PRIYANKA CHOPRA JONAS EXCLUSIVE: The Full Story of Her Daughter's Traumatic Birth

When we were told that she's coming 27 When we were told that she's coming 27 weeks, I just shut down weeks, I just shut down weeks, I just shut down and we got a text saying her birth is and we got a text saying her birth is and we got a text saying her birth is going to be put out. We were kind of going to be put out. We were kind of going to be put out. We were kind of forced into announcing her birth. We forced into announcing her birth. We forced into announcing her birth. We weren't ready cuz we didn't know what weren't ready cuz we didn't know what weren't ready cuz we didn't know what would happen with her. What's the most surprising thing that What's the most surprising thing that you enjoy about this stage of your life you enjoy about this stage of your life you enjoy about this stage of your life that maybe you wouldn't have seen 5 that maybe you wouldn't have seen 5 that maybe you wouldn't have seen 5 years ago or maybe wouldn't have noticed years ago or maybe wouldn't have noticed years ago or maybe wouldn't have noticed 5 years ago, but you've kind of 5 years ago, but you've kind of 5 years ago, but you've kind of discovered as where you are right now of discovered as where you are right now of discovered as where you are right now of what's bringing you joy, what's you know what's bringing you joy, what's you know what's bringing you joy, what's you know lighting up your life. My daughter lighting up your life. My daughter lighting up your life. My daughter [laughter] [laughter] [laughter] and also I think I've found a sense of and also I think I've found a sense of and also I think I've found a sense of peace. I ran really fast for a really peace. I ran really fast for a really peace. I ran really fast for a really long time and it was all I knew. Um, I long time and it was all I knew. Um, I long time and it was all I knew. Um, I was dropped into a business at a very was dropped into a business at a very was dropped into a business at a very young age that I had no idea about. young age that I had no idea about. young age that I had no idea about. Nobody in my family had any idea about. Nobody in my family had any idea about. Nobody in my family had any idea about. It started with pageantss and then It started with pageantss and then It started with pageantss and then Bollywood movies and and then Hollywood. Bollywood movies and and then Hollywood. Bollywood movies and and then Hollywood. But I think in all of that, it's so But I think in all of that, it's so But I think in all of that, it's so uncertain, right? Our jobs, it's gig to uncertain, right? Our jobs, it's gig to uncertain, right? Our jobs, it's gig to gig. So, when I first started, it was gig. So, when I first started, it was gig. So, when I first started, it was just like about you have to keep moving just like about you have to keep moving just like about you have to keep moving and what's the next thing? And um it was and what's the next thing? And um it was and what's the next thing? And um it was sort of like this weird training that I sort of like this weird training that I sort of like this weird training that I didn't know how to unlearn and I didn't didn't know how to unlearn and I didn't didn't know how to unlearn and I didn't know that there was any other way of know that there was any other way of know that there was any other way of being. being. being. >> And over the last few years and I don't >> And over the last few years and I don't >> And over the last few years and I don't know if it's the influence of my husband know if it's the influence of my husband know if it's the influence of my husband moving countries um working at a moving countries um working at a moving countries um working at a different pace becoming a parent. I different pace becoming a parent. I different pace becoming a parent. I maybe it's a confluence of all of them, maybe it's a confluence of all of them, maybe it's a confluence of all of them, but I feel at a sense of peace with what but I feel at a sense of peace with what but I feel at a sense of peace with what I've been able to achieve and what I may I've been able to achieve and what I may I've been able to achieve and what I may or may not achieve. or may not achieve. or may not achieve. >> Like initially I was I'm still a >> Like initially I was I'm still a >> Like initially I was I'm still a perfectionist, but perfectionist, but perfectionist, but >> I think I was greedier when it came to >> I think I was greedier when it came to >> I think I was greedier when it came to ambition. Now, I think I ambition. Now, I think I ambition. Now, I think I um prioritize um prioritize um prioritize time with family being at home, nesting. time with family being at home, nesting. time with family being at home, nesting. Like right now, we've just moved back to Like right now, we've just moved back to Like right now, we've just moved back to our house in LA. So, unpacking, packing, our house in LA. So, unpacking, packing, our house in LA. So, unpacking, packing, putting stuff together, editing out, you putting stuff together, editing out, you putting stuff together, editing out, you know, Malty's closet. She's four. I have know, Malty's closet. She's four. I have know, Malty's closet. She's four. I have stuff in there from when she was two, stuff in there from when she was two, stuff in there from when she was two, you know, Nick stuff. It's just it's so you know, Nick stuff. It's just it's so you know, Nick stuff. It's just it's so fun to go into fun to go into fun to go into >> like I my mother-in-law taught me this, >> like I my mother-in-law taught me this, >> like I my mother-in-law taught me this, but you know, seasonal to bring out like but you know, seasonal to bring out like but you know, seasonal to bring out like everything that's seasonal in your everything that's seasonal in your everything that's seasonal in your pantry and like make sure that the pantry and like make sure that the pantry and like make sure that the plates are right and you just it's it plates are right and you just it's it plates are right and you just it's it was never something I would have enjoyed was never something I would have enjoyed was never something I would have enjoyed doing even like 7 years ago or 8 years doing even like 7 years ago or 8 years doing even like 7 years ago or 8 years ago. It's a shift in just my whole being ago. It's a shift in just my whole being ago. It's a shift in just my whole being and I'm still coming to terms with it and I'm still coming to terms with it and I'm still coming to terms with it and familiarizing myself with it. But and familiarizing myself with it. But and familiarizing myself with it. But I'm allowing myself the time to kind of I'm allowing myself the time to kind of I'm allowing myself the time to kind of be in it. I would have, you know, be in it. I would have, you know, be in it. I would have, you know, berated myself earlier. You know, made berated myself earlier. You know, made berated myself earlier. You know, made myself feel guilty for taking a day off. myself feel guilty for taking a day off. myself feel guilty for taking a day off. >> Um, I really romanticized not taking >> Um, I really romanticized not taking >> Um, I really romanticized not taking time off. So, it's a it's like a time off. So, it's a it's like a time off. So, it's a it's like a complete 360, which is I'm I'm coming to complete 360, which is I'm I'm coming to complete 360, which is I'm I'm coming to terms with it myself. Yeah, I can terms with it myself. Yeah, I can terms with it myself. Yeah, I can imagine. I mean, it feels like you're imagine. I mean, it feels like you're imagine. I mean, it feels like you're the expert of knowing when to shift the expert of knowing when to shift the expert of knowing when to shift speed because when you think about the speed because when you think about the speed because when you think about the way you dominated Bollywood and the way you dominated Bollywood and the way you dominated Bollywood and the success you had there, coming over to success you had there, coming over to success you had there, coming over to Hollywood at peak success, you know, Hollywood at peak success, you know, Hollywood at peak success, you know, when when you're already winning and when when you're already winning and when when you're already winning and then you go, "Oh, no, I want another then you go, "Oh, no, I want another then you go, "Oh, no, I want another gear." So, you come over winning here gear." So, you come over winning here gear." So, you come over winning here and then now, as you're saying, winning and then now, as you're saying, winning and then now, as you're saying, winning here and then going, "Oh, no, now I want here and then going, "Oh, no, now I want here and then going, "Oh, no, now I want a different gear." And it almost feels a different gear." And it almost feels a different gear." And it almost feels would you say it's just time and age or would you say it's just time and age or would you say it's just time and age or is there something else that allowed you is there something else that allowed you is there something else that allowed you to be at peace as you said because peace to be at peace as you said because peace to be at peace as you said because peace is such a I think we often think when is such a I think we often think when is such a I think we often think when we're young that pleasure and joy and we're young that pleasure and joy and we're young that pleasure and joy and enjoyment and happiness are the goal and enjoyment and happiness are the goal and enjoyment and happiness are the goal and then as you get older you realize peace then as you get older you realize peace then as you get older you realize peace was actually always it's having time to was actually always it's having time to was actually always it's having time to waste. waste. waste. >> What a luxury not spend because it's a >> What a luxury not spend because it's a >> What a luxury not spend because it's a currency time I feel like with your currency time I feel like with your currency time I feel like with your family with people you love or on the family with people you love or on the family with people you love or on the job. I love being on set. It's one of my job. I love being on set. It's one of my job. I love being on set. It's one of my favorite places in the world. But it's favorite places in the world. But it's favorite places in the world. But it's when you can just sit and not be when you can just sit and not be when you can just sit and not be answerable to anything. And I take that answerable to anything. And I take that answerable to anything. And I take that privilege also very seriously. I know privilege also very seriously. I know privilege also very seriously. I know this has not been handed to me. I've this has not been handed to me. I've this has not been handed to me. I've worked really hard to be where I am. So worked really hard to be where I am. So worked really hard to be where I am. So I'm allowing myself I'm allowing myself I'm allowing myself >> that time. You know, our daughter >> that time. You know, our daughter >> that time. You know, our daughter started in a new school. I love being started in a new school. I love being started in a new school. I love being able to pick her up from there, hear her able to pick her up from there, hear her able to pick her up from there, hear her stories, and like be around. And you stories, and like be around. And you stories, and like be around. And you know, maybe it's just time, age, space, know, maybe it's just time, age, space, know, maybe it's just time, age, space, where I am at the moment. I'm not sure. where I am at the moment. I'm not sure. where I am at the moment. I'm not sure. But I I think that every other pivot of But I I think that every other pivot of But I I think that every other pivot of mine didn't feel mine didn't feel mine didn't feel like it was something I controlled. like it was something I controlled. like it was something I controlled. >> Interesting. >> Interesting. >> Interesting. >> I felt pushed into it. This is the first >> I felt pushed into it. This is the first >> I felt pushed into it. This is the first time time time >> I feel like I'm allowing myself to >> I feel like I'm allowing myself to >> I feel like I'm allowing myself to >> not push myself so hard and see what >> not push myself so hard and see what >> not push myself so hard and see what happens. M happens. M happens. M >> I used to always feel like you know the >> I used to always feel like you know the >> I used to always feel like you know the sky will fall if I stop working one day. sky will fall if I stop working one day. sky will fall if I stop working one day. >> And a lot of us um are wired that way. I >> And a lot of us um are wired that way. I >> And a lot of us um are wired that way. I think especially from India and Asia we think especially from India and Asia we think especially from India and Asia we have this work ethic which our parents have this work ethic which our parents have this work ethic which our parents probably because they had to you know in probably because they had to you know in probably because they had to you know in order to survive and to make it in an order to survive and to make it in an order to survive and to make it in an ever changing world and their generation ever changing world and their generation ever changing world and their generation they they had to go really hard. So, I they they had to go really hard. So, I they they had to go really hard. So, I think our generation grew up thinking think our generation grew up thinking think our generation grew up thinking that that was the way to be. But I think that that was the way to be. But I think that that was the way to be. But I think I've learned to look inwards a little I've learned to look inwards a little I've learned to look inwards a little bit and that's okay and allowing myself bit and that's okay and allowing myself bit and that's okay and allowing myself that. Yeah. But the other pivots I just that. Yeah. But the other pivots I just that. Yeah. But the other pivots I just did the best I could. [laughter] did the best I could. [laughter] did the best I could. [laughter] I But I love that that agency and that I But I love that that agency and that I But I love that that agency and that control and and you're right the same we control and and you're right the same we control and and you're right the same we were just talking about it off camera a were just talking about it off camera a were just talking about it off camera a second ago. this idea of I was sharing second ago. this idea of I was sharing second ago. this idea of I was sharing that, you know, my mom would drop me to that, you know, my mom would drop me to that, you know, my mom would drop me to school, work during the day, pick me up, school, work during the day, pick me up, school, work during the day, pick me up, then she'd go back out to work in the then she'd go back out to work in the then she'd go back out to work in the evenings and often I'd just go with her evenings and often I'd just go with her evenings and often I'd just go with her and fall asleep by her leg while she was and fall asleep by her leg while she was and fall asleep by her leg while she was in an appointment or a meeting. And I in an appointment or a meeting. And I in an appointment or a meeting. And I just got to see how hard my mom worked. just got to see how hard my mom worked. just got to see how hard my mom worked. And that of course has lots of benefits And that of course has lots of benefits And that of course has lots of benefits as you said in terms of building as you said in terms of building as you said in terms of building discipline, hardworking mentality. And discipline, hardworking mentality. And discipline, hardworking mentality. And then at the same time, it comes a point then at the same time, it comes a point then at the same time, it comes a point where maybe you have to where maybe you have to where maybe you have to >> when you get the privilege or the >> when you get the privilege or the >> when you get the privilege or the opportunity to peel back from it to be opportunity to peel back from it to be opportunity to peel back from it to be able to shift. able to shift. able to shift. >> Yeah. And it's such a privilege like >> Yeah. And it's such a privilege like >> Yeah. And it's such a privilege like >> you have to work hard to survive in this >> you have to work hard to survive in this >> you have to work hard to survive in this life. And people work really really hard life. And people work really really hard life. And people work really really hard and some people and some people and some people >> you know work in jobs that you know you >> you know work in jobs that you know you >> you know work in jobs that you know you might not want or be in but you have to might not want or be in but you have to might not want or be in but you have to survive. So I take that survive. So I take that survive. So I take that >> that privilege of this and it's just >> that privilege of this and it's just >> that privilege of this and it's just this year honestly. this year honestly. this year honestly. >> Yeah. It's the first time first time I'm >> Yeah. It's the first time first time I'm >> Yeah. It's the first time first time I'm actually doing it actually doing it actually doing it >> where I you know want to take that >> where I you know want to take that >> where I you know want to take that moment to kind of moment to kind of moment to kind of >> indulge in my family. And I think you >> indulge in my family. And I think you >> indulge in my family. And I think you know sometimes know sometimes know sometimes hard working hard working hard working limits your mind itself to finding that limits your mind itself to finding that limits your mind itself to finding that balance balance balance >> and um but if you can find that balance >> and um but if you can find that balance >> and um but if you can find that balance um that's the dream. um that's the dream. um that's the dream. >> Yeah. Yeah. Are you uh Nick was here >> Yeah. Yeah. Are you uh Nick was here >> Yeah. Yeah. Are you uh Nick was here just literally like two 3 weeks ago. just literally like two 3 weeks ago. just literally like two 3 weeks ago. >> The best interview. >> The best interview. >> The best interview. >> Oh wow. That's >> Oh wow. That's >> Oh wow. That's >> it was the best interview. You didn't >> it was the best interview. You didn't >> it was the best interview. You didn't have to you don't have to say that. have to you don't have to say that. have to you don't have to say that. >> I don't have to say you don't have to >> I don't have to say you don't have to >> I don't have to say you don't have to say that. say that. say that. >> I had so many people who called me about >> I had so many people who called me about >> I had so many people who called me about it and just hearing it both of you. it and just hearing it both of you. it and just hearing it both of you. >> I mean, it's who you are, but it's also >> I mean, it's who you are, but it's also >> I mean, it's who you are, but it's also my husband ising my husband ising my husband ising >> just so sincere and honest and it's like >> just so sincere and honest and it's like >> just so sincere and honest and it's like disarming. Um, disarming. Um, disarming. Um, >> and to see that on camera, it was it was >> and to see that on camera, it was it was >> and to see that on camera, it was it was a wonderful interview. a wonderful interview. a wonderful interview. >> I was going to ask you, did you debrief? >> I was going to ask you, did you debrief? >> I was going to ask you, did you debrief? Do you both talk about when you get back Do you both talk about when you get back Do you both talk about when you get back from these? from these? from these? >> Not when we get back. when the clips >> Not when we get back. when the clips >> Not when we get back. when the clips come out like come out like come out like >> you know when you get back home you're >> you know when you get back home you're >> you know when you get back home you're like ah but let's watch a movie talked like ah but let's watch a movie talked like ah but let's watch a movie talked about all day about all day about all day >> I don't think we got into it like I had >> I don't think we got into it like I had >> I don't think we got into it like I had no idea about what you guys spoke about no idea about what you guys spoke about no idea about what you guys spoke about but when the clips come out and I'm but when the clips come out and I'm but when the clips come out and I'm seeing it then then of course we talk seeing it then then of course we talk seeing it then then of course we talk about about about >> no my my favorite thing is to be sitting >> no my my favorite thing is to be sitting >> no my my favorite thing is to be sitting opposite someone who's that sincere opposite someone who's that sincere opposite someone who's that sincere because it just allows for this really because it just allows for this really because it just allows for this really genuine dialogue to come out and uh yeah genuine dialogue to come out and uh yeah genuine dialogue to come out and uh yeah no I'm I'm I'm glad that you got a no I'm I'm I'm glad that you got a no I'm I'm I'm glad that you got a chance to see and I'm glad that you know chance to see and I'm glad that you know chance to see and I'm glad that you know I got to be I got to be I got to be >> it's easy to be that >> it's easy to be that >> it's easy to be that >> no it isn't >> no it isn't >> no it isn't >> and especially in our profession like I >> and especially in our profession like I >> and especially in our profession like I mean you do it differently but you know mean you do it differently but you know mean you do it differently but you know when it's a public facing profession when it's a public facing profession when it's a public facing profession you get media trained you get media trained you get media trained >> you can't help it >> you can't help it >> you can't help it >> yeah yeah >> yeah yeah >> yeah yeah >> like when you do it for long enough you >> like when you do it for long enough you >> like when you do it for long enough you know how to navigate know how to navigate know how to navigate different questions how to deflect from different questions how to deflect from different questions how to deflect from what you don't want to answer and I have what you don't want to answer and I have what you don't want to answer and I have an added layer of it because I have a an added layer of it because I have a an added layer of it because I have a pageant background so that [laughter] I pageant background so that [laughter] I pageant background so that [laughter] I can really deflect. Oh wow. can really deflect. Oh wow. can really deflect. Oh wow. >> You know, so it's for me it has always >> You know, so it's for me it has always >> You know, so it's for me it has always been really really tough um been really really tough um been really really tough um >> to reach that deep part of myself >> to reach that deep part of myself >> to reach that deep part of myself >> when I'm on camera. >> when I'm on camera. >> when I'm on camera. >> Yes, >> Yes, >> Yes, >> I find it uncomfortable. >> I find it uncomfortable. >> I find it uncomfortable. >> Um but it was very inspiring to watch >> Um but it was very inspiring to watch >> Um but it was very inspiring to watch that interview and see Nick do it. I that interview and see Nick do it. I that interview and see Nick do it. I mean that's the most inspiring thing mean that's the most inspiring thing mean that's the most inspiring thing about my husband for me and which is why about my husband for me and which is why about my husband for me and which is why You know, I give a lot of credit to You know, I give a lot of credit to You know, I give a lot of credit to being married to him to being married to him to being married to him to >> to have been able to find this ease and >> to have been able to find this ease and >> to have been able to find this ease and and comfort as I navigate life. Like and comfort as I navigate life. Like and comfort as I navigate life. Like even the the tough things even the the tough things even the the tough things um are kind of easier to handle because um are kind of easier to handle because um are kind of easier to handle because he's with me. he's with me. he's with me. >> Wow. >> Wow. >> Wow. >> And it's so different than what life was >> And it's so different than what life was >> And it's so different than what life was like 10 years ago. And so I think that, like 10 years ago. And so I think that, like 10 years ago. And so I think that, you know, it's being able to see him do you know, it's being able to see him do you know, it's being able to see him do that has helped me also that has helped me also that has helped me also get in touch with my feelings a little get in touch with my feelings a little get in touch with my feelings a little bit more and um articulate them. bit more and um articulate them. bit more and um articulate them. >> Like both of those things are mutually >> Like both of those things are mutually >> Like both of those things are mutually exclusive for me, were mutually exclusive for me, were mutually exclusive for me, were mutually exclusive for me, but now exclusive for me, but now exclusive for me, but now >> I feel them and I can talk about it >> I feel them and I can talk about it >> I feel them and I can talk about it >> and um that was a big step. >> and um that was a big step. >> and um that was a big step. >> Yeah. No, I love that. I was I mean both >> Yeah. No, I love that. I was I mean both >> Yeah. No, I love that. I was I mean both of you talked so beautifully about your of you talked so beautifully about your of you talked so beautifully about your daughter and I was wondering are you the daughter and I was wondering are you the daughter and I was wondering are you the strict one? Are you the chill one? Are strict