because no candies coming out, no money, no change body, no amazing relationship, they stop swinging the bat at the piñata. But if you stick around for the party long enough, you know what always happens with a piñata? Eventually, someone hits it and bam, the candy comes out everywhere and everyone celebrates and gets all the candy and dives on it and celebrates. Here's what I'm here to remind you of today. You got to stick around long enough for the candy to come out.

You got to wait for the candy to come out of that piñata called your life, called your business, called your body, called your relationships. The vast majority of people in life don't stick around for the candy because they think as they're hitting the piñata of their life, they don't think they're making progress. It doesn't feel like progress. But I'm telling you, the number one ability is availability. And if you keep swinging away every day, even though it doesn't feel like it, you are getting closer to the candy.

You're getting closer. It just doesn't feel like it. You know what I had? I had the ability to keep hitting the piñata in my life to stick around long enough. And by the way, when you eventually win, it's not just you that gets all the candy, that gets all the victory, that gets all the money. Lots of people around you, many of which who you were hurting originally with that bat, many of them who were trying to talk you out of it, they get to celebrate in the candy, too.

My prayer for you is that you begin to think about this analogy. The piñata of your life, the piñata of your business, the piñata of your body. As you're swinging away, I'm here to tell you, even though it doesn't feel like it, you're getting closer to the candy. And if you can add more people to celebrate, it's okay that you feel disoriented. It's okay that it feels blinding and you don't know exactly what direction to go, just like these precious babies with the piñata. It's okay that you miss it once in a while.

It's okay that you get tired once in a while, but as long as you keep after it and you keep pounding away that compound effort of your pounding, I can promise you there's candy someday and everybody around you will jump on it and celebrate. That's my wish for you today as you listen to me of all the skills I'm going to teach you that I've taught you. And if you've not listened to my other shows, I teach about listening, transfer energy, how to close, how to change your identity, how to live blissfully, sissatisfied, how to unlock your success code, all of the very detailed things I teach.

Today is the most important thing is that as you learn all these skills, it'll help you with the blindness. Every single skill you learn, you'll see clearer and clearer and clearer. But if you don't develop the talent, the number one skill in the world, which is to keep hitting the piñata and to stick around until the candy comes out. Because here's the deal. Someone's going to get the candy in life. There's always candy in life. That piñata eventually always breaks down. Do you want to be the person who was there in the beginning hitting as hard as you could and sacrificing and maybe hurting the people around you and never get the candy?

Or are you going to get something for your pain? Are you going to get something for your effort? Are you going to get something for this sacrifice you're making? You got to get something for this pain. You got to stick in the game until the candy comes out and then we all get to celebrate. That's what I want you focused on today. I promise you there's a piñata in your life and right now many of you feel blind and disoriented, maybe even hurting the people around you.

Some of you are past that phase and you're hitting your thing hard every day, but there's no candy yet. I promise you there's going to be a payoff for you. One thing that's a lot of people are listening to this and they know they've got that thing. They're not working out like they should. Maybe they are in that text thing. Maybe it's that they don't eat the way they should. They don't make the contact they should. They're not up as early. They got a thing. But they're winning in spite of it, right?

In spite of it, they've got some winning going on because in spite of the fact for many years, Dean, that you weren't as congruent as you wanted to be. You were still producing financial success massively. massively. massively. Massively. But what's happened the last four or five years is your life has become a freaking rocket ship in terms of influence re you guys Dean's been famous a long time you go back to all the infomercial days if you're if you've not seen Dean or you hear this voice it's because Dean was all over television forever very successful in that space in the influence space the real estate space as he was not congruent in every area of his life but man the last four or five years so speak to that if you can solve that thing you got it's like a football team who's got no running game.

Man, if they could just run the football, they've already got a good passing game. Their defense is good. They're a playoff team already, but if they could run the football, they're going to win the Super Bowl. There's always that thing, right? True or false? or false? or false? So, okay. And I love this question and I love hanging out with you, man. And and thank you for everybody listening. I know you have lots of options. So, thanks for hanging out with two friends talking about stuff where I had no idea what we were talking about.

So, this is really cool. Um, here's what I know. What happens sometimes? I'll tell you what I did for a decade. If we're going to talk about relationships, I'll be completely transparent. I thought about leaving my relationship every day of my life for 5 years. It was almost the first thing I thought about every day. Not because she's a bad human in any way. There were just it just wasn't the right fit. I'm not an advocate of divorce, but it just didn't fit. But here's what I did for years.

years. years. I was financially successful. At the time, I thought I was the best dad possible, even though I wasn't showing them the best example. But I thought, I I'm an engaged father. I coach little league, coach softball. I'm there. I bring them to school, make them lunches, love them to death. I'm a great leader to my team. I'm a good friend to people who need me. So, my relationship's off, and I'm not congruent. I should be freaking fortunate. So, who gets it all? This is what I remember.