one? Are you the chill one? Are strict one? Are you the chill one? Are you the fun one? Like as a parent like you the fun one? Like as a parent like you the fun one? Like as a parent like what is what is your go-to? If Nick's what is what is your go-to? If Nick's what is what is your go-to? If Nick's the sincere one and the the sincere one and the the sincere one and the >> you know what's what's your >> you know what's what's your >> you know what's what's your >> Yeah, I'm the mom. I have to set down >> Yeah, I'm the mom. I have to set down >> Yeah, I'm the mom. I have to set down the rules like [laughter] the rules like [laughter] the rules like [laughter] >> like I'm doing all the hard work here >> like I'm doing all the hard work here >> like I'm doing all the hard work here like like like >> um No, we both do that. We both like the >> um No, we both do that. We both like the >> um No, we both do that. We both like the good thing about our parenting and we good thing about our parenting and we good thing about our parenting and we kind of fell into this beautifully as a kind of fell into this beautifully as a kind of fell into this beautifully as a rhythm together was we always talk about rhythm together was we always talk about rhythm together was we always talk about how we will navigate a situation. how we will navigate a situation. how we will navigate a situation. >> Um and we are always on the same page >> Um and we are always on the same page >> Um and we are always on the same page when it comes to her. when it comes to her. when it comes to her. >> So there's never a decision that I will >> So there's never a decision that I will >> So there's never a decision that I will say something and he will say something say something and he will say something say something and he will say something else or we're not on the same page about else or we're not on the same page about else or we're not on the same page about it. And we just kind of naturally fell it. And we just kind of naturally fell it. And we just kind of naturally fell into that. Um, but yes, I'm usually a into that. Um, but yes, I'm usually a into that. Um, but yes, I'm usually a little bit more setting down the rules little bit more setting down the rules little bit more setting down the rules and you have to finish eating and you and you have to finish eating and you and you have to finish eating and you have to sleep at this time. We have to have to sleep at this time. We have to have to sleep at this time. We have to wake up for school like Yeah. wake up for school like Yeah. wake up for school like Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. One person has to make her >> Yeah. Yeah. One person has to make her >> Yeah. Yeah. One person has to make her schedule. schedule. schedule. >> Yeah. Yeah. One person has to do it. One >> Yeah. Yeah. One person has to do it. One >> Yeah. Yeah. One person has to do it. One person has to do it. Someone has to take person has to do it. Someone has to take person has to do it. Someone has to take the take the responsib Yeah. I I love the take the responsib Yeah. I I love the take the responsib Yeah. I I love the I love what you were saying though, the I love what you were saying though, the I love what you were saying though, like just about being open and honest in like just about being open and honest in like just about being open and honest in conversation and in the public eye and conversation and in the public eye and conversation and in the public eye and how hard that is, especially now in a how hard that is, especially now in a how hard that is, especially now in a world where we do live in a world full world where we do live in a world full world where we do live in a world full of clips like where everyone's judging of clips like where everyone's judging of clips like where everyone's judging you off what you said in 20 seconds you off what you said in 20 seconds you off what you said in 20 seconds without the context of even the fact and without the context of even the fact and without the context of even the fact and that's why I think podcasting has been that's why I think podcasting has been that's why I think podcasting has been so revolutionary and helpful in that so revolutionary and helpful in that so revolutionary and helpful in that space is someone can actually listen to space is someone can actually listen to space is someone can actually listen to someone for someone for someone for >> an hour, two hours and actually make >> an hour, two hours and actually make >> an hour, two hours and actually make sense of what they're saying rather than sense of what they're saying rather than sense of what they're saying rather than oh I saw this 30 secondond clip of a oh I saw this 30 secondond clip of a oh I saw this 30 secondond clip of a 3minut interview on a TV show and now 3minut interview on a TV show and now 3minut interview on a TV show and now this is my version of who you are and or this is my version of who you are and or this is my version of who you are and or I think you're the character you play in I think you're the character you play in I think you're the character you play in your movies. I don't really know who you your movies. I don't really know who you your movies. I don't really know who you are. So I wonder why is it important for are. So I wonder why is it important for are. So I wonder why is it important for you to be yourself fully now on an you to be yourself fully now on an you to be yourself fully now on an interview or on a show? Like why why are interview or on a show? Like why why are interview or on a show? Like why why are you even trying to do that? Why is that you even trying to do that? Why is that you even trying to do that? Why is that even meaningful to you? What what would even meaningful to you? What what would even meaningful to you? What what would that provide for you right now at this? that provide for you right now at this? that provide for you right now at this? >> I don't know if I can. I'm trying it. >> I don't know if I can. I'm trying it. >> I don't know if I can. I'm trying it. I'm trying it out with you. I'm trying it out with you. I'm trying it out with you. >> Trying out with me. [laughter] >> Trying out with me. [laughter] >> Trying out with me. [laughter] >> You're my guinea pig. >> You're my guinea pig. >> You're my guinea pig. >> I love it. Oh, great. This is the >> I love it. Oh, great. This is the >> I love it. Oh, great. This is the experiment. Amazing. I love it. experiment. Amazing. I love it. experiment. Amazing. I love it. >> I don't know if I can. I don't know if >> I don't know if I can. I don't know if >> I don't know if I can. I don't know if you'll be able to get past that. you'll be able to get past that. you'll be able to get past that. >> Um, but no, I think I it's the opposite. >> Um, but no, I think I it's the opposite. >> Um, but no, I think I it's the opposite. >> I think I have >> I think I have >> I think I have >> come to a place in my life where I'm >> come to a place in my life where I'm >> come to a place in my life where I'm more in touch with my own feelings. more in touch with my own feelings. more in touch with my own feelings. >> Hence, being able to >> Hence, being able to >> Hence, being able to >> be confident enough to talk about real >> be confident enough to talk about real >> be confident enough to talk about real things versus deflect deflecting it things versus deflect deflecting it things versus deflect deflecting it into, you know, what I want you to into, you know, what I want you to into, you know, what I want you to >> kind of think. And so now I'm like, I'll >> kind of think. And so now I'm like, I'll >> kind of think. And so now I'm like, I'll try it with Jay. try it with Jay. try it with Jay. >> Perfect. Thank you for trusting me. >> Perfect. Thank you for trusting me. >> Perfect. Thank you for trusting me. >> Comfortable seat, trustworthy man. >> Comfortable seat, trustworthy man. >> Comfortable seat, trustworthy man. >> Yeah, I appreciate that. Thank you. >> Yeah, I appreciate that. Thank you. >> Yeah, I appreciate that. Thank you. That's very kind. No, it's but but it's That's very kind. No, it's but but it's That's very kind. No, it's but but it's real. It's it's it's such a real thing real. It's it's it's such a real thing real. It's it's it's such a real thing you're talking about. It's not easy to you're talking about. It's not easy to you're talking about. It's not easy to do that. And I think you're so right do that. And I think you're so right do that. And I think you're so right about when you're still trying to figure about when you're still trying to figure about when you're still trying to figure yourself out and sometimes when you're yourself out and sometimes when you're yourself out and sometimes when you're in the change, it's like everyone wants in the change, it's like everyone wants in the change, it's like everyone wants to know everything about you, but it's to know everything about you, but it's to know everything about you, but it's like you're so in transition. Yeah. like you're so in transition. Yeah. like you're so in transition. Yeah. >> That you're like, I have nothing to >> That you're like, I have nothing to >> That you're like, I have nothing to share. I I feel like that between when share. I I feel like that between when share. I I feel like that between when I'm writing books. So when I have a I'm writing books. So when I have a I'm writing books. So when I have a book, I have lots to talk about because book, I have lots to talk about because book, I have lots to talk about because I've just spent 2, three years studying I've just spent 2, three years studying I've just spent 2, three years studying this theme and looking at the science this theme and looking at the science this theme and looking at the science and the research and the wisdom and all and the research and the wisdom and all and the research and the wisdom and all this stuff. And then people invite me on this stuff. And then people invite me on this stuff. And then people invite me on interviews in between. I'm like, "Guys, interviews in between. I'm like, "Guys, interviews in between. I'm like, "Guys, I've got nothing to say because I'm I've got nothing to say because I'm I've got nothing to say because I'm working on new ideas. I'm I'm building working on new ideas. I'm I'm building working on new ideas. I'm I'm building new ideas and I don't want to just say new ideas and I don't want to just say new ideas and I don't want to just say what I said before." I will give you what I said before." I will give you what I said before." I will give you credit though. I think you're being a credit though. I think you're being a credit though. I think you're being a little bit hard on yourself because I little bit hard on yourself because I little bit hard on yourself because I remember the last time we I interviewed remember the last time we I interviewed remember the last time we I interviewed you, the way you spoke about your you, the way you spoke about your you, the way you spoke about your parents and what you've learned from parents and what you've learned from parents and what you've learned from them and just how much impact they've them and just how much impact they've them and just how much impact they've had on you that not only is extremely had on you that not only is extremely had on you that not only is extremely genuine, it resonates really strongly genuine, it resonates really strongly genuine, it resonates really strongly and I know it resonated with our and I know it resonated with our and I know it resonated with our audience. Like that interview we did 5 audience. Like that interview we did 5 audience. Like that interview we did 5 years ago has like 3 million views years ago has like 3 million views years ago has like 3 million views >> and it's like people got so much from >> and it's like people got so much from >> and it's like people got so much from it. So I think you are being a bit hard it. So I think you are being a bit hard it. So I think you are being a bit hard on yourself and I just want to let you on yourself and I just want to let you on yourself and I just want to let you off the hook a little bit because would off the hook a little bit because would off the hook a little bit because would you say that's been a trait of yours as you say that's been a trait of yours as you say that's been a trait of yours as well as part of your that that ambition well as part of your that that ambition well as part of your that that ambition that drive? Have you been had to be hard that drive? Have you been had to be hard that drive? Have you been had to be hard on yourself through this? on yourself through this? on yourself through this? >> My therapist thinks so. [laughter] >> My therapist thinks so. [laughter] >> My therapist thinks so. [laughter] >> What does your therapist say? That's >> What does your therapist say? That's >> What does your therapist say? That's what I want to know. What is what does what I want to know. What is what does what I want to know. What is what does the therapist assessment? the therapist assessment? the therapist assessment? >> Yeah, that's apparently a character >> Yeah, that's apparently a character >> Yeah, that's apparently a character trait of mine that trait of mine that trait of mine that >> I'm very hard on myself. I didn't know >> I'm very hard on myself. I didn't know >> I'm very hard on myself. I didn't know that. I've recently like I'm really that. I've recently like I'm really that. I've recently like I'm really turning the lens on myself a little bit turning the lens on myself a little bit turning the lens on myself a little bit in the last few years uh where I'm kind in the last few years uh where I'm kind in the last few years uh where I'm kind of trying to get to know this new me. of trying to get to know this new me. of trying to get to know this new me. >> There are things that I do and say where >> There are things that I do and say where >> There are things that I do and say where I'm like wow this would not have been my I'm like wow this would not have been my I'm like wow this would not have been my reaction. reaction. reaction. >> Wow. >> Wow. >> Wow. >> Like 6 years ago patience >> Like 6 years ago patience >> Like 6 years ago patience like I was not patient. like I was not patient. like I was not patient. I mean I really I'm still like I move I mean I really I'm still like I move I mean I really I'm still like I move very fast. I make quick decisions. cuz I very fast. I make quick decisions. cuz I very fast. I make quick decisions. cuz I try to be like I'm always 5 seconds try to be like I'm always 5 seconds try to be like I'm always 5 seconds ahead when it comes to work. But I I ahead when it comes to work. But I I ahead when it comes to work. But I I think having a toddler will teach you think having a toddler will teach you think having a toddler will teach you patience that it's never in your patience that it's never in your patience that it's never in your control. [laughter] control. [laughter] control. [laughter] >> I think that that's sometimes I think >> I think that that's sometimes I think >> I think that that's sometimes I think about it. I'm like I know that the about it. I'm like I know that the about it. I'm like I know that the biggest personal growth I'll ever have biggest personal growth I'll ever have biggest personal growth I'll ever have is having a kid. is having a kid. is having a kid. >> Absolutely. >> Absolutely. >> Absolutely. >> Yeah. Yeah. You you you think Yeah. I'm >> Yeah. Yeah. You you you think Yeah. I'm >> Yeah. Yeah. You you you think Yeah. I'm always like Yeah. You think you've done always like Yeah. You think you've done always like Yeah. You think you've done all the selfwork and then you'll have a all the selfwork and then you'll have a all the selfwork and then you'll have a child, Jay, and you'll know exactly how child, Jay, and you'll know exactly how child, Jay, and you'll know exactly how far you are. no idea in the directions far you are. no idea in the directions far you are. no idea in the directions your personality will change. your personality will change. your personality will change. >> You cannot predict it. >> You cannot predict it. >> You cannot predict it. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> It depends on who your kid is and who >> It depends on who your kid is and who >> It depends on who your kid is and who they turn into and it just you become they turn into and it just you become they turn into and it just you become metamorphosized into this other person metamorphosized into this other person metamorphosized into this other person >> and in every aspect priorities suddenly >> and in every aspect priorities suddenly >> and in every aspect priorities suddenly change and everyone had told me that change and everyone had told me that change and everyone had told me that before but when you're living it it's before but when you're living it it's before but when you're living it it's it's it's really wild. it's it's really wild. it's it's really wild. >> Yeah. So, I'm still trying to get to >> Yeah. So, I'm still trying to get to >> Yeah. So, I'm still trying to get to know this new me know this new me know this new me >> who's completely different from even the >> who's completely different from even the >> who's completely different from even the one you probably spoke about 5 years one you probably spoke about 5 years one you probably spoke about 5 years ago. Like, this was that was before I ago. Like, this was that was before I ago. Like, this was that was before I became a parent. And um so, it'll be fun became a parent. And um so, it'll be fun became a parent. And um so, it'll be fun to get to know her. to get to know her. to get to know her. >> Yeah. What what have you discovered so >> Yeah. What what have you discovered so >> Yeah. What what have you discovered so far that's been the most surprising to far that's been the most surprising to far that's been the most surprising to you or something that you're like, "Oh, you or something that you're like, "Oh, you or something that you're like, "Oh, I didn't know that was there." Like, I didn't know that was there." Like, I didn't know that was there." Like, what what was something that you came what what was something that you came what what was something that you came across recently that stood out to you across recently that stood out to you across recently that stood out to you about yourself that you've been finding, about yourself that you've been finding, about yourself that you've been finding, discovering, searching? I'm much more discovering, searching? I'm much more discovering, searching? I'm much more patient with things when they don't work patient with things when they don't work patient with things when they don't work out. M out. M out. M >> I would like I said or you said observed >> I would like I said or you said observed >> I would like I said or you said observed was very hard on myself when something was very hard on myself when something was very hard on myself when something wouldn't work out or I would you know wouldn't work out or I would you know wouldn't work out or I would you know like just be mad and my approach to like like just be mad and my approach to like like just be mad and my approach to like figuring out why it didn't go the way I figuring out why it didn't go the way I figuring out why it didn't go the way I needed it to go like the control that I needed it to go like the control that I needed it to go like the control that I needed to have like I just I I feel like needed to have like I just I I feel like needed to have like I just I I feel like it's okay to not have that and that's a it's okay to not have that and that's a it's okay to not have that and that's a huge change in me because it's affected huge change in me because it's affected huge change in me because it's affected every aspect of my life how I interact every aspect of my life how I interact every aspect of my life how I interact with human beings things um how I with human beings things um how I with human beings things um how I approach work that I take on definitely approach work that I take on definitely approach work that I take on definitely how I parent even how I am at home it's how I parent even how I am at home it's how I parent even how I am at home it's made me self-sufficient it's made me made me self-sufficient it's made me made me self-sufficient it's made me rely on myself a little bit more it's rely on myself a little bit more it's rely on myself a little bit more it's like created a sense of confidence which like created a sense of confidence which like created a sense of confidence which um again this is something that I have um again this is something that I have um again this is something that I have preached I know my mind knows but I was preached I know my mind knows but I was preached I know my mind knows but I was never able to implement never able to implement never able to implement >> to myself which was you know when you're >> to myself which was you know when you're >> to myself which was you know when you're holding on to something really really holding on to something really really holding on to something really really tight you know you're you're exhausting tight you know you're you're exhausting tight you know you're you're exhausting your muscles. your muscles. your muscles. >> So tiring >> So tiring >> So tiring >> and that's people who like to control >> and that's people who like to control >> and that's people who like to control things and you know like alpha things and you know like alpha things and you know like alpha personalities or like it has to go my personalities or like it has to go my personalities or like it has to go my way. way. way. >> Um and maybe that was how I achieved >> Um and maybe that was how I achieved >> Um and maybe that was how I achieved what I did and my ambition showed itself what I did and my ambition showed itself what I did and my ambition showed itself in you know being a control freak almost in you know being a control freak almost in you know being a control freak almost like holding on really tight. Um, but like holding on really tight. Um, but like holding on really tight. Um, but that's something I've really consciously that's something I've really consciously that's something I've really consciously and subconsciously worked on. As soon as and subconsciously worked on. As soon as and subconsciously worked on. As soon as I recognized the ease of letting the I recognized the ease of letting the I recognized the ease of letting the universe kind of push you in the universe kind of push you in the universe kind of push you in the direction you're meant to go and then direction you're meant to go and then direction you're meant to go and then within that, of course, work hard every within that, of course, work hard every within that, of course, work hard every day to, you know, achieve your goals day to, you know, achieve your goals day to, you know, achieve your goals through the day. But it's okay if once through the day. But it's okay if once through the day. But it's okay if once in a while it doesn't turn out to be the in a while it doesn't turn out to be the in a while it doesn't turn out to be the way you thought it should be because you way you thought it should be because you way you thought it should be because you might end up with what you need might end up with what you need might end up with what you need >> instead of what you wanted >> instead of what you wanted >> instead of what you wanted >> which is even more important. >> which is even more important. >> which is even more important. >> Yeah. There's a beautiful Zen teaching >> Yeah. There's a beautiful Zen teaching >> Yeah. There's a beautiful Zen teaching that says letting go is hard but holding that says letting go is hard but holding that says letting go is hard but holding on is harder. on is harder. on is harder. >> Definitely. >> Definitely. >> Definitely. >> And it's exactly what you just described >> And it's exactly what you just described >> And it's exactly what you just described like when you're trying to hold on to like when you're trying to hold on to like when you're trying to hold on to this rope and it's tight and the grip this rope and it's tight and the grip this rope and it's tight and the grip >> it's so much more Exactly. It's >> it's so much more Exactly. It's >> it's so much more Exactly. It's exhausting. It's painful. you'll end up exhausting. It's painful. you'll end up exhausting. It's painful. you'll end up with, you know, scars from it. But you with, you know, scars from it. But you with, you know, scars from it. But you you just pointed out, do you think that you just pointed out, do you think that you just pointed out, do you think that it's almost like it's such a catch 22 it's almost like it's such a catch 22 it's almost like it's such a catch 22 because it's like, do you think you'd be because it's like, do you think you'd be because it's like, do you think you'd be this successful if you hadn't had that? this successful if you hadn't had that? this successful if you hadn't had that? >> No. >> No. >> No. >> Right. So, >> Right. So, >> Right. So, >> I don't think so. And I I like I look at >> I don't think so. And I I like I look at >> I don't think so. And I I like I look at my 20-year-old self and I applaud her my 20-year-old self and I applaud her my 20-year-old self and I applaud her for for for surviving surviving surviving and doing whatever I needed to. and doing whatever I needed to. and doing whatever I needed to. >> Flying all over the world, wanting to >> Flying all over the world, wanting to >> Flying all over the world, wanting to achieve everything, having the achieve everything, having the achieve everything, having the personality trait of of, you know, being personality trait of of, you know, being personality trait of of, you know, being someone who just wanted everything someone who just wanted everything someone who just wanted everything >> and not be apologetic for it. like my >> and not be apologetic for it. like my >> and not be apologetic for it. like my younger self was not apologetic for, younger self was not apologetic for, younger self was not apologetic for, >> you know, wanting a piece of everything, >> you know, wanting a piece of everything, >> you know, wanting a piece of everything, wanting a legacy, wanting to leave wanting a legacy, wanting to leave wanting a legacy, wanting to leave behind something and and I really had to behind something and and I really had to behind something and and I really had to separate myself and like look at her. separate myself and like look at her. separate myself and like look at her. And you know, in fact, when I was And you know, in fact, when I was And you know, in fact, when I was writing my memoir, it was a really writing my memoir, it was a really writing my memoir, it was a really critical um experience for me, which critical um experience for me, which critical um experience for me, which helped me kind of navigate a lot of helped me kind of navigate a lot of helped me kind of navigate a lot of these things like because I was talking these things like because I was talking these things like because I was talking to my friends and family and you know to my friends and family and you know to my friends and family and you know trying to corroborate my own memories trying to corroborate my own memories trying to corroborate my own memories cuz you know memory is a funny thing. cuz you know memory is a funny thing. cuz you know memory is a funny thing. >> Absolutely. >> Absolutely. >> Absolutely. >> What I might remember maybe just my >> What I might remember maybe just my >> What I might remember maybe just my perspective and p perception is perspective and p perception is perspective and p perception is definitely not reality and I used to definitely not reality and I used to definitely not reality and I used to believe believe believe >> 100% that perception is reality. what >> 100% that perception is reality. what >> 100% that perception is reality. what you become is what people believe. And you become is what people believe. And you become is what people believe. And like as time has gone by, I was just like as time has gone by, I was just like as time has gone by, I was just like, man, that girl really had to like, man, that girl really had to like, man, that girl really had to believe what she had to believe to get believe what she had to believe to get believe what she had to believe to get to the other side. to the other side. to the other side. >> And that's okay. >> And that's okay. >> And that's okay. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> And you know, I I see a bravado which I >> And you know, I I see a bravado which I >> And you know, I I see a bravado which I admire today. I maybe don't have it admire today. I maybe don't have it admire today. I maybe don't have it anymore. You know, I'm a little bit more anymore. You know, I'm a little bit more anymore. You know, I'm a little bit more sensible, a little bit more sensible, a little bit more sensible, a little bit more level-headed. Maybe level-headed. Maybe level-headed. Maybe >> still as funny though. Still as funny. >> still as funny though. Still as funny. >> still as funny though. Still as funny. >> Still as funny. The comedy is important. >> Still as funny. The comedy is important. >> Still as funny. The comedy is important. >> Yeah, exactly. >> Yeah, exactly. >> Yeah, exactly. >> Um, gets you through stuff, but you >> Um, gets you through stuff, but you >> Um, gets you through stuff, but you know, like know, like know, like >> it's okay. I think I needed to be and >> it's okay. I think I needed to be and >> it's okay. I think I needed to be and and as we grow older, I think for all of and as we grow older, I think for all of and as we grow older, I think for all of us at whatever age in life you're in, us at whatever age in life you're in, us at whatever age in life you're in, but to be able to forgive yourself for but to be able to forgive yourself for but to be able to forgive yourself for how you were how you were how you were >> when you were young or, >> when you were young or, >> when you were young or, >> you know, we all hold on to so many >> you know, we all hold on to so many >> you know, we all hold on to so many burdens of our past burdens of our past burdens of our past >> and are so hard on ourselves because of >> and are so hard on ourselves because of >> and are so hard on ourselves because of those things. And just I think focusing those things. And just I think focusing those things. And just I think focusing on the future and the present is just a on the future and the present is just a on the future and the present is just a way of kind of letting go of that way of kind of letting go of that way of kind of letting go of that control. control. control. >> Yeah, I really appreciate that >> Yeah, I really appreciate that >> Yeah, I really appreciate that perspective because I feel like so many perspective because I feel like so many perspective because I feel like so many of us as humans when we discover a new of us as humans when we discover a new of us as humans when we discover a new way of living, way of living, way of living, >> we almost disregard shun exactly the >> we almost disregard shun exactly the >> we almost disregard shun exactly the past way of being. And so we're like, past way of being. And so we're like, past way of being. And so we're like, "Oh, now I figured out life. Now I'm at "Oh, now I figured out life. Now I'm at "Oh, now I figured out life. Now I'm at peace." And it's almost like, "Wait a peace." And it's almost like, "Wait a peace." And it's almost like, "Wait a minute. you're forgetting the part that minute. you're forgetting the part that minute. you're forgetting the part that that kid at 20 years old as yourself you that kid at 20 years old as yourself you that kid at 20 years old as yourself you were talking about needed to have that were talking about needed to have that were talking about needed to have that bravado, that holding on tight, that bravado, that holding on tight, that bravado, that holding on tight, that ambition, that to get here. And I love ambition, that to get here. And I love ambition, that to get here. And I love what you're saying because I think what you're saying because I think what you're saying because I think that's really the work that we're all that's really the work that we're all that's really the work that we're all trying to do is accept that all these trying to do is accept that all these trying to do is accept that all these versions of us were just trying the best versions of us were just trying the best versions of us were just trying the best with what they know. with what they know. with what they know. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> And now that we know better, we can do >> And now that we know better, we can do >> And now that we know better, we can do differently and do better. But that it's differently and do better. But that it's differently and do better. But that it's not a judgment or a shunning of that not a judgment or a shunning of that not a judgment or a shunning of that version of ourselves. And as we grow in version of ourselves. And as we grow in version of ourselves. And as we grow in life, we're going to keep changing. Like life, we're going to keep changing. Like life, we're going to keep changing. Like evolution is evolution is evolution is >> Yeah. Hopefully. >> Yeah. Hopefully. >> Yeah. Hopefully. >> Um and even if we don't, that's fine. >> Um and even if we don't, that's fine. >> Um and even if we don't, that's fine. [laughter] [laughter] [laughter] >> That's your individual journey, you >> That's your individual journey, you >> That's your individual journey, you know? And but like Nick's new song, it know? And but like Nick's new song, it know? And but like Nick's new song, it was so profound to me, was so profound to me, was so profound to me, >> gut punch, because that's what it really >> gut punch, because that's what it really >> gut punch, because that's what it really talks about is talks about is talks about is >> when did I get so good at being mean to >> when did I get so good at being mean to >> when did I get so good at being mean to myself, right? myself, right? myself, right? >> And we all do. And if we you catch >> And we all do. And if we you catch >> And we all do. And if we you catch yourself on yourself on yourself on the couple of things which actually the couple of things which actually the couple of things which actually helped me. One is this a constructive helped me. One is this a constructive helped me. One is this a constructive thought. thought. thought. >> So when I'm going down the rabbit hole >> So when I'm going down the rabbit hole >> So when I'm going down the rabbit hole of anything, stress, fear, anxiety, of anything, stress, fear, anxiety, of anything, stress, fear, anxiety, anything, is it a constructive thought? anything, is it a constructive thought? anything, is it a constructive thought? Will it get me somewhere? And if it's Will it get me somewhere? And if it's Will it get me somewhere? And if it's not, it's not meant to be in your head. not, it's not meant to be in your head. not, it's not meant to be in your head. Mh. Mh. Mh. >> And the second thing which has really >> And the second thing which has really >> And the second thing which has really helped me is um thoughts are not facts. helped me is um thoughts are not facts. helped me is um thoughts are not facts. >> So when you're spiraling about something >> So when you're spiraling about something >> So when you're spiraling about something or anxious about something or berating or anxious about something or berating or anxious about something or berating yourself for having done something yourself for having done something yourself for having done something wrong, you have to kind of come back to wrong, you have to kind of come back to wrong, you have to kind of come back to the facts like what are the facts that I the facts like what are the facts that I the facts like what are the facts that I know and then it just takes away the know and then it just takes away the know and then it just takes away the power. power. power. >> Um yeah, those are tools that have >> Um yeah, those are tools that have >> Um yeah, those are tools that have really I think helped me in this new really I think helped me in this new really I think helped me in this new phase. phase. phase. >> I love those zen phase. >> I love those zen phase. >> I love those zen phase. >> Yeah, I love those tools. Yeah, >> Yeah, I love those tools. Yeah, >> Yeah, I love those tools. Yeah, especially that second one because I especially that second one because I especially that second one because I feel like the mind is not a truth feel like the mind is not a truth feel like the mind is not a truth seeker. It's a storyteller and so it seeker. It's a storyteller and so it seeker. It's a storyteller and so it will make up a story and it will create will make up a story and it will create will make up a story and it will create it and it will Yeah. And we'll plaster it and it will Yeah. And we'll plaster it and it will Yeah. And we'll plaster it. It's the biggest fake news in the it. It's the biggest fake news in the it. It's the biggest fake news in the world is is the mind doing its thing and world is is the mind doing its thing and world is is the mind doing its thing and like you just start to believe whatever like you just start to believe whatever like you just start to believe whatever news stories news stories news stories >> especially if we don't talk about it >> especially if we don't talk about it >> especially if we don't talk about it which most of us are trained to not do, which most of us are trained to not do, which most of us are trained to not do, right? Like we've got to be tough. we've right? Like we've got to be tough. we've right? Like we've got to be tough. we've got to like at least when I was growing got to like at least when I was growing got to like at least when I was growing up there was no importance to therapy or up there was no importance to therapy or up there was no importance to therapy or constructive conversation even within constructive conversation even within constructive conversation even within family family family >> it was like you're stronger than that >> it was like you're stronger than that >> it was like you're stronger than that you don't have to feel that way like you don't have to feel that way like you don't have to feel that way like almost dismissive of actual feelings almost dismissive of actual feelings almost dismissive of actual feelings >> and not just my parents that was just >> and not just my parents that was just >> and not just my parents that was just >> the culture of how it was and I feel >> the culture of how it was and I feel >> the culture of how it was and I feel like like like >> um that's a wonderful thing that we've >> um that's a wonderful thing that we've >> um that's a wonderful thing that we've come to a place where we can actually come to a place where we can actually come to a place where we can actually talk about our feelings but you know the talk about our feelings but you know the talk about our feelings but you know the more you keep it in, the more you're not more you keep it in, the more you're not more you keep it in, the more you're not allowed to talk about how you're allowed to talk about how you're allowed to talk about how you're feeling, which is totally different than feeling, which is totally different than feeling, which is totally different than how you should be behaving or what you how you should be behaving or what you how you should be behaving or what you should be doing in a situation. should be doing in a situation. should be doing in a situation. Completely different thing. How you're Completely different thing. How you're Completely different thing. How you're feeling feeling feeling is so crucial to acknowledge and then is so crucial to acknowledge and then is so crucial to acknowledge and then it's easier to kind of move on. And but it's easier to kind of move on. And but it's easier to kind of move on. And but the initial validation you need is I'm the initial validation you need is I'm the initial validation you need is I'm upset about something and it's okay. upset about something and it's okay. upset about something and it's okay. whatever that might stem from. I might whatever that might stem from. I might whatever that might stem from. I might be feeling jealous. I might feel like be feeling jealous. I might feel like be feeling jealous. I might feel like angry that this didn't happen for me or angry that this didn't happen for me or angry that this didn't happen for me or whatever it was or whatever it was or whatever it was or but it's okay to acknowledge that but it's okay to acknowledge that but it's okay to acknowledge that feeling and I find it really beneficial feeling and I find it really beneficial feeling and I find it really beneficial to talk to like my best friend or my to talk to like my best friend or my to talk to like my best friend or my husband or someone. Um this is also a husband or someone. Um this is also a husband or someone. Um this is also a Nick Jonas learning actually. Nick Jonas learning actually. Nick Jonas learning actually. >> Go on. >> Go on. >> Go on. >> Oh man. [laughter] >> Oh man. [laughter] >> Oh man. [laughter] Go on. I just realized early into our Go on. I just realized early into our Go on. I just realized early into our our marriage, we had, you know, argument our marriage, we had, you know, argument our marriage, we had, you know, argument that everyone does when you're just that everyone does when you're just that everyone does when you're just getting to know each other and newly getting to know each other and newly getting to know each other and newly married and married and married and >> we had an argument and being the person >> we had an argument and being the person >> we had an argument and being the person that I am, you know, I'm the storm in that I am, you know, I'm the storm in that I am, you know, I'm the storm in Nick's teacup, that's how we are. Um, or Nick's teacup, that's how we are. Um, or Nick's teacup, that's how we are. Um, or at least we were. I don't know, we're at least we were. I don't know, we're at least we were. I don't know, we're evolving. [laughter] But I was like, evolving. [laughter] But I was like, evolving. [laughter] But I was like, "Well, we need to approach it this way "Well, we need to approach it this way "Well, we need to approach it this way and you know, this is how it'll get and you know, this is how it'll get and you know, this is how it'll get better and solutions and solutions." And better and solutions and solutions." And better and solutions and solutions." And he was like, "Well, we need to talk he was like, "Well, we need to talk he was like, "Well, we need to talk about how we're feeling." And those were about how we're feeling." And those were about how we're feeling." And those were completely two different things. completely two different things. completely two different things. And I didn't know how to do that And I didn't know how to do that And I didn't know how to do that >> or like the fact that I needed to do >> or like the fact that I needed to do >> or like the fact that I needed to do that. that. that. >> And he was like, "Let's talk about how >> And he was like, "Let's talk about how >> And he was like, "Let's talk about how I'm feeling, how you're feeling, and I'm feeling, how you're feeling, and I'm feeling, how you're feeling, and then we'll be able to move on to a then we'll be able to move on to a then we'll be able to move on to a solution." which was so solution." which was so solution." which was so mindblowing to me at that time and mindblowing to me at that time and mindblowing to me at that time and profound honestly profound honestly profound honestly >> and it just changed the way the >> and it just changed the way the >> and it just changed the way the direction of the conversation. It just direction of the conversation. It just direction of the conversation. It just >> it's so healthy to be able to >> it's so healthy to be able to >> it's so healthy to be able to acknowledge, you know, yeah, this made acknowledge, you know, yeah, this made acknowledge, you know, yeah, this made me feel this way. me feel this way. me feel this way. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> And the same honest truth. So then >> And the same honest truth. So then >> And the same honest truth. So then you're like, you're like, you're like, >> oh my gosh, if something I said made >> oh my gosh, if something I said made >> oh my gosh, if something I said made someone feel a certain way, how do I someone feel a certain way, how do I someone feel a certain way, how do I feel about doing that to a loved one? feel about doing that to a loved one? feel about doing that to a loved one? you know, like you know, like you know, like >> if a certain behavior from me or a >> if a certain behavior from me or a >> if a certain behavior from me or a certain behavior from you just makes me certain behavior from you just makes me certain behavior from you just makes me feel not nice, will you keep doing it feel not nice, will you keep doing it feel not nice, will you keep doing it again again again >> knowing that? >> knowing that? >> knowing that? >> So, it was such a big like learning um >> So, it was such a big like learning um >> So, it was such a big like learning um for both of us and you know, we've never for both of us and you know, we've never for both of us and you know, we've never gone back to the storm and the teacup. gone back to the storm and the teacup. gone back to the storm and the teacup. >> Radi and I will still I mean Ry and I >> Radi and I will still I mean Ry and I >> Radi and I will still I mean Ry and I have been together for 13 years now. have been together for 13 years now. have been together for 13 years now. It's our 10 year wedding anniversary It's our 10 year wedding anniversary It's our 10 year wedding anniversary this year. this year. this year. >> Oh, congrats you guys. Decades. >> Oh, congrats you guys. Decades. >> Oh, congrats you guys. Decades. >> Super exciting. And at the same time, my >> Super exciting. And at the same time, my >> Super exciting. And at the same time, my point is, of course, we still have point is, of course, we still have point is, of course, we still have stupid arguments all the time. We've stupid arguments all the time. We've stupid arguments all the time. We've just built tools and techniques over the just built tools and techniques over the just built tools and techniques over the years that have worked for us and years that have worked for us and years that have worked for us and everything that's, you know, that everything that's, you know, that everything that's, you know, that everyone's dealing with. What gave you, everyone's dealing with. What gave you, everyone's dealing with. What gave you, cuz I find this to be one of the biggest cuz I find this to be one of the biggest cuz I find this to be one of the biggest things, at least for me and Radi that I things, at least for me and Radi that I things, at least for me and Radi that I think has been beneficial. What gave you think has been beneficial. What gave you think has been beneficial. What gave you the humility to be able to learn that the humility to be able to learn that the humility to be able to learn that from Nick, right? Because I think in a from Nick, right? Because I think in a from Nick, right? Because I think in a lot of relationships, it's kind of like, lot of relationships, it's kind of like, lot of relationships, it's kind of like, well, you want to do it that way, but well, you want to do it that way, but well, you want to do it that way, but this is the way I do it. So like you're this is the way I do it. So like you're this is the way I do it. So like you're saying, hey, I want to talk about saying, hey, I want to talk about saying, hey, I want to talk about solution. solution. solution. >> I was like that. It happened for a few >> I was like that. It happened for a few >> I was like that. It happened for a few >> a few times and we argued where I was >> a few times and we argued where I was >> a few times and we argued where I was like this is who I am and like this is like this is who I am and like this is like this is who I am and like this is what I know what I know what I know >> and it's worked for me >> and it's worked for me >> and it's worked for me >> and it has worked for me. >> and it has worked for me. >> and it has worked for me. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> But I think I heard him >> But I think I heard him >> But I think I heard him >> maybe for the first time and I don't >> maybe for the first time and I don't >> maybe for the first time and I don't know what maybe I wasn't hearing him. I know what maybe I wasn't hearing him. I know what maybe I wasn't hearing him. I was focused so much on what I was was focused so much on what I was was focused so much on what I was feeling that I couldn't listen feeling that I couldn't listen feeling that I couldn't listen >> to what he was feeling. Mhm. >> to what he was feeling. Mhm. >> to what he was feeling. Mhm. >> Um, and over time, >> Um, and over time, >> Um, and over time, maybe, you know, my husband is, and I've maybe, you know, my husband is, and I've maybe, you know, my husband is, and I've said this so many times, the most said this so many times, the most said this so many times, the most sincere, sincere, sincere, honest person, and that just disarms honest person, and that just disarms honest person, and that just disarms you. you. you. >> Mhm. >> Mhm. >> Mhm. >> So, when he looks at you with those eyes >> So, when he looks at you with those eyes >> So, when he looks at you with those eyes and says, "Let's talk about how we're and says, "Let's talk about how we're and says, "Let's talk about how we're feeling." We're going to talk about how feeling." We're going to talk about how feeling." We're going to talk about how we're feeling. [laughter] we're feeling. [laughter] we're feeling. [laughter] >> Yeah. He has that deep presence, right? >> Yeah. He has that deep presence, right? >> Yeah. He has that deep presence, right? He just like He just like He just like >> the room calms down and >> the room calms down and >> the room calms down and >> it just the he just takes you in that >> it just the he just takes you in that >> it just the he just takes you in that the direction that he wants to. And the direction that he wants to. And the direction that he wants to. And >> um that's the first thing actually that >> um that's the first thing actually that >> um that's the first thing actually that drew me to Nick when we first met is he drew me to Nick when we first met is he drew me to Nick when we first met is he has this quiet confidence has this quiet confidence has this quiet confidence which makes him like a natural leader. which makes him like a natural leader. which makes him like a natural leader. you know, you kind of want to listen to you know, you kind of want to listen to you know, you kind of want to listen to him and hear him out and know that, you him and hear him out and know that, you him and hear him out and know that, you know, he has thought about things and know, he has thought about things and know, he has thought about things and he's not impulsive and um he's decisive, he's not impulsive and um he's decisive, he's not impulsive and um he's decisive, >> but it's just this quiet confidence. It >> but it's just this quiet confidence. It >> but it's just this quiet confidence. It doesn't need, doesn't need, doesn't need, >> you know, to be put on display. >> you know, to be put on display. >> you know, to be put on display. >> Um and that was just beautiful. >> Um and that was just beautiful. >> Um and that was just beautiful. >> Yeah. I mean, that takes a lot from you >> Yeah. I mean, that takes a lot from you >> Yeah. I mean, that takes a lot from you to notice that as well because sometimes to notice that as well because sometimes to notice that as well because sometimes I think quiet confidence is missed. I think quiet confidence is missed. I think quiet confidence is missed. >> Yes. because it's quiet as in it doesn't >> Yes. because it's quiet as in it doesn't >> Yes. because it's quiet as in it doesn't have that flashy it doesn't feel like it have that flashy it doesn't feel like it have that flashy it doesn't feel like it doesn't look like leadership in the old doesn't look like leadership in the old doesn't look like leadership in the old way it's been propagated across the way it's been propagated across the way it's been propagated across the world and then it's easy to miss so it's world and then it's easy to miss so it's world and then it's easy to miss so it's it's also credit to you to be able to it's also credit to you to be able to it's also credit to you to be able to you know at the time to be able to you know at the time to be able to you know at the time to be able to notice that and see the value of it I I notice that and see the value of it I I notice that and see the value of it I I felt the value of it when I've been felt the value of it when I've been felt the value of it when I've been around him and had conversations with around him and had conversations with around him and had conversations with him and him and him and >> it's always been something that has >> it's always been something that has >> it's always been something that has >> it's been something I have see it's been >> it's been something I have see it's been >> it's been something I have see it's been something that I have always been drawn something that I have always been drawn something that I have always been drawn to And again, you know, it's different to And again, you know, it's different to And again, you know, it's different phases, different you have to be phases, different you have to be phases, different you have to be different kinds of confidence. There are different kinds of confidence. There are different kinds of confidence. There are times where you need to be a peacock and times where you need to be a peacock and times where you need to be a peacock and or a porcupine, [laughter] you know, or a porcupine, [laughter] you know, or a porcupine, [laughter] you know, it's fine. You're just it's fine. You're just it's fine. You're just >> That's good. I like I like that. Yeah, I >> That's good. I like I like that. Yeah, I >> That's good. I like I like that. Yeah, I like like like >> you can be either or, but you got to, >> you can be either or, but you got to, >> you can be either or, but you got to, you know, show it off a little bit. you know, show it off a little bit. you know, show it off a little bit. >> Um, and then there are times you don't. >> Um, and then there are times you don't. >> Um, and then there are times you don't. >> It's really up to us to figure out when, >> It's really up to us to figure out when, >> It's really up to us to figure out when, you know, how much you need to turn it you know, how much you need to turn it you know, how much you need to turn it up and how much you need to turn it up and how much you need to turn it up and how much you need to turn it down. But the fact that you can turn it down. But the fact that you can turn it down. But the fact that you can turn it down, that is something like a lot of down, that is something like a lot of down, that is something like a lot of people don't know people don't know people don't know >> and use, you know, confidence doesn't >> and use, you know, confidence doesn't >> and use, you know, confidence doesn't always have to be loud. It doesn't always have to be loud. It doesn't always have to be loud. It doesn't always have to scream. always have to scream. always have to scream. >> It just arrives. >> It just arrives. >> It just arrives. >> And that's the best type. >> And that's the best type. >> And that's the best type. >> Yeah. Yeah. No, I mean I mean obviously >> Yeah. Yeah. No, I mean I mean obviously >> Yeah. Yeah. No, I mean I mean obviously he's he's he's >> you have that you also have that like >> you have that you also have that like >> you have that you also have that like quiet confidence. quiet confidence. quiet confidence. >> Thank you. That's very sweet. That's >> Thank you. That's very sweet. That's >> Thank you. That's very sweet. That's very kind of you. Yeah. I I found it very kind of you. Yeah. I I found it very kind of you. Yeah. I I found it really fascinating is when I first came really fascinating is when I first came really fascinating is when I first came here and I know I don't like this uh here and I know I don't like this uh here and I know I don't like this uh term but people would always be like oh term but people would always be like oh term but people would always be like oh you do motivational speaking which I you do motivational speaking which I you do motivational speaking which I don't consider myself to do because I don't consider myself to do because I don't consider myself to do because I would think about all the motivational would think about all the motivational would think about all the motivational speakers that have come before and speakers that have come before and speakers that have come before and they're like loud they're big they're they're like loud they're big they're they're like loud they're big they're like and I'm like I'm just a little like and I'm like I'm just a little like and I'm like I'm just a little Indian guy you know like I'm like that's Indian guy you know like I'm like that's Indian guy you know like I'm like that's not my that's not my presence and I not my that's not my presence and I not my that's not my presence and I don't I don't think that that's the only don't I don't think that that's the only don't I don't think that that's the only way to be powerful it's a way way to be powerful it's a way way to be powerful it's a way >> um and I and I love >> um and I and I love >> um and I and I love >> if you move people it's powerful. >> if you move people it's powerful. >> if you move people it's powerful. >> Yeah. Yeah. And and and I love what >> Yeah. Yeah. And and and I love what >> Yeah. Yeah. And and and I love what you're saying that it can be done you're saying that it can be done you're saying that it can be done quietly and but it's I find it quietly and but it's I find it quietly and but it's I find it fascinating that you are seeking that fascinating that you are seeking that fascinating that you are seeking that because I think right now when we think because I think right now when we think because I think right now when we think about dating in the modern world when we about dating in the modern world when we about dating in the modern world when we think about whether it's marriage any think about whether it's marriage any think about whether it's marriage any sort of committed monogous relationship sort of committed monogous relationship sort of committed monogous relationship I think what women and men are looking I think what women and men are looking I think what women and men are looking for sometimes we're all so confused for sometimes we're all so confused for sometimes we're all so confused >> because there's so many versions of what >> because there's so many versions of what >> because there's so many versions of what confidence, strength, attractiveness confidence, strength, attractiveness confidence, strength, attractiveness look right for you. look right for you. look right for you. >> Correct. and what's right for you. But >> Correct. and what's right for you. But >> Correct. and what's right for you. But you knew that was right for you because you knew that was right for you because you knew that was right for you because there was something that was guiding you there was something that was guiding you there was something that was guiding you to that. Was that intuition? Was it It to that. Was that intuition? Was it It to that. Was that intuition? Was it It happened so quick. happened so quick. happened so quick. >> Like it was so quick. >> Like it was so quick. >> Like it was so quick. >> And I wondered for the first like year. >> And I wondered for the first like year. >> And I wondered for the first like year. I was like, "What was it?" Cuz I'm not I was like, "What was it?" Cuz I'm not I was like, "What was it?" Cuz I'm not one to jump in full commitment. one to jump in full commitment. one to jump in full commitment. >> It was like immediately >> It was like immediately >> It was like immediately >> 6 months since we first met. We not >> 6 months since we first met. We not >> 6 months since we first met. We not first met, like went out on our first first met, like went out on our first first met, like went out on our first date. We were married. date. We were married. date. We were married. >> Like we were engaged in like 2 months or >> Like we were engaged in like 2 months or >> Like we were engaged in like 2 months or something. something. something. >> It's amazing. >> It's amazing. >> It's amazing. >> It was so quick. But there was no part >> It was so quick. But there was no part >> It was so quick. But there was no part of me that could say no. I was so of me that could say no. I was so of me that could say no. I was so um drawn and compelled by him. um drawn and compelled by him. um drawn and compelled by him. >> And I think that was the one of those >> And I think that was the one of those >> And I think that was the one of those things was his natural leadership. things was his natural leadership. things was his natural leadership. >> And that comes from his quiet >> And that comes from his quiet >> And that comes from his quiet confidence. like he would just hold my confidence. like he would just hold my confidence. like he would just hold my hand and I felt the need to follow him. hand and I felt the need to follow him. hand and I felt the need to follow him. >> I'm the I'm usually the person that >> I'm the I'm usually the person that >> I'm the I'm usually the person that [laughter] [laughter] [laughter] shows people the way, shows people the way, shows people the way, >> you know. So, it was just very >> you know. So, it was just very >> you know. So, it was just very attractive to me to attractive to me to attractive to me to >> be with someone that is so decisive and >> be with someone that is so decisive and >> be with someone that is so decisive and >> um is not afraid to show it >> um is not afraid to show it >> um is not afraid to show it >> and doesn't need to scream off the >> and doesn't need to scream off the >> and doesn't need to scream off the rooftops. Like rooftops. Like rooftops. Like >> what Nick says, he can say to you on >> what Nick says, he can say to you on >> what Nick says, he can say to you on this microphone, he can say at home. this microphone, he can say at home. this microphone, he can say at home. He's just like that's who he is. Um, and He's just like that's who he is. Um, and He's just like that's who he is. Um, and that was very new to me and disarming that was very new to me and disarming that was very new to me and disarming and charming at the same time. and charming at the same time. and charming at the same time. >> I love the way you both speak about each >> I love the way you both speak about each >> I love the way you both speak about each other. Like this is so special. I'm like other. Like this is so special. I'm like other. Like this is so special. I'm like I'm literally going to going to get the I'm literally going to going to get the I'm literally going to going to get the two clips of you both talking about each two clips of you both talking about each two clips of you both talking about each other and put them next to each because other and put them next to each because other and put them next to each because it No, it's wonderful. It's it's so it No, it's wonderful. It's it's so it No, it's wonderful. It's it's so wonderful because wonderful because wonderful because >> it's real. It's not easy. Like I said, >> it's real. It's not easy. Like I said, >> it's real. It's not easy. Like I said, it requires a lot of humility. Even as it requires a lot of humility. Even as it requires a lot of humility. Even as what you just said, I I'm used to being what you just said, I I'm used to being what you just said, I I'm used to being the leader. I'm used to showing the way, the leader. I'm used to showing the way, the leader. I'm used to showing the way, but actually I'm really happy to let but actually I'm really happy to let but actually I'm really happy to let someone else lead sometimes. someone else lead sometimes. someone else lead sometimes. >> Yes, that's what every girl wants >> Yes, that's what every girl wants >> Yes, that's what every girl wants [laughter] is to be with a man competent [laughter] is to be with a man competent [laughter] is to be with a man competent enough that you will trust them to guide enough that you will trust them to guide enough that you will trust them to guide you in the right place because usually, you in the right place because usually, you in the right place because usually, you know, women are really good at you know, women are really good at you know, women are really good at figuring out and and navigating through figuring out and and navigating through figuring out and and navigating through problems. But problems. But problems. But >> um like Nick has this innate wisdom that >> um like Nick has this innate wisdom that >> um like Nick has this innate wisdom that I trust and that I've always trusted. I trust and that I've always trusted. I trust and that I've always trusted. his honesty I've like trusted and I his honesty I've like trusted and I his honesty I've like trusted and I think that was one of the first things think that was one of the first things think that was one of the first things that I was like that I was like that I was like yes yes yes you will be great for life [laughter] you will be great for life [laughter] that's that's it that's that's it >> that's amazing that's so good and I >> that's amazing that's so good and I >> that's amazing that's so good and I loved I saw your um congrats on the loved I saw your um congrats on the loved I saw your um congrats on the variety cover it was amazing and I and I variety cover it was amazing and I and I variety cover it was amazing and I and I read I read the piece before as I was read I read the piece before as I was read I read the piece before as I was preparing for this and I just loved how preparing for this and I just loved how preparing for this and I just loved how you said in the article you were like I you said in the article you were like I you said in the article you were like I just because when I hear you both when just because when I hear you both when just because when I hear you both when I've spent time with you both I've been I've spent time with you both I've been I've spent time with you both I've been to your house, you know, sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp spent time sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp spent time sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp spent time with you over the the years at different with you over the the years at different with you over the the years at different events you see that love you see the way events you see that love you see the way events you see that love you see the way you communicate you see it even when I'm you communicate you see it even when I'm you communicate you see it even when I'm speaking to you both here there's so speaking to you both here there's so speaking to you both here there's so much genuiness and then naturally you much genuiness and then naturally you much genuiness and then naturally you talked about the variety cover with the talked about the variety cover with the talked about the variety cover with the you know the negativity that naturally you know the negativity that naturally you know the negativity that naturally comes with having a relationship in the comes with having a relationship in the comes with having a relationship in the public eye and I love that you said public eye and I love that you said public eye and I love that you said you're like I just don't think about it you're like I just don't think about it you're like I just don't think about it anymore cuz we've been together for 8 anymore cuz we've been together for 8 anymore cuz we've been together for 8 years it's like you know this stuff years it's like you know this stuff years it's like you know this stuff doesn't matter almost anymore doesn't matter almost anymore doesn't matter almost anymore how hard was it to get to that point to how hard was it to get to that point to how hard was it to get to that point to be able to be like you know what now I'm be able to be like you know what now I'm be able to be like you know what now I'm you know we we've We've always been you know we we've We've always been you know we we've We've always been good. We're fine. Like, but how did how good. We're fine. Like, but how did how good. We're fine. Like, but how did how long did it take for you to feel I'm not long did it take for you to feel I'm not long did it take for you to feel I'm not even letting that get to me anymore? even letting that get to me anymore? even letting that get to me anymore? >> I mean, it's hard. I still like will >> I mean, it's hard. I still like will >> I mean, it's hard. I still like will read a comment here or there and I'm read a comment here or there and I'm read a comment here or there and I'm like, why? like, why? like, why? >> Like, what did I do to you? >> Like, what did I do to you? >> Like, what did I do to you? >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Why? Why is it Why' it be so mean? >> Why? Why is it Why' it be so mean? >> Why? Why is it Why' it be so mean? >> Like, I don't even know you. I've never >> Like, I don't even know you. I've never >> Like, I don't even know you. I've never met you. You've seen like some aspects met you. You've seen like some aspects met you. You've seen like some aspects of my life and decided I might be this of my life and decided I might be this of my life and decided I might be this horrible person or we're not right. horrible person or we're not right. horrible person or we're not right. Like, why? Yeah. So, it still sometimes Like, why? Yeah. So, it still sometimes Like, why? Yeah. So, it still sometimes in weak moments will get me um like so in weak moments will get me um like so in weak moments will get me um like so many other things like mean things do. many other things like mean things do. many other things like mean things do. But in general, I think I'm just in a But in general, I think I'm just in a But in general, I think I'm just in a place where I want to focus on the good place where I want to focus on the good place where I want to focus on the good in my life and I feel really blessed to in my life and I feel really blessed to in my life and I feel really blessed to have the good that I do. It's not been have the good that I do. It's not been have the good that I do. It's not been an easy journey and to be in a place an easy journey and to be in a place an easy journey and to be in a place where you know you come out of a storm where you know you come out of a storm where you know you come out of a storm and the sun is shining and you just kind and the sun is shining and you just kind and the sun is shining and you just kind of like take that moment and I feel like of like take that moment and I feel like of like take that moment and I feel like I'm in that moment right now. I'm in that moment right now. I'm in that moment right now. >> Yeah. We we like me and Riley don't >> Yeah. We we like me and Riley don't >> Yeah. We we like me and Riley don't obviously have nearly the amount of obviously have nearly the amount of obviously have nearly the amount of eyeballs that you guys have on us, but eyeballs that you guys have on us, but eyeballs that you guys have on us, but we went through this really interesting we went through this really interesting we went through this really interesting period where we'd been together every period where we'd been together every period where we'd been together every day during the pandemic. And as soon as day during the pandemic. And as soon as day during the pandemic. And as soon as the pandemic was over, Riley was so the pandemic was over, Riley was so the pandemic was over, Riley was so excited to go back home and see her excited to go back home and see her excited to go back home and see her family as as so many people were. family as as so many people were. family as as so many people were. >> And so Riley was spending a lot of time >> And so Riley was spending a lot of time >> And so Riley was spending a lot of time in London after the pandemic because she in London after the pandemic because she in London after the pandemic because she just missed her family. She missed her just missed her family. She missed her just missed her family. She missed her parents. And I did too, but I have work parents. And I did too, but I have work parents. And I did too, but I have work here. I have my team here. I I I've set here. I have my team here. I I I've set here. I have my team here. I I I've set up a life here. And I go back and forth, up a life here. And I go back and forth, up a life here. And I go back and forth, but not as often as she likes to. And it but not as often as she likes to. And it but not as often as she likes to. And it was really fascinating cuz I get a call was really fascinating cuz I get a call was really fascinating cuz I get a call from my publicist one day. She goes, from my publicist one day. She goes, from my publicist one day. She goes, "Jay, I just got a call from this major "Jay, I just got a call from this major "Jay, I just got a call from this major publication, and they've just been publication, and they've just been publication, and they've just been reading on the dark web." I was like, reading on the dark web." I was like, reading on the dark web." I was like, "What is the dark web?" They like, "I've "What is the dark web?" They like, "I've "What is the dark web?" They like, "I've been reading on the dark web that people been reading on the dark web that people been reading on the dark web that people are thinking that you and Radhi are are thinking that you and Radhi are are thinking that you and Radhi are about to, you know, break up and like about to, you know, break up and like about to, you know, break up and like you're not together anymore and that the you're not together anymore and that the you're not together anymore and that the pictures that you're posting are old and pictures that you're posting are old and pictures that you're posting are old and all this stuff." And I was like, we're all this stuff." And I was like, we're all this stuff." And I was like, we're in a really good place. Like, we're in a really good place. Like, we're in a really good place. Like, we're totally happy. Actually, the pandemic totally happy. Actually, the pandemic totally happy. Actually, the pandemic was amazing for us because we spent was amazing for us because we spent was amazing for us because we spent every day together and fell more in love every day together and fell more in love every day together and fell more in love with each other, which was such a with each other, which was such a with each other, which was such a blessing to have that. And [snorts] then blessing to have that. And [snorts] then blessing to have that. And [snorts] then I we've always had this communication, I we've always had this communication, I we've always had this communication, me and Radhi, where London is such an me and Radhi, where London is such an me and Radhi, where London is such an important part of our identity, our important part of our identity, our important part of our identity, our family, our niece and nephew. And so, family, our niece and nephew. And so, family, our niece and nephew. And so, we've always tried to live this LA we've always tried to live this LA we've always tried to live this LA London life as much as we can. London life as much as we can. London life as much as we can. >> Not easy. >> Not easy. >> Not easy. >> It's not easy at all. So, Radi will go >> It's not easy at all. So, Radi will go >> It's not easy at all. So, Radi will go back a lot more often. I'll I'll run in back a lot more often. I'll I'll run in back a lot more often. I'll I'll run in and out whenever I can. And and it was and out whenever I can. And and it was and out whenever I can. And and it was just fascinating to me that like that just fascinating to me that like that just fascinating to me that like that was even being talked about and and she was even being talked about and and she was even being talked about and and she was like, "Yeah, there's loads of people was like, "Yeah, there's loads of people was like, "Yeah, there's loads of people just wondering whether you guys are just wondering whether you guys are just wondering whether you guys are still together, still in love, still together, still in love, still together, still in love, whatever." And and it was just such a whatever." And and it was just such a whatever." And and it was just such a and I remember having the conversation and I remember having the conversation and I remember having the conversation with Radhi and laughing at it obviously with Radhi and laughing at it obviously with Radhi and laughing at it obviously because we know what we're doing. But I because we know what we're doing. But I because we know what we're doing. But I was like, "Wow, like where do where do was like, "Wow, like where do where do was like, "Wow, like where do where do people even invent this stuff?" And then people even invent this stuff?" And then people even invent this stuff?" And then how does it go from we're living in how does it go from we're living in how does it go from we're living in different countries during a certain different countries during a certain different countries during a certain period of time with with context, but period of time with with context, but period of time with with context, but you take that to be we don't love each you take that to be we don't love each you take that to be we don't love each other anymore, don't want to be other anymore, don't want to be other anymore, don't want to be together. And I was like, "Wow." like together. And I was like, "Wow." like together. And I was like, "Wow." like and and like I said, it's nowhere near and and like I said, it's nowhere near and and like I said, it's nowhere near compared to the eyeballs that you and compared to the eyeballs that you and compared to the eyeballs that you and Nick have on you. So, it's just such a Nick have on you. So, it's just such a Nick have on you. So, it's just such a fascinating fascinating fascinating >> and I struggled with that and Riley >> and I struggled with that and Riley >> and I struggled with that and Riley struggled with it where she got to the struggled with it where she got to the struggled with it where she got to the point where she was like, you know what, point where she was like, you know what, point where she was like, you know what, I don't want to talk about our I don't want to talk about our I don't want to talk about our relationship publicly anymore. Like, relationship publicly anymore. Like, relationship publicly anymore. Like, that's where she got to. She was like, I that's where she got to. She was like, I that's where she got to. She was like, I just don't want to talk about it because just don't want to talk about it because just don't want to talk about it because I don't like all these opinions and I I don't like all these opinions and I I don't like all these opinions and I don't, you know, it really affected her. don't, you know, it really affected her. don't, you know, it really affected her. >> Well, I I have a couple of thoughts on >> Well, I I have a couple of thoughts on >> Well, I I have a couple of thoughts on how I how I how I kind of navigated it. kind of navigated it. kind of navigated it. >> Yeah. One is we are living in a time and >> Yeah. One is we are living in a time and >> Yeah. One is we are living in a time and a period where we get to see and read a period where we get to see and read a period where we get to see and read the opinions that people have of us, the opinions that people have of us, the opinions that people have of us, right? Like before social media back in right? Like before social media back in right? Like before social media back in the day, you think the aunties weren't the day, you think the aunties weren't the day, you think the aunties weren't talking in the kitchen. [laughter] talking in the kitchen. [laughter] talking in the kitchen. [laughter] >> Everyone was talking. >> Everyone was talking. >> Everyone was talking. >> They were definitely That's brilliant. >> They were definitely That's brilliant. >> They were definitely That's brilliant. >> Everyone was talking about everything. >> Everyone was talking about everything. >> Everyone was talking about everything. We just didn't hear about it. We just didn't hear about it. We just didn't hear about it. >> Absolutely. >> Absolutely. >> Absolutely. >> So, >> So, >> So, nothing's really changed. Yeah, nothing's really changed. Yeah, nothing's really changed. Yeah, >> it's just how much information we are >> it's just how much information we are >> it's just how much information we are >> absorbing. So take that power away that >> absorbing. So take that power away that >> absorbing. So take that power away that this is all the same people that would this is all the same people that would this is all the same people that would have talked about you guys even 40 years have talked about you guys even 40 years have talked about you guys even 40 years ago if you were in the position that ago if you were in the position that ago if you were in the position that you're in. That's kind of the gig. When you're in. That's kind of the gig. When you're in. That's kind of the gig. When you become a public person, people will you become a public person, people will you become a public person, people will have an opinion on you. So protect your have an opinion on you. So protect your have an opinion on you. So protect your sanity by understanding that this is sanity by understanding that this is sanity by understanding that this is this comes with the job. It comes with this comes with the job. It comes with this comes with the job. It comes with the territory, right? the territory, right? the territory, right? So that's one. Of course, it can still So that's one. Of course, it can still So that's one. Of course, it can still affect you and you know um hurt because affect you and you know um hurt because affect you and you know um hurt because it comes across your timeline and you're it comes across your timeline and you're it comes across your timeline and you're like why? like why? like why? >> Like what's the need of it? The second >> Like what's the need of it? The second >> Like what's the need of it? The second thing that I really strongly believe thing that I really strongly believe thing that I really strongly believe it's no one's business honestly it's no one's business honestly it's no one's business honestly >> and that's okay. Like you share as much >> and that's okay. Like you share as much >> and that's okay. Like you share as much as you need to and what feels right. And as you need to and what feels right. And as you need to and what feels right. And even within our families, right? Like if even within our families, right? Like if even within our families, right? Like if you're going for especially Indian you're going for especially Indian you're going for especially Indian families, everyone's in your business. families, everyone's in your business. families, everyone's in your business. Everyone wants to know all the things. Everyone wants to know all the things. Everyone wants to know all the things. >> But even there, I believe that if it's >> But even there, I believe that if it's >> But even there, I believe that if it's not your business, I don't need to tell not your business, I don't need to tell not your business, I don't need to tell you. you. you. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> And so protect protecting ourselves from >> And so protect protecting ourselves from >> And so protect protecting ourselves from the cacophony of opinions is really the cacophony of opinions is really the cacophony of opinions is really important. And that's just by like important. And that's just by like important. And that's just by like you've got to do the self-t talk you've got to do the self-t talk you've got to do the self-t talk >> and be like, do I want to react to this? >> and be like, do I want to react to this? >> and be like, do I want to react to this? Is this a constructive thought? Like Is this a constructive thought? Like Is this a constructive thought? Like just just just >> you got to kind of Yeah. You got to nip >> you got to kind of Yeah. You got to nip >> you got to kind of Yeah. You got to nip it in the bud and be like that's not it in the bud and be like that's not it in the bud and be like that's not something I need to waste my time on. something I need to waste my time on. something I need to waste my time on. >> Yeah. I think me and Radi made a pact >> Yeah. I think me and Radi made a pact >> Yeah. I think me and Radi made a pact early where even with the family piece, early where even with the family piece, early where even with the family piece, it was like we solve our problems it was like we solve our problems it was like we solve our problems together. together. together. >> Yeah. Exactly. >> Yeah. Exactly. >> Yeah. Exactly. >> And if we need to communicate with >> And if we need to communicate with >> And if we need to communicate with either of our parents, you communicate either of our parents, you communicate either of our parents, you communicate with your parents, I communicate with with your parents, I communicate with with your parents, I communicate with mine because that's the open line of mine because that's the open line of mine because that's the open line of communication that has been there for communication that has been there for communication that has been there for >> it'll be honest and it'll be, >> it'll be honest and it'll be, >> it'll be honest and it'll be, >> you know, it'll be real. >> you know, it'll be real. >> you know, it'll be real. >> Yeah. whatever your version of that is >> Yeah. whatever your version of that is >> Yeah. whatever your version of that is is I think like just is I think like just is I think like just the public scrutiny um and it's for the public scrutiny um and it's for the public scrutiny um and it's for everyone now like there are comments on everyone now like there are comments on everyone now like there are comments on everyone's socials right like not just everyone's socials right like not just everyone's socials right like not just people who are in the public eye like people who are in the public eye like people who are in the public eye like content creators anyone who's out there content creators anyone who's out there content creators anyone who's out there >> yes >> yes >> yes >> you have comments so it's not just a >> you have comments so it's not just a >> you have comments so it's not just a problem of public people anymore that's problem of public people anymore that's problem of public people anymore that's just the nature of the world we're just the nature of the world we're just the nature of the world we're living in correct living in correct living in correct >> so for everyone who gets mean comments >> so for everyone who gets mean comments >> so for everyone who gets mean comments on your comments or on your Instagram or on your comments or on your Instagram or on your comments or on your Instagram or Tik Tok or whatever like really Tik Tok or whatever like really Tik Tok or whatever like really recognizing and maybe young people don't recognizing and maybe young people don't recognizing and maybe young people don't even remember this but like people even remember this but like people even remember this but like people always talked. always talked. always talked. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> There's a Hindi song >> which means people have to say something >> which means people have to say something so they're constantly going to say so they're constantly going to say so they're constantly going to say something. something. something. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> And that's just human beings. So like >> And that's just human beings. So like >> And that's just human beings. So like just a pinch of salt sometimes is just a pinch of salt sometimes is just a pinch of salt sometimes is important while reading that stuff. important while reading that stuff. important while reading that stuff. >> Yeah. Well said. Good advice. I was >> Yeah. Well said. Good advice. I was >> Yeah. Well said. Good advice. I was thinking I want to shift gears because I thinking I want to shift gears because I thinking I want to shift gears because I know we can talk about Nick the whole know we can talk about Nick the whole know we can talk about Nick the whole whole podcast. So, we'll get back we'll whole podcast. So, we'll get back we'll whole podcast. So, we'll get back we'll get back to No, no, no. We'll [laughter] get back to No, no, no. We'll [laughter] get back to No, no, no. We'll [laughter] get back. He did he did the same. So, get back. He did he did the same. So, get back. He did he did the same. So, it's fine. We'll get we'll get back to it's fine. We'll get we'll get back to it's fine. We'll get we'll get back to Nick and I want to talk about family as Nick and I want to talk about family as Nick and I want to talk about family as well. But, I want to shift gears to well. But, I want to shift gears to well. But, I want to shift gears to something you said earlier. You said to something you said earlier. You said to something you said earlier. You said to me that actually this is the first time me that actually this is the first time me that actually this is the first time where you're actually using agency to to where you're actually using agency to to where you're actually using agency to to be in the choice of what speed you're be in the choice of what speed you're be in the choice of what speed you're moving at. And before there was almost moving at. And before there was almost moving at. And before there was almost this pivot that felt pushed on you or or this pivot that felt pushed on you or or this pivot that felt pushed on you or or just felt like the way you had to go. just felt like the way you had to go. just felt like the way you had to go. And I was reading online about a um And I was reading online about a um And I was reading online about a um there was a director in Bollywood who there was a director in Bollywood who there was a director in Bollywood who was saying that Priyanka was treated was saying that Priyanka was treated was saying that Priyanka was treated badly. She was like she was treated badly. She was like she was treated badly. She was like she was treated badly in Bollywood. We pushed her out badly in Bollywood. We pushed her out badly in Bollywood. We pushed her out was was his language. And and I was was was his language. And and I was was was his language. And and I was like, I don't know how that feels when like, I don't know how that feels when like, I don't know how that feels when when you're at the top, when you've won, when you're at the top, when you've won, when you're at the top, when you've won, like you're one of the most iconic like you're one of the most iconic like you're one of the most iconic people we've ever had in the industry in people we've ever had in the industry in people we've ever had in the industry in Bollywood without a doubt. Like Bollywood without a doubt. Like Bollywood without a doubt. Like celebrated, done every major movie, celebrated, done every major movie, celebrated, done every major movie, worked with, you know, every major worked with, you know, every major worked with, you know, every major director, every major person in in the director, every major person in in the director, every major person in in the industry. To me, it looked like a win, industry. To me, it looked like a win, industry. To me, it looked like a win, but that's what I mean, people are but that's what I mean, people are but that's what I mean, people are almost coming out and confessing and almost coming out and confessing and almost coming out and confessing and feeling like, "No, we treated her badly. feeling like, "No, we treated her badly. feeling like, "No, we treated her badly. We pushed her out." How do you feel We pushed her out." How do you feel We pushed her out." How do you feel about that when you hear that? I have about that when you hear that? I have about that when you hear that? I have like conflicting thoughts with all of like conflicting thoughts with all of like conflicting thoughts with all of that because I feel like surviving in that because I feel like surviving in that because I feel like surviving in the movie industry is tough for the movie industry is tough for the movie industry is tough for everyone. It's it's not an easy place. everyone. It's it's not an easy place. everyone. It's it's not an easy place. Um it's political. Um it's political. Um it's political. It's networky. It's networky. It's networky. It's um you know moment driven. It's um you know moment driven. It's um you know moment driven. If it's the moment you're the man of the If it's the moment you're the man of the If it's the moment you're the man of the moment or the woman of the moment and moment or the woman of the moment and moment or the woman of the moment and then the moment's gone, it's somebody then the moment's gone, it's somebody then the moment's gone, it's somebody else's moment. So it's fleeting. So I am else's moment. So it's fleeting. So I am else's moment. So it's fleeting. So I am pragmatic enough to recognize that I pragmatic enough to recognize that I pragmatic enough to recognize that I feel like everybody has their struggles feel like everybody has their struggles feel like everybody has their struggles because of their choices. I did feel because of their choices. I did feel because of their choices. I did feel like I was in a place where I felt um like I was in a place where I felt um like I was in a place where I felt um cornered where work was limited and in cornered where work was limited and in cornered where work was limited and in order to survive emotionally, mentally, order to survive emotionally, mentally, order to survive emotionally, mentally, physically um I just needed to move and physically um I just needed to move and physically um I just needed to move and that's always been my answer. I'm not that's always been my answer. I'm not that's always been my answer. I'm not someone who stays stagnant. I need someone who stays stagnant. I need someone who stays stagnant. I need movement to solve my problems. Um and movement to solve my problems. Um and movement to solve my problems. Um and this time it just happened to be across this time it just happened to be across this time it just happened to be across continents, you know, continents, you know, continents, you know, >> the hardest thing to do completely move >> the hardest thing to do completely move >> the hardest thing to do completely move like completely new country. like completely new country. like completely new country. >> But um >> But um >> But um >> I was talking to you about the universe, >> I was talking to you about the universe, >> I was talking to you about the universe, right? So I was in this place where I right? So I was in this place where I right? So I was in this place where I was doing I was doing good work, but I was doing I was doing good work, but I was doing I was doing good work, but I kind of didn't see myself kind of didn't see myself kind of didn't see myself >> um like I told you, I look 5 seconds >> um like I told you, I look 5 seconds >> um like I told you, I look 5 seconds ahead of me. I'm like always thinking ahead of me. I'm like always thinking ahead of me. I'm like always thinking ahead is my nature. So, I just didn't ahead is my nature. So, I just didn't ahead is my nature. So, I just didn't see longevity the way I wanted see longevity the way I wanted see longevity the way I wanted >> it in um in my situation at that time. >> it in um in my situation at that time. >> it in um in my situation at that time. Um and I'm honest about who I am. So, Um and I'm honest about who I am. So, Um and I'm honest about who I am. So, you know, I was never afraid of living you know, I was never afraid of living you know, I was never afraid of living my truth, but that's what it ended up my truth, but that's what it ended up my truth, but that's what it ended up being. I felt cornered. And um Anula being. I felt cornered. And um Anula being. I felt cornered. And um Anula who's our common friend who's for people who's our common friend who's for people who's our common friend who's for people who don't know now my manager but at who don't know now my manager but at who don't know now my manager but at that time she ran DIY hits which was um that time she ran DIY hits which was um that time she ran DIY hits which was um uh a joint venture with Innercope uh a joint venture with Innercope uh a joint venture with Innercope Records which you know shown the light Records which you know shown the light Records which you know shown the light on um Indian artists and South Asian on um Indian artists and South Asian on um Indian artists and South Asian artists and brought them over to America artists and brought them over to America artists and brought them over to America and she saw an old movie of mine at her and she saw an old movie of mine at her and she saw an old movie of mine at her mom's house. It was called Bluff Master mom's house. It was called Bluff Master mom's house. It was called Bluff Master >> and she was like working with Jimmy Ivan >> and she was like working with Jimmy Ivan >> and she was like working with Jimmy Ivan at that time. They had just done the at that time. They had just done the at that time. They had just done the Pussycat Dolls version of um J. Yeah. Pussycat Dolls version of um J. Yeah. Pussycat Dolls version of um J. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So there was like that um Yeah. Yeah. So there was like that um Yeah. Yeah. So there was like that um you know just cross pollination I like you know just cross pollination I like you know just cross pollination I like to use that word of cultures within to use that word of cultures within to use that word of cultures within music that was happening music that was happening music that was happening >> and she reached out to me you know I >> and she reached out to me you know I >> and she reached out to me you know I heard you can sing. I mean that's I can heard you can sing. I mean that's I can heard you can sing. I mean that's I can carry a tune carry a tune carry a tune with a little bit of help but um not with a little bit of help but um not with a little bit of help but um not like I used to enjoy it. I used to go like I used to enjoy it. I used to go like I used to enjoy it. I used to go into the studio sing with my friends. into the studio sing with my friends. into the studio sing with my friends. You know how in Bollywood movies we have You know how in Bollywood movies we have You know how in Bollywood movies we have um music as a you know we have a um music as a you know we have a um music as a you know we have a soundtrack to every movie and that's soundtrack to every movie and that's soundtrack to every movie and that's usually recorded with um you know with u usually recorded with um you know with u usually recorded with um you know with u music producers. And so I used to go in music producers. And so I used to go in music producers. And so I used to go in for those sessions just because I loved for those sessions just because I loved for those sessions just because I loved seeing how music was made. And so seeing how music was made. And so seeing how music was made. And so sometimes I would take the mic and just sometimes I would take the mic and just sometimes I would take the mic and just sing or whatever. So I had a few songs sing or whatever. So I had a few songs sing or whatever. So I had a few songs out there floating around. And um I out there floating around. And um I out there floating around. And um I don't know, she got her hands on them don't know, she got her hands on them don't know, she got her hands on them and she was like, you know, let's make and she was like, you know, let's make and she was like, you know, let's make you a pop star. And because I was you a pop star. And because I was you a pop star. And because I was feeling it was like a the universe kind feeling it was like a the universe kind feeling it was like a the universe kind of just timed itself together. I was of just timed itself together. I was of just timed itself together. I was feeling very limited in my work in Hindi feeling very limited in my work in Hindi feeling very limited in my work in Hindi movies. I was feeling kind of like I movies. I was feeling kind of like I movies. I was feeling kind of like I don't have a direction to go on and this don't have a direction to go on and this don't have a direction to go on and this was like an olive branch and I I'm I was like an olive branch and I I'm I was like an olive branch and I I'm I don't get starruck but musicians like don't get starruck but musicians like don't get starruck but musicians like get me. [snorts] get me. [snorts] get me. [snorts] Being able to be on that stage and Being able to be on that stage and Being able to be on that stage and command command command with a live microphone so many people is with a live microphone so many people is with a live microphone so many people is incredible to me. So I was just blown incredible to me. So I was just blown incredible to me. So I was just blown away by you know being flown to London away by you know being flown to London away by you know being flown to London and then from there with being signed to and then from there with being signed to and then from there with being signed to Universal from there coming to LA and Universal from there coming to LA and Universal from there coming to LA and you know being in the studio with Will I you know being in the studio with Will I you know being in the studio with Will I Am and Pitbull and just Chain Smokers Am and Pitbull and just Chain Smokers Am and Pitbull and just Chain Smokers and work with Red One and you know I met and work with Red One and you know I met and work with Red One and you know I met the most incredible people um during the most incredible people um during the most incredible people um during this 2-year pop star era [laughter] of this 2-year pop star era [laughter] of this 2-year pop star era [laughter] of mine of such a welcome change. It was a mine of such a welcome change. It was a mine of such a welcome change. It was a breath of fresh air. And this is behind breath of fresh air. And this is behind breath of fresh air. And this is behind the lens like what I was feeling. the lens like what I was feeling. the lens like what I was feeling. >> I was feeling >> I was feeling >> I was feeling like I was drowning and I was suddenly like I was drowning and I was suddenly like I was drowning and I was suddenly pulled out. pulled out. pulled out. >> And >> And >> And >> wow, >> wow, >> wow, >> I could breathe and I didn't know if >> I could breathe and I didn't know if >> I could breathe and I didn't know if this would stick or not, but I was just this would stick or not, but I was just this would stick or not, but I was just breathing. breathing. breathing. >> And >> And >> And >> wow, >> wow, >> wow, >> I was breathing in excellent company. I >> I was breathing in excellent company. I >> I was breathing in excellent company. I was making music that I didn't know how was making music that I didn't know how was making music that I didn't know how to make. But um you know there was faith to make. But um you know there was faith to make. But um you know there was faith in something in me and um I have to give in something in me and um I have to give in something