Who Oh, you want it all, Dean. You want love and congruency and a good dad and financially free. And I remember just thinking, stop being greedy. If your relationship doesn't work, but really what I was doing, Ed, is I wasn't facing something because it was scary to me. It was scary. Leaving my kids and not thinking thinking of not being with my kids every single day was like a shot in the gut the gut the gut and I just ignored it and avoided it. And it grew.

It grew to where I didn't become the man that I was supposed to be. I listen, whatever you believe in, God, the universe, I believe in God. And I believe God has created you to be bigger, better, and stronger than you currently are. No matter where you are in your life, God wants you to be the woman you were meant to be, the man you were meant to be. And and if you believe in karma, whatever your beliefs are, you're meant to be more. And when you let one of those areas build, it doesn't go away.

I don't care how much I try to push it down on the inside, it just kept growing. And you feel that you like you're looking away from it even though it's there. And I want you to think about this. When you have to some things are difficult. You might have to face a a change of a business, a change of a business partner, change of a job, change in a relationship. The thing that you've been avoiding is growing even though you think it's not. Wow. Wow.

Wow. And it's like got roots and the roots are creeping over into all areas of your life and you don't know it. And you're working harder, stronger, faster to overcome this. And you think you're conquering it. If you're in a relationship that's not good and maybe you go to the strip club or you text on your phone or you do something and you think you're fulfilling it, you're not. You're just letting the roots grow in deeper and stronger and you're working twice as hard to be successful and you don't even realize it.

And and here's the way I looked at it. When I decided or we decided to get a divorce, and you can use this analogy, you could tell I got some silly analogies. You can use this in any area of your life. Picture your ship is in a in a in a bay. It's calm. The water's calm. There's other great ships in the bay. The weather's kind of beautiful. It's kind of nice, but you know, you're not meant to be in that bay, but man, it just has all the signs you're supposed to be there, but the only way out of that bay is you got to sail your ship through the storm that's out in the ocean and you're watching the storm and you're watching how turbulent it is.

You're you're in the bay and it's comfortable, but the only way to your next level, the only way to break through, the only way to get rid of those roots to to kind of crush that thing that's you're avoiding or afraid of is you got to sail your ship through the storm. You see the storm, it's turbulent, the waves are high, the sky is dark, and you're not even sure because you've never navigated that territory. You don't have a map because you've never been there, you've never experienced it.

And the way I looked at it when I was going through a divorce is I was so scared of for my kids, not me being alone, but scared on how that would work out with my kids that a lot of times I put my ship in the storm. It got bumpy and I went back to the bay. the bay. the bay. And I'll tell you, when I finally said, I can't be the man I'm supposed to be staying in this harbor, even though it's pretty and there's great people around.

And it's going through that storm, going through the the changes, the the the navigating of new territory. You're mapping out new territory on the fly and your ship's going down and you want to turn back a hundred times. But there's this moment and it happened to me when I went through a divorce. There was this moment where I didn't know if I could take it and I was scared for my kids and I was having anxiety attacks. But I want to share with you there was this moment that my ship landed on the other side of the storm and it was over.

And I was a different human. I was a different man. I looked through a different lens. I had a new map. And I realized I wasn't meant for that other bay. Yes, it was safe. Yes, it was okay. But listen, at the end of our lives, do we want to be okay, right? And when I got to the other side, it was this fresh start. I I found a way to be friends with my ex. I found a way for my kids to be safe. I found a way to replace qual quantity with quality with my children.

I found a way to be a better version of me and attract Lisa in my life. And when those roots were gone, this is what I want to share with all of you for that one area of your life that you know what I'm talking about. As you're hearing this, you're picturing it and you're going, "Wow, nobody really knows that I do that when no one's watching. Nobody knows that I'd like to fix that. No one knows that I kind of BS everybody else and say I'm working on it, but I'm not." I want to tell you, when they go away, your your sailboat turns into a a ship with five engines on it.

Like my life exponentially grew. I became a better dad, a better leader, a better friend. I had more compassion, had more empathy. I replaced anger with compassion, and things just I just became a different person. I mean, I think I was a good man 10 years ago, but I wouldn't recognize him. I'm not the same human today. And that allowed me to go faster. And and I just encourage you, you've heard this before, but your next level lives on the thing on the other side of the thing you're avoiding, the other thing you're afraid of.