in me and um I have to give credit to both Anula and Jimmy I for credit to both Anula and Jimmy I for credit to both Anula and Jimmy I for seeing something that I didn't see. I seeing something that I didn't see. I seeing something that I didn't see. I was honestly just breathing at that was honestly just breathing at that was honestly just breathing at that point and really happy to be given an point and really happy to be given an point and really happy to be given an opportunity to work with some of these opportunity to work with some of these opportunity to work with some of these incredible artists that I had admired incredible artists that I had admired incredible artists that I had admired for so long. I mean for so long. I mean for so long. I mean I spent my 30th birthday with Bono. How I spent my 30th birthday with Bono. How I spent my 30th birthday with Bono. How many people can say that? Like it was many people can say that? Like it was many people can say that? Like it was just so cool to be in that rarified air just so cool to be in that rarified air just so cool to be in that rarified air of just artists who make music with a of just artists who make music with a of just artists who make music with a guitar and you know songs that come into guitar and you know songs that come into guitar and you know songs that come into their mind and I was just inspired and their mind and I was just inspired and their mind and I was just inspired and um feeling a sense of being alive uh um feeling a sense of being alive uh um feeling a sense of being alive uh creatively um and emotionally. creatively um and emotionally. creatively um and emotionally. >> I lost my dad within that phase as well >> I lost my dad within that phase as well >> I lost my dad within that phase as well which was a really big hit for me. So it which was a really big hit for me. So it which was a really big hit for me. So it was a tough like period of 5 6 years, a was a tough like period of 5 6 years, a was a tough like period of 5 6 years, a lot of change. Uh a lot of full stops, lot of change. Uh a lot of full stops, lot of change. Uh a lot of full stops, you know, a lot of leaving feelings and you know, a lot of leaving feelings and you know, a lot of leaving feelings and things behind and trying to come out on things behind and trying to come out on things behind and trying to come out on the other side of it. And I was alone the other side of it. And I was alone the other side of it. And I was alone because I had moved countries. So that because I had moved countries. So that because I had moved countries. So that was extra layer of tough. I didn't was extra layer of tough. I didn't was extra layer of tough. I didn't really have a lot of friends. I have a really have a lot of friends. I have a really have a lot of friends. I have a lot of family in America, but everyone's lot of family in America, but everyone's lot of family in America, but everyone's really busy with their lives. So um really busy with their lives. So um really busy with their lives. So um between I was by coastal between LA and between I was by coastal between LA and between I was by coastal between LA and New York. Um and you know hotel rooms New York. Um and you know hotel rooms New York. Um and you know hotel rooms get lonely and so I moved into an get lonely and so I moved into an get lonely and so I moved into an apartment and you know I after the music apartment and you know I after the music apartment and you know I after the music phase was over I kind of was like after phase was over I kind of was like after phase was over I kind of was like after four songs out there I was like I don't four songs out there I was like I don't four songs out there I was like I don't know if this is you know I'm as good at know if this is you know I'm as good at know if this is you know I'm as good at this [laughter] this [laughter] this [laughter] as I would [clears throat] like to. M as I would [clears throat] like to. M as I would [clears throat] like to. M >> and then Jimmy suggested that I find >> and then Jimmy suggested that I find >> and then Jimmy suggested that I find representation in acting and I did and representation in acting and I did and representation in acting and I did and um that's how it started you know I got um that's how it started you know I got um that's how it started you know I got Quantico which was Quantico which was Quantico which was >> after a bunch of auditions which was >> after a bunch of auditions which was >> after a bunch of auditions which was also one of my first auditions in like also one of my first auditions in like also one of my first auditions in like years years years >> terrifying in itself the whole process >> terrifying in itself the whole process >> terrifying in itself the whole process cuz when I was working in Bollywood I'd cuz when I was working in Bollywood I'd cuz when I was working in Bollywood I'd reached a point where you know people reached a point where you know people reached a point where you know people knew my work so I didn't knew my work so I didn't knew my work so I didn't >> you know I'd get direct offers >> you know I'd get direct offers >> you know I'd get direct offers [laughter] [laughter] [laughter] I just you know the whole it's so crazy I just you know the whole it's so crazy I just you know the whole it's so crazy that as actors we do this and you know that as actors we do this and you know that as actors we do this and you know rejection is such a large part of part rejection is such a large part of part rejection is such a large part of part of it too but that first time when I of it too but that first time when I of it too but that first time when I walked into that um audition hall and walked into that um audition hall and walked into that um audition hall and there were all of these girls on a chair there were all of these girls on a chair there were all of these girls on a chair and I realized they were all here for and I realized they were all here for and I realized they were all here for the same part the same part the same part was a crazy feeling and [snorts] and was a crazy feeling and [snorts] and was a crazy feeling and [snorts] and does everyone like look similar? Is that does everyone like look similar? Is that does everyone like look similar? Is that the goal or like the goal or like the goal or like >> or or was that different because you're >> or or was that different because you're >> or or was that different because you're doing it here? doing it here? doing it here? >> It was different for that show because >> It was different for that show because >> It was different for that show because there were there were there were >> it was written for an American girl >> it was written for an American girl >> it was written for an American girl >> that show which I clearly wasn't >> that show which I clearly wasn't >> that show which I clearly wasn't >> but I'm an actor and I was like >> but I'm an actor and I was like >> but I'm an actor and I was like >> yeah I can study an accent and I can I >> yeah I can study an accent and I can I >> yeah I can study an accent and I can I went to school here. I'm I'm not went to school here. I'm I'm not went to school here. I'm I'm not unfamiliar with unfamiliar with unfamiliar with >> the states of course. So I, you know, >> the states of course. So I, you know, >> the states of course. So I, you know, worked on on being American because worked on on being American because worked on on being American because she's was an FBI agent and, you know, she's was an FBI agent and, you know, she's was an FBI agent and, you know, um, so I I worked a lot on that. I um, so I I worked a lot on that. I um, so I I worked a lot on that. I worked with acting coaches. I really worked with acting coaches. I really worked with acting coaches. I really wanted to see if I was built for wanted to see if I was built for wanted to see if I was built for America like cuz it takes a different America like cuz it takes a different America like cuz it takes a different gears almost gears almost gears almost >> for anyone who's familiar with, >> for anyone who's familiar with, >> for anyone who's familiar with, >> you know, Bollywood and Hollywood. It's >> you know, Bollywood and Hollywood. It's >> you know, Bollywood and Hollywood. It's just the industries are it's different. just the industries are it's different. just the industries are it's different. So the first few times for me I I spent So the first few times for me I I spent So the first few times for me I I spent like about 6 months in LA. I was also like about 6 months in LA. I was also like about 6 months in LA. I was also finishing a movie back in India at that finishing a movie back in India at that finishing a movie back in India at that time called Baji Ramastani. time called Baji Ramastani. time called Baji Ramastani. >> So I was flying back and forth a lot and >> So I was flying back and forth a lot and >> So I was flying back and forth a lot and um I just was like do I do I have what um I just was like do I do I have what um I just was like do I do I have what it takes first and foremost to do that? it takes first and foremost to do that? it takes first and foremost to do that? and which meant kind of erasing my and which meant kind of erasing my and which meant kind of erasing my accomplishments up until now. When I accomplishments up until now. When I accomplishments up until now. When I walked into a room and I was, it took me walked into a room and I was, it took me walked into a room and I was, it took me a little bit of talking to myself to do a little bit of talking to myself to do a little bit of talking to myself to do that. I was like, "Okay, what are my that. I was like, "Okay, what are my that. I was like, "Okay, what are my choices?" My choices are to do limited choices?" My choices are to do limited choices?" My choices are to do limited parts and see what that'll turn out to parts and see what that'll turn out to parts and see what that'll turn out to be like to do music which I kind of be like to do music which I kind of be like to do music which I kind of thought I was mediocre in or to try and thought I was mediocre in or to try and thought I was mediocre in or to try and work in a completely new industry which work in a completely new industry which work in a completely new industry which um you know you have to start all the um you know you have to start all the um you know you have to start all the way way way >> all the way at the bottom again >> all the way at the bottom again >> all the way at the bottom again >> at the bottom again >> at the bottom again >> at the bottom again >> and that's all right cuz the edge that I >> and that's all right cuz the edge that I >> and that's all right cuz the edge that I had is I was not new. had is I was not new. had is I was not new. >> Mhm. So, I knew my job. >> Mhm. So, I knew my job. >> Mhm. So, I knew my job. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> I knew what it's like to be on a big >> I knew what it's like to be on a big >> I knew what it's like to be on a big budget movie. I knew what it likes what budget movie. I knew what it likes what budget movie. I knew what it likes what it's like to be the lead of a part like it's like to be the lead of a part like it's like to be the lead of a part like >> to hold the attention on screen to >> to hold the attention on screen to >> to hold the attention on screen to >> or even stand on your mark, say the >> or even stand on your mark, say the >> or even stand on your mark, say the lines, know where the lights, know like lines, know where the lights, know like lines, know where the lights, know like I know the profession. I know my craft. I know the profession. I know my craft. I know the profession. I know my craft. >> So, that's the edge that I had of course >> So, that's the edge that I had of course >> So, that's the edge that I had of course >> over you know um like someone newer who >> over you know um like someone newer who >> over you know um like someone newer who was coming into that space and I think was coming into that space and I think was coming into that space and I think that's what really helped me is I that's what really helped me is I that's what really helped me is I focused on my craft. I focused on the focused on my craft. I focused on the focused on my craft. I focused on the job. I took away the noise of, you know, job. I took away the noise of, you know, job. I took away the noise of, you know, well, you've done like 50 movies in well, you've done like 50 movies in well, you've done like 50 movies in India or you've been on the cover of India or you've been on the cover of India or you've been on the cover of this magazine. Why should you like that this magazine. Why should you like that this magazine. Why should you like that thing that we do to ourselves which is, thing that we do to ourselves which is, thing that we do to ourselves which is, you know, you can get in your own way. you know, you can get in your own way. you know, you can get in your own way. >> I choose to >> I choose to >> I choose to >> I chose to get out of my way. >> I chose to get out of my way. >> I chose to get out of my way. >> Wow. >> Wow. >> Wow. >> And I don't know which part of my >> And I don't know which part of my >> And I don't know which part of my survival survival survival helped me do that. I I really don't helped me do that. I I really don't helped me do that. I I really don't know. It was a really dark period in my know. It was a really dark period in my know. It was a really dark period in my life, [gasps] life, [gasps] life, [gasps] you know, moving you know, moving you know, moving here, being alone, losing my dad, losing here, being alone, losing my dad, losing here, being alone, losing my dad, losing like friendships and, you know, my like friendships and, you know, my like friendships and, you know, my family. My mom was not here, nobody family. My mom was not here, nobody family. My mom was not here, nobody >> and belonging in a rented apartment, >> and belonging in a rented apartment, >> and belonging in a rented apartment, not sure if I should live in New York or not sure if I should live in New York or not sure if I should live in New York or live in Mumbai, living out of suitcases live in Mumbai, living out of suitcases live in Mumbai, living out of suitcases for a couple like for many years. Um, it for a couple like for many years. Um, it for a couple like for many years. Um, it was just tough and I don't know, I just was just tough and I don't know, I just was just tough and I don't know, I just I was like, I need to get out of my way. I was like, I need to get out of my way. I was like, I need to get out of my way. I need something to give. I need I need something to give. I need I need something to give. I need something to work. And it was many, many something to work. And it was many, many something to work. And it was many, many years of [gasps] years of [gasps] years of [gasps] trying to figure out what'll stick where trying to figure out what'll stick where trying to figure out what'll stick where I just like put my head down and I was I just like put my head down and I was I just like put my head down and I was like, just do the work. like, just do the work. like, just do the work. >> I worked on my scenes. I went in for the >> I worked on my scenes. I went in for the >> I worked on my scenes. I went in for the audition. audition. audition. I got the job. I continued working on I got the job. I continued working on I got the job. I continued working on because that didn't mean that the show because that didn't mean that the show because that didn't mean that the show gets picked up. if you just did the gets picked up. if you just did the gets picked up. if you just did the pilot. Um, I continued working on like pilot. Um, I continued working on like pilot. Um, I continued working on like other things, you know, looking at other things, you know, looking at other things, you know, looking at movies, working with acting coaches, movies, working with acting coaches, movies, working with acting coaches, just learning scenes, learning how to just learning scenes, learning how to just learning scenes, learning how to speak in the English language, not speak in the English language, not speak in the English language, not speak, but delivering dialogues in the speak, but delivering dialogues in the speak, but delivering dialogues in the English language. I my brain was tuned English language. I my brain was tuned English language. I my brain was tuned to impro improvising in Hindi. to impro improvising in Hindi. to impro improvising in Hindi. >> I can do that cuz I'd done so much work >> I can do that cuz I'd done so much work >> I can do that cuz I'd done so much work in the Hindi language. So, it was a in the Hindi language. So, it was a in the Hindi language. So, it was a pivot of my brain as well. pivot of my brain as well. pivot of my brain as well. to be able to read sides in English to be able to read sides in English to be able to read sides in English >> and deliver those lines. So, I worked >> and deliver those lines. So, I worked >> and deliver those lines. So, I worked with a lot of acting coaches, some with a lot of acting coaches, some with a lot of acting coaches, some amazingly talented people both in New amazingly talented people both in New amazingly talented people both in New York and LA to kind of be able to get York and LA to kind of be able to get York and LA to kind of be able to get more comfortable with that. And um yeah, more comfortable with that. And um yeah, more comfortable with that. And um yeah, I just decided to focus on the work and I just decided to focus on the work and I just decided to focus on the work and slowly picked up and you know it took a slowly picked up and you know it took a slowly picked up and you know it took a lot of like smaller parts figuring out lot of like smaller parts figuring out lot of like smaller parts figuring out you know where I land to now you know you know where I land to now you know you know where I land to now you know producing the movies that I work in. So producing the movies that I work in. So producing the movies that I work in. So it was it was it was >> a long journey >> a long journey >> a long journey emotionally traumatic um in many ways emotionally traumatic um in many ways emotionally traumatic um in many ways personally for me personally for me personally for me >> but I'm happy to be on the other side of >> but I'm happy to be on the other side of >> but I'm happy to be on the other side of it. it. it. >> Yeah absolutely. I mean when you >> Yeah absolutely. I mean when you >> Yeah absolutely. I mean when you described that period of your life as described that period of your life as described that period of your life as drowning drowning drowning >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> and transitioning away from the industry >> and transitioning away from the industry >> and transitioning away from the industry and then finding air even in the newness and then finding air even in the newness and then finding air even in the newness of music and and how that comes in. I of music and and how that comes in. I of music and and how that comes in. I mean that and then adding on all the mean that and then adding on all the mean that and then adding on all the context you just gave us of how hard context you just gave us of how hard context you just gave us of how hard that time was whether it was personally that time was whether it was personally that time was whether it was personally with your father whether it's with your father whether it's with your father whether it's professionally with new work new professionally with new work new professionally with new work new industry industry industry >> just not knowing anyone >> just not knowing anyone >> just not knowing anyone >> just not knowing anyone the loneliness >> just not knowing anyone the loneliness >> just not knowing anyone the loneliness that comes with it. I mean, it sounds that comes with it. I mean, it sounds that comes with it. I mean, it sounds like you you said it in your own words. like you you said it in your own words. like you you said it in your own words. It's a really dark time. It's a really dark time. It's a really dark time. >> It's it it was tough. Yeah, >> It's it it was tough. Yeah, >> It's it it was tough. Yeah, >> it felt really dark, but I think the >> it felt really dark, but I think the >> it felt really dark, but I think the fact that I could pull myself out of it fact that I could pull myself out of it fact that I could pull myself out of it with the help of, you know, some amazing with the help of, you know, some amazing with the help of, you know, some amazing people that came into my life like an, people that came into my life like an, people that came into my life like an, like Jimmy, like, um, Dana, um, my team like Jimmy, like, um, Dana, um, my team like Jimmy, like, um, Dana, um, my team in India, Natasha, like these are people in India, Natasha, like these are people in India, Natasha, like these are people that like really held me together that like really held me together that like really held me together [gasps] [gasps] [gasps] >> at that time when I didn't have friends >> at that time when I didn't have friends >> at that time when I didn't have friends and family around me. And and family around me. And and family around me. And >> you know, we've all worked together now >> you know, we've all worked together now >> you know, we've all worked together now for 15 to 20 years. But you know, I was for 15 to 20 years. But you know, I was for 15 to 20 years. But you know, I was very lucky to have had very lucky to have had very lucky to have had people around me that didn't let me feel people around me that didn't let me feel people around me that didn't let me feel the weight and the gravity of what it the weight and the gravity of what it the weight and the gravity of what it felt like to me. Cuz it may not have felt like to me. Cuz it may not have felt like to me. Cuz it may not have been the reality, been the reality, been the reality, >> but it felt like that to me. And now, >> but it felt like that to me. And now, >> but it felt like that to me. And now, you know, I acknowledge feelings. you know, I acknowledge feelings. you know, I acknowledge feelings. [laughter] [laughter] [laughter] >> So, this is this is me acknowledging >> So, this is this is me acknowledging >> So, this is this is me acknowledging what I felt those 12, 14 years ago when what I felt those 12, 14 years ago when what I felt those 12, 14 years ago when I what are we in 2026? This was 2010, I what are we in 2026? This was 2010, I what are we in 2026? This was 2010, >> 15, 16 years ago, >> 15, 16 years ago, >> 15, 16 years ago, >> but I felt like that. >> but I felt like that. >> but I felt like that. >> Yeah. Well, it's I I think it's >> Yeah. Well, it's I I think it's >> Yeah. Well, it's I I think it's fascinating that we we don't necessarily fascinating that we we don't necessarily fascinating that we we don't necessarily give people the credit they deserve when give people the credit they deserve when give people the credit they deserve when they're here with us and living on the they're here with us and living on the they're here with us and living on the planet. And you know, that that is it's planet. And you know, that that is it's planet. And you know, that that is it's a really a really a really >> I always think about that. >> I always think about that. >> I always think about that. >> It's such an interesting human trait. >> It's such an interesting human trait. >> It's such an interesting human trait. >> I always think about that so much. And >> I always think about that so much. And >> I always think about that so much. And you know, I actually started thinking you know, I actually started thinking you know, I actually started thinking about it after my dad honestly because about it after my dad honestly because about it after my dad honestly because it was such a personal loss um for me it was such a personal loss um for me it was such a personal loss um for me and I there were so many people that and I there were so many people that and I there were so many people that came out for we called it it called it came out for we called it it called it came out for we called it it called it his celebration ceremony but it's his celebration ceremony but it's his celebration ceremony but it's actually the cha which happens on the actually the cha which happens on the actually the cha which happens on the fourth day after you lose someone um in fourth day after you lose someone um in fourth day after you lose someone um in Hinduism Hinduism Hinduism >> and so you give the family like 4 days >> and so you give the family like 4 days >> and so you give the family like 4 days to mourn and fourth day you know to mourn and fourth day you know to mourn and fourth day you know everyone else can start coming in to everyone else can start coming in to everyone else can start coming in to give their wishes and there were so many give their wishes and there were so many give their wishes and there were so many people that celebrated my father and people that celebrated my father and people that celebrated my father and spoke so highly of him and and I was spoke so highly of him and and I was spoke so highly of him and and I was like why didn't you say that to him when like why didn't you say that to him when like why didn't you say that to him when he was here? he was here? he was here? He would have loved to hear that. And He would have loved to hear that. And He would have loved to hear that. And I have started actually making a I have started actually making a I have started actually making a practice in my life of reaching out to practice in my life of reaching out to practice in my life of reaching out to people just if I think of them or if I people just if I think of them or if I people just if I think of them or if I see good work or you know someone's on see good work or you know someone's on see good work or you know someone's on my mind and I haven't been in touch with my mind and I haven't been in touch with my mind and I haven't been in touch with them for many many years. I'll just send them for many many years. I'll just send them for many many years. I'll just send a text saying hey I'm thinking of you. I a text saying hey I'm thinking of you. I a text saying hey I'm thinking of you. I appreciate you. And um it's usually like appreciate you. And um it's usually like appreciate you. And um it's usually like takes people they're like you texted me takes people they're like you texted me takes people they're like you texted me after 10 years. I feel like it heals me after 10 years. I feel like it heals me after 10 years. I feel like it heals me >> every time I think of, you know, seeing >> every time I think of, you know, seeing >> every time I think of, you know, seeing someone's achievement or because I would someone's achievement or because I would someone's achievement or because I would have wanted that. I would want that for have wanted that. I would want that for have wanted that. I would want that for me and I would want that for I think me and I would want that for I think me and I would want that for I think everybody deserves to hear if that you everybody deserves to hear if that you everybody deserves to hear if that you are appreciated or that you mean are appreciated or that you mean are appreciated or that you mean something to someone or you've done something to someone or you've done something to someone or you've done something that moved somebody. something that moved somebody. something that moved somebody. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Um and we should try and do that while >> Um and we should try and do that while >> Um and we should try and do that while people are on this planet. And it just people are on this planet. And it just people are on this planet. And it just takes a text or a thought. The more you takes a text or a thought. The more you takes a text or a thought. The more you start doing it, it's a butterfly effect start doing it, it's a butterfly effect start doing it, it's a butterfly effect of just niceness. of just niceness. of just niceness. >> Yeah. Yeah. And I love that you spoke >> Yeah. Yeah. And I love that you spoke >> Yeah. Yeah. And I love that you spoke about your father because this isn't about your father because this isn't about your father because this isn't about doing it for people just in the about doing it for people just in the about doing it for people just in the public eye. It's just the idea of life. public eye. It's just the idea of life. public eye. It's just the idea of life. Like this is not at all in the public Like this is not at all in the public Like this is not at all in the public eye. eye. eye. >> This is not a public eye thing. >> This is not a public eye thing. >> This is not a public eye thing. >> I'm talking about like nobody needs to >> I'm talking about like nobody needs to >> I'm talking about like nobody needs to know this. It's between you and that know this. It's between you and that know this. It's between you and that person. person. person. >> That's correct. Yeah. Exactly. >> That's correct. Yeah. Exactly. >> That's correct. Yeah. Exactly. >> It's not on Instagram. >> It's not on Instagram. >> It's not on Instagram. >> Yeah. That's why I love what you said >> Yeah. That's why I love what you said >> Yeah. That's why I love what you said about your dad. Like about your dad. Like about your dad. Like >> it's just it's a text. >> it's just it's a text. >> it's just it's a text. >> Yeah. Just people need to know while >> Yeah. Just people need to know while >> Yeah. Just people need to know while they're here, while they're living, they're here, while they're living, they're here, while they're living, while they're breathing, how you feel while they're breathing, how you feel while they're breathing, how you feel about them. And for people to be about them. And for people to be about them. And for people to be celebrated and honored while they're celebrated and honored while they're celebrated and honored while they're here with us because yeah, you see it here with us because yeah, you see it here with us because yeah, you see it all the time. Someone passes away and all the time. Someone passes away and all the time. Someone passes away and all of a sudden there's a eruption of all of a sudden there's a eruption of all of a sudden there's a eruption of love and joy, but it's like they weren't love and joy, but it's like they weren't love and joy, but it's like they weren't experiencing that while they were alive. experiencing that while they were alive. experiencing that while they were alive. And what a loss. What a loss. not only And what a loss. What a loss. not only And what a loss. What a loss. not only for them but for us to even have the for them but for us to even have the for them but for us to even have the opportunity to express that gratitude or opportunity to express that gratitude or opportunity to express that gratitude or notice that about them or notice that about them or notice that about them or >> it's such a privilege to be able to >> it's such a privilege to be able to >> it's such a privilege to be able to express to someone what you feel for express to someone what you feel for express to someone what you feel for them. them. them. >> Mhm. >> Mhm. >> Mhm. >> As a world, as a society, we don't >> As a world, as a society, we don't >> As a world, as a society, we don't encourage our young or our ourselves encourage our young or our ourselves encourage our young or our ourselves enough to be able to be honest when you enough to be able to be honest when you enough to be able to be honest when you feel something for someone just feel something for someone just feel something for someone just appreciating people. I didn't know that appreciating people. I didn't know that appreciating people. I didn't know that at all when I was younger. Again, I at all when I was younger. Again, I at all when I was younger. Again, I guess as you evolve in life, guess as you evolve in life, guess as you evolve in life, >> but in my 20ies, I was like, my attitude >> but in my 20ies, I was like, my attitude >> but in my 20ies, I was like, my attitude literally was everyone is doing their literally was everyone is doing their literally was everyone is doing their job. job. job. >> So, you know, I'm doing my job. I'm not >> So, you know, I'm doing my job. I'm not >> So, you know, I'm doing my job. I'm not appreci I'm not expecting appreciation, appreci I'm not expecting appreciation, appreci I'm not expecting appreciation, so why should anybody else expect so why should anybody else expect so why should anybody else expect appreciation? appreciation? appreciation? >> It was so tough. >> It was so tough. >> It was so tough. >> Yeah. [laughter] >> Yeah. [laughter] >> Yeah. [laughter] >> That's that hard hard on yourself. I I >> That's that hard hard on yourself. I I >> That's that hard hard on yourself. I I guess I I was um allowing myself to not guess I I was um allowing myself to not guess I I was um allowing myself to not have the expectation of appreciation have the expectation of appreciation have the expectation of appreciation because I never got it. because I never got it. because I never got it. >> Yes. >> Yes. >> Yes. >> So I think it came my attitude came from >> So I think it came my attitude came from >> So I think it came my attitude came from protecting myself. Now I understand this protecting myself. Now I understand this protecting myself. Now I understand this at that time like even a few years back at that time like even a few years back at that time like even a few years back I was like that I would just I was like I was like that I would just I was like I was like that I would just I was like I don't expect you to say I did an I don't expect you to say I did an I don't expect you to say I did an amazing job or if my scene is right I'm amazing job or if my scene is right I'm amazing job or if my scene is right I'm not expecting the director to be like not expecting the director to be like not expecting the director to be like clap for me so why do I have to do that clap for me so why do I have to do that clap for me so why do I have to do that for people? It was like such a tough for people? It was like such a tough for people? It was like such a tough like attitude. Um but I understood why like attitude. Um but I understood why like attitude. Um but I understood why because you know I would not get because you know I would not get because you know I would not get appreciation. I was navigating this appreciation. I was navigating this appreciation. I was navigating this really [laughter] really [laughter] really [laughter] um insane new industry and I didn't want um insane new industry and I didn't want um insane new industry and I didn't want to have to seek it. to have to seek it. to have to seek it. >> So I built this wall where I was like >> So I built this wall where I was like >> So I built this wall where I was like nobody needs it but you do. Everyone nobody needs it but you do. Everyone nobody needs it but you do. Everyone does. And you know, now I've understood does. And you know, now I've understood does. And you know, now I've understood that it's just I don't know where what that it's just I don't know where what that it's just I don't know where what that learning was, but I think just that learning was, but I think just that learning was, but I think just appreciating people is just nice. appreciating people is just nice. appreciating people is just nice. [laughter] [laughter] [laughter] >> But I love the self-reflection of it >> But I love the self-reflection of it >> But I love the self-reflection of it that that that >> again it's we I think we all go through >> again it's we I think we all go through >> again it's we I think we all go through that phase where you're really blocking that phase where you're really blocking that phase where you're really blocking something because you're right, we don't something because you're right, we don't something because you're right, we don't want to want validation. No one wants to want to want validation. No one wants to want to want validation. No one wants to want it, want it, want it, >> but we kind of like it. And then and >> but we kind of like it. And then and >> but we kind of like it. And then and then you're fighting against that then you're fighting against that then you're fighting against that feeling of why do I want it? I shouldn't feeling of why do I want it? I shouldn't feeling of why do I want it? I shouldn't want it and therefore no one else should want it and therefore no one else should want it and therefore no one else should want it. But really deep down we all want it. But really deep down we all want it. But really deep down we all need it. Because I was saying to someone need it. Because I was saying to someone need it. Because I was saying to someone today like I was we were talking about today like I was we were talking about today like I was we were talking about the need for usefulness. Like everyone the need for usefulness. Like everyone the need for usefulness. Like everyone wants to feel useful. wants to feel useful. wants to feel useful. >> We think people want to feel important >> We think people want to feel important >> We think people want to feel important or significant or celebrated. And it's or significant or celebrated. And it's or significant or celebrated. And it's like most of us like good humans who not like most of us like good humans who not like most of us like good humans who not narcissists or living in a we just want narcissists or living in a we just want narcissists or living in a we just want to feel useful. And it's when you don't to feel useful. And it's when you don't to feel useful. And it's when you don't feel useful to someone that you feel feel useful to someone that you feel feel useful to someone that you feel valueless and helpless and Did I add valueless and helpless and Did I add valueless and helpless and Did I add something? something? something? >> Exactly. All we want >> Exactly. All we want >> Exactly. All we want >> to bring something to the table. >> to bring something to the table. >> to bring something to the table. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> And without having to ask for it, >> And without having to ask for it, >> And without having to ask for it, >> you know, you don't want to have to ask >> you know, you don't want to have to ask >> you know, you don't want to have to ask like do I bring value, like do I bring value, like do I bring value, >> you know? Um >> you know? Um >> you know? Um >> and especially when you're starting out >> and especially when you're starting out >> and especially when you're starting out in any job, you're like you if you're in any job, you're like you if you're in any job, you're like you if you're told even once that you bring value, it told even once that you bring value, it told even once that you bring value, it just it makes you want to do better just it makes you want to do better just it makes you want to do better work, you know? And I think that why I work, you know? And I think that why I work, you know? And I think that why I did that to myself was because I didn't did that to myself was because I didn't did that to myself was because I didn't know if I would get it and I didn't want know if I would get it and I didn't want know if I would get it and I didn't want to put myself in a position where I had to put myself in a position where I had to put myself in a position where I had the expectations and then I was let the expectations and then I was let the expectations and then I was let down. down. down. >> Of course. >> Of course. >> Of course. >> So I just normalized the fact that >> So I just normalized the fact that >> So I just normalized the fact that nobody needs appreciation. I don't need nobody needs appreciation. I don't need nobody needs appreciation. I don't need it. You don't need it. it. You don't need it. it. You don't need it. >> Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. We >> Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. We >> Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. We repeat what we reward. repeat what we reward. repeat what we reward. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> So if we reward the feeling of, oh, I >> So if we reward the feeling of, oh, I >> So if we reward the feeling of, oh, I don't want it. I don't need it. We're don't want it. I don't need it. We're don't want it. I don't need it. We're going to repeat then. If we if we reward going to repeat then. If we if we reward going to repeat then. If we if we reward someone for putting in effort, doing someone for putting in effort, doing someone for putting in effort, doing good work, that person will repeat it good work, that person will repeat it good work, that person will repeat it because that's what inspires all of us. because that's what inspires all of us. because that's what inspires all of us. >> I I really appreciate you going there on >> I I really appreciate you going there on >> I I really appreciate you going there on on that theme of just how hard that on that theme of just how hard that on that theme of just how hard that transition was because I think from the transition was because I think from the transition was because I think from the outside, you make it look easy, outside, you make it look easy, outside, you make it look easy, >> but it's not like I said, no one's >> but it's not like I said, no one's >> but it's not like I said, no one's business. business. business. >> Like it's hard for me to talk about >> Like it's hard for me to talk about >> Like it's hard for me to talk about personal struggles because there's just personal struggles because there's just personal struggles because there's just so much hardship in the world. Like I so much hardship in the world. Like I so much hardship in the world. Like I feel really like even what was hard for feel really like even what was hard for feel really like even what was hard for me, it's not as hard as what everybody me, it's not as hard as what everybody me, it's not as hard as what everybody like there's so many people going like there's so many people going like there's so many people going through so much worse. So there is a through so much worse. So there is a through so much worse. So there is a part of myself that still is hard on part of myself that still is hard on part of myself that still is hard on myself [laughter] for um you know myself [laughter] for um you know myself [laughter] for um you know >> cuz it's not hard enough. Your life is >> cuz it's not hard enough. Your life is >> cuz it's not hard enough. Your life is not hard enough. not hard enough. not hard enough. >> You're like don't you shouldn't be >> You're like don't you shouldn't be >> You're like don't you shouldn't be feeling that way. Don't be silly. like feeling that way. Don't be silly. like feeling that way. Don't be silly. like uh uh uh >> but you know like everyone has struggles >> but you know like everyone has struggles >> but you know like everyone has struggles in their lives and it it's tough to talk in their lives and it it's tough to talk in their lives and it it's tough to talk about it because you're like about it because you're like about it because you're like >> like what was so hard about that >> like what was so hard about that >> like what was so hard about that >> just personally >> just personally >> just personally >> it was Yeah. Yeah. Not in context or >> it was Yeah. Yeah. Not in context or >> it was Yeah. Yeah. Not in context or comparison to anyone else. It's comparison to anyone else. It's comparison to anyone else. It's >> it's acknowledging how you feel. I mean >> it's acknowledging how you feel. I mean >> it's acknowledging how you feel. I mean that seemed like a big transition for that seemed like a big transition for that seemed like a big transition for you and when Nick was on the show he you and when Nick was on the show he you and when Nick was on the show he spoke so vulnerably and openly about the spoke so vulnerably and openly about the spoke so vulnerably and openly about the birth of your daughter which was birth of your daughter which was birth of your daughter which was traumatic to say the least and of course traumatic to say the least and of course traumatic to say the least and of course amazing but in the in that moment just amazing but in the in that moment just amazing but in the in that moment just how heavy it was and difficult it was how heavy it was and difficult it was how heavy it was and difficult it was just for both of you and going through just for both of you and going through just for both of you and going through that process I wanted to ask you if you that process I wanted to ask you if you that process I wanted to ask you if you were comfortable sharing from your heart were comfortable sharing from your heart were comfortable sharing from your heart and your words what that experience was and your words what that experience was and your words what that experience was like for you. The whole thing was tough like for you. The whole thing was tough like for you. The whole thing was tough because our journey because our journey because our journey to Malti itself was really rough. I to Malti itself was really rough. I to Malti itself was really rough. I don't want to get into details because don't want to get into details because don't want to get into details because I'm not I don't know if I'm I'm not I don't know if I'm I'm not I don't know if I'm >> ready to talk about it. >> ready to talk about it. >> ready to talk about it. >> Mhm. >> Mhm. >> Mhm. >> But it was uh very hard on me and she's >> But it was uh very hard on me and she's >> But it was uh very hard on me and she's a miracle baby because she was my like a miracle baby because she was my like a miracle baby because she was my like only hope at that time to be able to only hope at that time to be able to only hope at that time to be able to have a baby. have a baby. have a baby. So when we were told that she's coming So when we were told that she's coming So when we were told that she's coming like at 27 weeks, I just shut down. I like at 27 weeks, I just shut down. I like at 27 weeks, I just shut down. I remember I sat in front of a fire remember I sat in front of a fire remember I sat in front of a fire fireplace in our house for I think like fireplace in our house for I think like fireplace in our house for I think like 9 hours or something. And for someone 9 hours or something. And for someone 9 hours or something. And for someone who's always so solutionoriented, who's always so solutionoriented, who's always so solutionoriented, I didn't have a thought in my brain. And I didn't have a thought in my brain. And I didn't have a thought in my brain. And Nick was somewhere and he came back and Nick was somewhere and he came back and Nick was somewhere and he came back and we just he grabbed me, we loaded the car we just he grabbed me, we loaded the car we just he grabbed me, we loaded the car and our dogs and we drove. It was co and our dogs and we drove. It was co and our dogs and we drove. It was co time and just the situation under which time and just the situation under which time and just the situation under which she was born was so much duress for she was born was so much duress for she was born was so much duress for everyone involved everyone involved everyone involved and it was just really intense. and it was just really intense. and it was just really intense. She was purple. She was purple. She was purple. Um, Um, Um, and like we didn't know. and like we didn't know. and like we didn't know. Uh, the NICU nurses the NICU nurses couldn't couldn't couldn't like like like their little finger was too big for her their little finger was too big for her their little finger was too big for her mouth. how they intubated her. Um was Um was like I still see that image like I still see that image like I still see that image um um um and thankfully everything was fine with and thankfully everything was fine with and thankfully everything was fine with our surrogate. Um our surrogate. Um our surrogate. Um so we could focus our energy and just I so we could focus our energy and just I so we could focus our energy and just I was just numb. I I just remember was just numb. I I just remember was just numb. I I just remember >> like I didn't know what to do or how to >> like I didn't know what to do or how to >> like I didn't know what to do or how to be useful in that moment. be useful in that moment. be useful in that moment. We went with her to the NICU. One of us We went with her to the NICU. One of us We went with her to the NICU. One of us was allowed at a time and she cried the was allowed at a time and she cried the was allowed at a time and she cried the first time and it was like a cat. Like first time and it was like a cat. Like first time and it was like a cat. Like just a just like that. All we got. My just a just like that. All we got. My just a just like that. All we got. My mom flew down, my in-laws flew down, but mom flew down, my in-laws flew down, but mom flew down, my in-laws flew down, but we were in the hospital and it was such we were in the hospital and it was such we were in the hospital and it was such a personally traumatic time, a personally traumatic time, a personally traumatic time, but somehow because we were in and out but somehow because we were in and out but somehow because we were in and out of the hospital, I remember it leaked of the hospital, I remember it leaked of the hospital, I remember it leaked and we got a text saying that it's going and we got a text saying that it's going and we got a text saying that it's going to her birth is going to be put out by to her birth is going to be put out by to her birth is going to be put out by the papers. Um, and I don't want to give the papers. Um, and I don't want to give the papers. Um, and I don't want to give credence to who sent us that um, message credence to who sent us that um, message credence to who sent us that um, message or which network it was, but um, that if or which network it was, but um, that if or which network it was, but um, that if we don't like they're going to put it we don't like they're going to put it we don't like they're going to put it out in 3 hours. So, we were kind of out in 3 hours. So, we were kind of out in 3 hours. So, we were kind of forced into announcing her birth, which forced into announcing her birth, which forced into announcing her birth, which cuz we wanted to hold on to our own cuz we wanted to hold on to our own cuz we wanted to hold on to our own narrative of of it, but we weren't ready narrative of of it, but we weren't ready narrative of of it, but we weren't ready cuz we didn't know what would happen cuz we didn't know what would happen cuz we didn't know what would happen with her or how she would be. [gasps] with her or how she would be. [gasps] with her or how she would be. [gasps] Um it was 3 months almost 110 days. We Um it was 3 months almost 110 days. We Um it was 3 months almost 110 days. We stopped everything. We were in the stopped everything. We were in the stopped everything. We were in the hospital every day with her. We did hospital every day with her. We did hospital every day with her. We did shifts so that she could be on our skin. shifts so that she could be on our skin. shifts so that she could be on our skin. Um the nurses said from day two of life Um the nurses said from day two of life Um the nurses said from day two of life that we should be doing skin-to-skin. So that we should be doing skin-to-skin. So that we should be doing skin-to-skin. So Nick would sing to her on his guitar. Nick would sing to her on his guitar. Nick would sing to her on his guitar. I used to have this little iPod which I used to have this little iPod which I used to have this little iPod which played all my mantras. My mahamit played all my mantras. My mahamit played all my mantras. My mahamit mantra, my guy mantra, my own like all mantra, my guy mantra, my own like all mantra, my guy mantra, my own like all of it