And Ed, I think I heard you say this. You know, all of us, we we get to learn from each other and listen to each other and I'll go listen to a podcast when I need I'll listen to a little Ed Mylet or watch. But I remember somebody saying, and it may have been you may have been you, but what what drives me to fix those pieces, guys, and I want you to hear this. the business that you want to scale, start, the relationship you want to fix or end, the parenting style that you you've gone so long doing it one way, you think it's too late and you got to fight for it, it's worth the fight.

Whatever it is, the fight, I I just want to tell you, I I picture I've always pictured being at the end of my life and having a conversation with God. And he said, "How did it go?" Y, Y, Y, right? Always picture that. And I always had the fear of going, "Well, you know, I was in a good relationship, right? Or things were okay. You know, I was great at my business, great at impacting lives, and I did this and I was a good dad. What about relationship?

It was okay. Like, I picture saying that to someone where we have this creation given to us, this opportunity. And I feel like this inner disappointment where I'd want to scream and go, you know what? Damn it. Can I do that over and you don't get that chance? You don't get that chance. Like, you don't get a doover. And you'd want to. So, I put those emotions of my future back on me. Things you've again already heard. And I think I heard this from you, Ed, or someone, but I heard someone put that on a whole another level.

Could you imagine if God pulled out his iPhone and said, Ed, I appreciate all you've done and you've served and you give and that one area of life. Can I play you a quick video of the man you could have been? been? been? That's that's my stuff. Yeah, that is yours. I knew I heard that from you. When I heard that from you, Ed, it chang it honestly took what I had been I had been telling myself my last conversation with God. And when I heard that from you, I've shared that and I feel that all the time.

And if I didn't, I I want to share this with you guys and I hope it's relating to where you are in your life right now. If you're looking for what's going to drive you, what's going to take you to the next level? How do you move your lighthouse out? How do you wake up compelled again, not just want to chill, and how do you find that that that that thrive, that that energy, that zest for life again? I just want to share with you that if I didn't sail my ship out of that harbor, that safe harbor, and go through I'm not I'm I'm understating what I went through for the for I don't take aspirin.

When I was going through a divorce, worrying about my kids, I was popping Xanax three days a week cuz I couldn't control my anxiety. I was drinking a glass of wine five nights a week cuz I couldn't put myself to sleep. So, I'm I'm understating how bad I was for a short period of time. When I was in the middle of that storm, I thought of turning back because I felt so crappy about myself and worried about my kids so much. But I want to tell you on the other side, I never would have experienced what real love could be like.

I I I I have love in a way that I wish it for every single one of you. There there's nothing I I can even share that compares to having a true soulmate that's got your back, that supports you and loves you and you feel the same where you don't keep score and you got each other's back. I never would have experienced that if I didn't go through the storm. And whatever that storm is for you, you have to have that compelling future and you have to stay steadfast and realize if you go back to where you were, you'll get more of what you used to have.

You know what I'm curious about is do you have any imposttor syndrome about all this? You know, as my platform grew, more and more people started listening to me. to me. to me. You know, I was like, man, if they knew how much of this stuff I'm still working on, trying to figure out, you know, everyone's looking at me for advice and I'm I'm still trying to figure out this or that or the other thing. And it took me a while to accept that God will use my imperfections and the things I don't know and the fact that I'm more like most people than not to connect me with them.

That I don't have to be I don't have to have every answer. I don't have to know everything. Um it finally, you know, dawned on me that it's okay that all that I'm not perfect, you know, they don't have it all figured out. Is there any part of you that's like, God, why me? Like, man, I'm still I'm in my mid20s. I'm trying to figure all this stuff out myself. Is there is there any part of you that feels that way or do you just accept the anointing and the calling and you go with it?

You know, um maybe two times over this last year and two months have I ever decided to like, you know, let myself have a feeling of why me? Um you know, and it's natural, you know, it's it's supernatural. And know a lot of it came with football because I truly loved the game of football. You know, football was truly my peace away from the world. You know, I would go to practice. I would have so much going on in my personal life in college, like arguing with girlfriends and dealing with class and I'm probably arguing with my parents about something, just being a young college kid.

Like, my whole entire life is chaos. But I come to practice for these two and a half hours and I am at peace. I feel like I'm sitting at the beach listening to the waves, you know, while I'm at practice because I truly love the process of getting better. Um, you know, but to have that snatched away from you, you know, and then have the space where you truly had your peace and now you're facing your fears in that space and having to overcome that whole feeling.

Um, you know, it was it was it was something that, you know, I I I I really had to work for it, you know, but um, you know, I only asked myself why, me two times at the whole time. And then I would always just correct myself and, you know, I understand why, you know, I I I truly know that God seen me as somebody who was, you know, doing his work. you know, I was out here and I don't I don't mean to say that like I'm the most spiritual person in the world or you know, uh like I don't remember the last time I showed up for church on a Sunday.

Um you know what I mean? Just my personal life is busy. Um I have a lovely church that I do go to back at home in the Keys Rock um Pennsylvania. But you know, I don't remember the last time that I showed up to church on Sunday. So, I don't want to even seem like I'm this perfect person or I was this perfect person, you know, that God just selected me because I was above all else. Now, like you said, I'm more like everybody than I'm not.

But, you know, I was truly doing right by people. Um, I clapped for others while I waited my turn. Um, I learned from the people before me. I supported everyone. Um, and I truly let my heart walk into every room before I did. um with no expectations in return, you know, with no expectations in return. That's just because of how I was raised, you know, and I was truly a kid that, you know, I I found God within my own personal life, you know what I mean?

I grew up uh I grew up a Christian kid and I went to a Catholic high school, you know, and it it was like it was like, you know, within that journey, I had to figure out what this relationship meant to me. Um, and through that process, you know, I truly developed my own relationship and I formatted all of the goals that I want to accomplish my life off of that relationship. And uh, you know, I never asked my I tried to never ask myself or let myself, you know, get the perspective of why me because I know why me because I was doing the work and I was I was moving right by people and, you know, uh, who better than me, you know.

And you know I don't I don't want to take credit away from no one else but you know I don't know if if anyone would have you know been able to handle the situation like this. So uh you know just thinking about that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. By the way you're right. I think the other thing you know when you look at God's work in hindsight it always usually kind of lines up once you look at it. The other thing that's really obvious to me tomorrow I'll just tell you is that God chose somebody who could be a great communicator of this message.

He chose a guy who's really good with words. And not only are you good with words, but when you say things, there's an energy transfer. There's an impact. There's an emotion when you say things. That's rare when someone's gifted with the athleticism you've been gifted with. And clearly the IQ you've been gifted with. To also have the ability to communicate on the fly like you do is a very rare thing. And it's clear that I really believe that you were chosen for this. I just really do.

Um, I have to tell you as a parent, I watched a conversation your mom had. Your mom was at the game and was trying to get to you as I understand it. Is that correct? Yeah, she was here. My mom and my dad. Yeah. I'm just wondering, I asked you how it's affected you or changed you. What about how it's affected the people around you um and their lives or even the way they interact with you? I'm wondering. I mean, obviously the attention you got is crazy.

every athlete and famous person in the world's talking about you all the time. But I've, you know, you know this, when you're a college player, it's one thing. You get to the NFL, the world changes around you a little bit, right? Like just the way the world responds to you is different. is different. is different. When you're not wellknown and then you're famous, when you're poor compared to when you're rich. So I have to imagine when you're alive and then you're not for a few minutes and then you're alive again that the way the world treats you might change a little bit.

Has it changed a little bit the way the world reacts to you? you? you? Yeah, definitely man. Um, you know, the first the first way is um people are touched. Like people are truly touched and like some people like people see me, they just want to hug. Like people see me, they want to, you know, tell me a little bit about their story or, you know, somebody that they know or how they were affected or some things that they're going through personally, you know. So um people are touched in all kind of different ways and you know even outside of the situation um people see my mission you know people see the mission that I've been on um even greater now you know and that's a part of you know the blessings um because you know within my immediate family nothing has changed like my mom my dad me my brother we're all still the same people you know like this hasn't my mom and dad once I decided to play football again.

They're like, "Okay, this is what we're doing and this is what you decided to do and we're 110% behind you." You know, like whichever way it was, you know, they was going to be 110% behind me, you know. So, my parents haven't changed a bit. They're on my back just like I was in college. They're not, you know, they're not cutting me any slack. They're not, you know, the expectations aren't different. If I still come home and, you know, I spend some time at my parents house, I'm gonna be taking out the trash, doing dishes.

I'm going be vacuuming in the living room floor like you know. So, you know, my immediate family, thank God. Um, that you know, everything was still the same there. Um but you know it has caused a little bit of trouble you know within like friendships and things like that to where you know some people feel obligated to you know be around me more or you know it it it it's it's all over the place. I try to not focus on it but you know when it's the personal people around you that you grew up with that you wanted to be spending the rest of your life with that you thought would be in your wedding um you know it has a little bit of effect on you you know.

So, but um you know the people that truly love me and and love me with no expectation behind it are all still in my life. They're all still the same people with me and we're enjoying life and we all have a different perspective and a different appreciation for life for sure.