would play all day of it would play all day of it would play all day >> in like inside her crib just softly. >> in like inside her crib just softly. >> in like inside her crib just softly. >> There were a lot of people praying for >> There were a lot of people praying for >> There were a lot of people praying for her. her. her. >> She was very very desired, very coveted >> She was very very desired, very coveted >> She was very very desired, very coveted and treasured because she was so hard. and treasured because she was so hard. and treasured because she was so hard. It was so hard her journey um to get to It was so hard her journey um to get to It was so hard her journey um to get to this planet this planet this planet and she had like six blood transfusions. and she had like six blood transfusions. and she had like six blood transfusions. You know, I used to feel like she looked You know, I used to feel like she looked You know, I used to feel like she looked just like Nick and I as a combination, just like Nick and I as a combination, just like Nick and I as a combination, but everyone says that she looked like but everyone says that she looked like but everyone says that she looked like him. But even in those days like as soon him. But even in those days like as soon him. But even in those days like as soon as we would be switching out like she as we would be switching out like she as we would be switching out like she would recognize our voices and smile would recognize our voices and smile would recognize our voices and smile like just her eyes weren't open but she like just her eyes weren't open but she like just her eyes weren't open but she would have a little like slight smile would have a little like slight smile would have a little like slight smile and if you ever meet our daughter she and if you ever meet our daughter she and if you ever meet our daughter she has the most glorious smile on the has the most glorious smile on the has the most glorious smile on the planet like planet like planet like >> full face laugh. >> full face laugh. >> full face laugh. So it was [sighs and gasps] So it was [sighs and gasps] So it was [sighs and gasps] a brutal time but I think I talk to a brutal time but I think I talk to a brutal time but I think I talk to myself when I'm in tough situations. myself when I'm in tough situations. myself when I'm in tough situations. Once I got out of the stunned Once I got out of the stunned Once I got out of the stunned nature of it, I realized how afraid she nature of it, I realized how afraid she nature of it, I realized how afraid she must have been. So, I didn't have the must have been. So, I didn't have the must have been. So, I didn't have the privilege of being upset or afraid. I privilege of being upset or afraid. I privilege of being upset or afraid. I had to show up as her mom and I had to had to show up as her mom and I had to had to show up as her mom and I had to be tough through it. I had to smile for be tough through it. I had to smile for be tough through it. I had to smile for her. I had to equip myself her. I had to equip myself her. I had to equip myself to take care of a preeie baby and make to take care of a preeie baby and make to take care of a preeie baby and make sure she's the healthiest that she can sure she's the healthiest that she can sure she's the healthiest that she can be. And that's just what my focus turned be. And that's just what my focus turned be. And that's just what my focus turned into. And I was like, it is not about me into. And I was like, it is not about me into. And I was like, it is not about me or him. And this happened like or him. And this happened like or him. And this happened like immediately as soon as I she was on my immediately as soon as I she was on my immediately as soon as I she was on my chest for the first time at almost 27 chest for the first time at almost 27 chest for the first time at almost 27 and 1/2 weeks or like 2 or 3 days after. and 1/2 weeks or like 2 or 3 days after. and 1/2 weeks or like 2 or 3 days after. And she was so tiny that her fingers And she was so tiny that her fingers And she was so tiny that her fingers felt like butterflies on me. She was felt like butterflies on me. She was felt like butterflies on me. She was just like this little just like this little just like this little 1 lb 11 oz. In that moment, I was like, 1 lb 11 oz. In that moment, I was like, 1 lb 11 oz. In that moment, I was like, I will go to the ends of the earth to I will go to the ends of the earth to I will go to the ends of the earth to protect you. It's a feeling I have never protect you. It's a feeling I have never protect you. It's a feeling I have never felt before. And I think every first felt before. And I think every first felt before. And I think every first time parent says that, but it's like time parent says that, but it's like time parent says that, but it's like your heart is beating outside of your your heart is beating outside of your your heart is beating outside of your body. And especially with her cuz she body. And especially with her cuz she body. And especially with her cuz she was so vulnerable. was so vulnerable. was so vulnerable. I became a tigerist about everything I became a tigerist about everything I became a tigerist about everything from her nutrition to, you know, her from her nutrition to, you know, her from her nutrition to, you know, her medication to her transfusions to Nick medication to her transfusions to Nick medication to her transfusions to Nick and I as a team. We didn't have to talk and I as a team. We didn't have to talk and I as a team. We didn't have to talk to each other. It was just done. We used to each other. It was just done. We used to each other. It was just done. We used to look at one another and, you know, to look at one another and, you know, to look at one another and, you know, we'd have the diaper bag. We'd have like we'd have the diaper bag. We'd have like we'd have the diaper bag. We'd have like tomorrow we have to tomorrow's her bath tomorrow we have to tomorrow's her bath tomorrow we have to tomorrow's her bath day. We'd have the bath. Like all the day. We'd have the bath. Like all the day. We'd have the bath. Like all the little things make sure that you know little things make sure that you know little things make sure that you know she has this much of milk and is she she has this much of milk and is she she has this much of milk and is she just every little thing about her to just every little thing about her to just every little thing about her to make sure she gets to that weight and make sure she gets to that weight and make sure she gets to that weight and just survives was the only order of just survives was the only order of just survives was the only order of business. Everything else took a business. Everything else took a business. Everything else took a backseat and the day we brought her home backseat and the day we brought her home backseat and the day we brought her home she was still so tiny and I have a big she was still so tiny and I have a big she was still so tiny and I have a big mandr in our house mandr in our house mandr in our house >> with a big shiv gi's morti who I really >> with a big shiv gi's morti who I really >> with a big shiv gi's morti who I really I'm a big shival bhakta I really believe I'm a big shival bhakta I really believe I'm a big shival bhakta I really believe that you know bleaba has guided me that you know bleaba has guided me that you know bleaba has guided me through through through >> every difficult moment in my life and >> every difficult moment in my life and >> every difficult moment in my life and I've like sat on his shoulders and we I've like sat on his shoulders and we I've like sat on his shoulders and we just as a family sat in front of his just as a family sat in front of his just as a family sat in front of his vision. vision. vision. And And And I think that's the first time I really I think that's the first time I really I think that's the first time I really wept. She was still so tiny. But I just wept. She was still so tiny. But I just wept. She was still so tiny. But I just I wept for the grace that she survived, I wept for the grace that she survived, I wept for the grace that she survived, the gratitude that she was home, that the gratitude that she was home, that the gratitude that she was home, that she chose us, that we could make this she chose us, that we could make this she chose us, that we could make this happen where, you know, she could be in happen where, you know, she could be in happen where, you know, she could be in this world and have this thriving life. this world and have this thriving life. this world and have this thriving life. Um, IVF is tough and everything that Um, IVF is tough and everything that Um, IVF is tough and everything that contributed to her being on this earth I contributed to her being on this earth I contributed to her being on this earth I was just so grateful for and just was just so grateful for and just was just so grateful for and just relieved. And after that, we had um, you relieved. And after that, we had um, you relieved. And after that, we had um, you know, a big haven for her when she came know, a big haven for her when she came know, a big haven for her when she came home and [clears throat and snorts] um, home and [clears throat and snorts] um, home and [clears throat and snorts] um, her naming ceremony and and then it just her naming ceremony and and then it just her naming ceremony and and then it just it became real, it became real, it became real, >> you know. Yeah. Gosh. I think anyone who hears Yeah. Gosh. I think anyone who hears that just, you know, so sorry you had to that just, you know, so sorry you had to that just, you know, so sorry you had to go through that and sorry that the go through that and sorry that the go through that and sorry that the family had to go through it together as family had to go through it together as family had to go through it together as well. And well. And well. And >> I just I was thinking about it, you >> I just I was thinking about it, you >> I just I was thinking about it, you know, cuz I saw on your podcast when know, cuz I saw on your podcast when know, cuz I saw on your podcast when Nick talked about it and um I knew we Nick talked about it and um I knew we Nick talked about it and um I knew we would talk about it also, would talk about it also, would talk about it also, >> but um I was kind of thinking about like >> but um I was kind of thinking about like >> but um I was kind of thinking about like why. I've started thinking a lot about why. I've started thinking a lot about why. I've started thinking a lot about the wise in my life, like how did I the wise in my life, like how did I the wise in my life, like how did I >> navigate them? Because when you're doing >> navigate them? Because when you're doing >> navigate them? Because when you're doing it, you just do, right? You just take it, you just do, right? You just take it, you just do, right? You just take your choices. You're not your choices. You're not your choices. You're not >> really thinking about the why. But in >> really thinking about the why. But in >> really thinking about the why. But in retrospect, I like retrospect, I like retrospect, I like >> to kind of unpick at that a little bit. >> to kind of unpick at that a little bit. >> to kind of unpick at that a little bit. >> And I was unpicking at it. And >> And I was unpicking at it. And >> And I was unpicking at it. And >> I guess my choice to have kids at a >> I guess my choice to have kids at a >> I guess my choice to have kids at a later stage contributed to this being a later stage contributed to this being a later stage contributed to this being a really tough journey for me. M really tough journey for me. M really tough journey for me. M >> but if I would have done it earlier >> but if I would have done it earlier >> but if I would have done it earlier would it have been the wrong time would it have been the wrong time would it have been the wrong time >> it wouldn't have been her. So >> it wouldn't have been her. So >> it wouldn't have been her. So I have to I kind of made my peace with I have to I kind of made my peace with I have to I kind of made my peace with the fact that this journey came from the fact that this journey came from the fact that this journey came from making the right choice for me and for making the right choice for me and for making the right choice for me and for my biggest flex honestly I feel is I'm my biggest flex honestly I feel is I'm my biggest flex honestly I feel is I'm living this life with the right guy with living this life with the right guy with living this life with the right guy with the right father for the right father for the right father for this incredible baby that we have And this incredible baby that we have And this incredible baby that we have And that was meant to be. that was meant to be. that was meant to be. >> And the journey was meant to be. >> And the journey was meant to be. >> And the journey was meant to be. >> I feel really blessed to be on the other >> I feel really blessed to be on the other >> I feel really blessed to be on the other side of it, like I said. But side of it, like I said. But side of it, like I said. But >> it couldn't have been any other way. >> it couldn't have been any other way. >> it couldn't have been any other way. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> So, you have to kind of forgive >> So, you have to kind of forgive >> So, you have to kind of forgive yourself. yourself. yourself. >> Yeah. I feel like that overthinking >> Yeah. I feel like that overthinking >> Yeah. I feel like that overthinking brain brain brain >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> of well, if I did it this time, if I >> of well, if I did it this time, if I >> of well, if I did it this time, if I could have done it like this and we did could have done it like this and we did could have done it like this and we did that, she wouldn't have had to deal with that, she wouldn't have had to deal with that, she wouldn't have had to deal with it. Yeah. And then you it. Yeah. And then you it. Yeah. And then you >> what she went through, but >> what she went through, but >> what she went through, but >> and you're like, oh, it would be a >> and you're like, oh, it would be a >> and you're like, oh, it would be a different soul. It would completely be a different soul. It would completely be a different soul. It would completely be a different different different >> person, different circumstances, >> person, different circumstances, >> person, different circumstances, different circumstances, different circumstances, different circumstances, >> different like I don't know what that >> different like I don't know what that >> different like I don't know what that would have been like. I can't speak to would have been like. I can't speak to would have been like. I can't speak to that whether it would be good, whether that whether it would be good, whether that whether it would be good, whether it would be bad. It just wouldn't be it would be bad. It just wouldn't be it would be bad. It just wouldn't be this. this. this. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> And this is great. So, you know, I can't >> And this is great. So, you know, I can't >> And this is great. So, you know, I can't speak for the parallel lanes of course. speak for the parallel lanes of course. speak for the parallel lanes of course. >> Yeah. But that's universe. That's what >> Yeah. But that's universe. That's what >> Yeah. But that's universe. That's what the mind does of our life. the mind does of our life. the mind does of our life. >> Yeah. That's what the mind bring back >> Yeah. That's what the mind bring back >> Yeah. That's what the mind bring back >> to the present and the gratitude of, >> to the present and the gratitude of, >> to the present and the gratitude of, >> you know, our little family and being >> you know, our little family and being >> you know, our little family and being able to be together. able to be together. able to be together. >> Yeah. Yeah. The mind plays all those >> Yeah. Yeah. The mind plays all those >> Yeah. Yeah. The mind plays all those games of games of games of >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> the sliding doors and if this then that >> the sliding doors and if this then that >> the sliding doors and if this then that and should have, could have, would have and should have, could have, would have and should have, could have, would have and and it's it's fascinating. I love and and it's it's fascinating. I love and and it's it's fascinating. I love how much faith in your life is such a how much faith in your life is such a how much faith in your life is such a >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> central pillar of a stronghold of how >> central pillar of a stronghold of how >> central pillar of a stronghold of how you, you know, come back to that. And I you, you know, come back to that. And I you, you know, come back to that. And I know that's been there since day one, know that's been there since day one, know that's been there since day one, right, with your family. And right, with your family. And right, with your family. And >> first of all, I think when you grow up >> first of all, I think when you grow up >> first of all, I think when you grow up in India, it's kind of ingrained in in India, it's kind of ingrained in in India, it's kind of ingrained in whatever religion you might grow up in. whatever religion you might grow up in. whatever religion you might grow up in. Faith is a big part of Indian Faith is a big part of Indian Faith is a big part of Indian spirituality spirituality spirituality >> and you know, we are a country of >> and you know, we are a country of >> and you know, we are a country of multiple religions. multiple religions. multiple religions. >> Um, >> Um, >> Um, so I was very influenced by so I was very influenced by so I was very influenced by just faith in general, the multicultural just faith in general, the multicultural just faith in general, the multicultural nature of my family as well. My nature of my family as well. My nature of my family as well. My grandmother's Catholic, you know. Um, my grandmother's Catholic, you know. Um, my grandmother's Catholic, you know. Um, my masi is Muslim. Uh, my we were grown up masi is Muslim. Uh, my we were grown up masi is Muslim. Uh, my we were grown up raised as Hindus, but I went to like a raised as Hindus, but I went to like a raised as Hindus, but I went to like a Catholic school. Like, it was just a lot Catholic school. Like, it was just a lot Catholic school. Like, it was just a lot of influences. And to me, faith is of influences. And to me, faith is of influences. And to me, faith is basically a relationship with something basically a relationship with something basically a relationship with something larger than yourself. larger than yourself. larger than yourself. >> Mhm. >> Mhm. >> Mhm. >> And religion is your path to get there. >> And religion is your path to get there. >> And religion is your path to get there. >> Mhm. >> Mhm. >> Mhm. >> And it's unique to everyone and every >> And it's unique to everyone and every >> And it's unique to everyone and every journey. But I've had a really really journey. But I've had a really really journey. But I've had a really really strong faith in my life since I was a strong faith in my life since I was a strong faith in my life since I was a kid. both my parents did especially um kid. both my parents did especially um kid. both my parents did especially um with Lord with Lord with Lord >> Shiva >> Shiva >> Shiva >> and you know we've been shak from when >> and you know we've been shak from when >> and you know we've been shak from when we were kids and that's a big pillar of we were kids and that's a big pillar of we were kids and that's a big pillar of my faith and um it's really gotten me my faith and um it's really gotten me my faith and um it's really gotten me through through through really scary times and tough times like really scary times and tough times like really scary times and tough times like >> I kind of just like close my eyes and go >> I kind of just like close my eyes and go >> I kind of just like close my eyes and go into a little box where I'm just talking into a little box where I'm just talking into a little box where I'm just talking to my God like I'm was talking to Buliba to my God like I'm was talking to Buliba to my God like I'm was talking to Buliba and I'm like I say my prayer and I say and I'm like I say my prayer and I say and I'm like I say my prayer and I say you'll get me through it and it's like I you'll get me through it and it's like I you'll get me through it and it's like I feel safe feel safe feel safe >> in the box. It's almost like I'm held >> in the box. It's almost like I'm held >> in the box. It's almost like I'm held and somehow I come through it and somehow I come through it and somehow I come through it >> and that's what it is right like faith >> and that's what it is right like faith >> and that's what it is right like faith should feel like a hug like a safe place should feel like a hug like a safe place should feel like a hug like a safe place and my faith has always felt like that and my faith has always felt like that and my faith has always felt like that to me. to me. to me. >> Thank you for sharing that. It's uh it's >> Thank you for sharing that. It's uh it's >> Thank you for sharing that. It's uh it's as as hard as it is to hear and also to as as hard as it is to hear and also to as as hard as it is to hear and also to hear how hard it was for all of you. hear how hard it was for all of you. hear how hard it was for all of you. It's inspiring and hope giving I think It's inspiring and hope giving I think It's inspiring and hope giving I think to so many to to just hear about how you to so many to to just hear about how you to so many to to just hear about how you all came together. How that hope and all came together. How that hope and all came together. How that hope and that fight and that persistence and the that fight and that persistence and the that fight and that persistence and the shifts that you both did for you know shifts that you both did for you know shifts that you both did for you know the months that you both switched for the months that you both switched for the months that you both switched for and probably not even seeing each other and probably not even seeing each other and probably not even seeing each other much and the change over because you're much and the change over because you're much and the change over because you're trying to give time and and the way you trying to give time and and the way you trying to give time and and the way you both describe her as the miracle baby. both describe her as the miracle baby. both describe her as the miracle baby. It's such a you know Yeah. It's such a you know Yeah. It's such a you know Yeah. >> such a beautiful >> such a beautiful >> such a beautiful >> her soul was meant to be here. >> her soul was meant to be here. >> her soul was meant to be here. >> Yeah. and she clawed her way into life. >> Yeah. and she clawed her way into life. >> Yeah. and she clawed her way into life. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> And I will celebrate that every day >> And I will celebrate that every day >> And I will celebrate that every day >> and so will Nick. Like we celebrate her >> and so will Nick. Like we celebrate her >> and so will Nick. Like we celebrate her every day. She literally said that every day. She literally said that every day. She literally said that yesterday to me. She's like, "Mama, my yesterday to me. She's like, "Mama, my yesterday to me. She's like, "Mama, my birthday just doesn't end." And I was birthday just doesn't end." And I was birthday just doesn't end." And I was like, "It doesn't." like, "It doesn't." like, "It doesn't." >> That's amazing. >> That's amazing. >> That's amazing. >> We celebrate you every day cuz somebody >> We celebrate you every day cuz somebody >> We celebrate you every day cuz somebody came in and got her a present. Her came in and got her a present. Her came in and got her a present. Her birthday is in January. birthday is in January. birthday is in January. >> So she was like, "This just doesn't >> So she was like, "This just doesn't >> So she was like, "This just doesn't end." [laughter] And I was like, "And it end." [laughter] And I was like, "And it end." [laughter] And I was like, "And it won't." won't." won't." >> That's so cute. >> That's so cute. >> That's so cute. >> Every day. I love I love that. Well, >> Every day. I love I love that. Well, >> Every day. I love I love that. Well, Prianka, we've reached out to um I Prianka, we've reached out to um I Prianka, we've reached out to um I reached out to Nick reached out to Nick reached out to Nick >> um to share a letter for you >> um to share a letter for you >> um to share a letter for you >> that I could share with you. >> that I could share with you. >> that I could share with you. >> So, I'm going to read it to you. >> So, I'm going to read it to you. >> So, I'm going to read it to you. >> Did he do this on the day you did the >> Did he do this on the day you did the >> Did he do this on the day you did the podcast? podcast? podcast? >> No, no, no, no. In between. >> No, no, no, no. In between. >> No, no, no, no. In between. >> Oh, >> Oh, >> Oh, >> in between. Not on the day. So, I'm >> in between. Not on the day. So, I'm >> in between. Not on the day. So, I'm going to read it to you from Nick. So, going to read it to you from Nick. So, going to read it to you from Nick. So, this is from Nick to Brianka. this is from Nick to Brianka. this is from Nick to Brianka. So, he said he says, "My chan," which I So, he said he says, "My chan," which I So, he said he says, "My chan," which I love. I'm like just seeing him write love. I'm like just seeing him write love. I'm like just seeing him write that is beautiful. Wow. This is the that is beautiful. Wow. This is the that is beautiful. Wow. This is the first time I'm reading it too. So I've first time I'm reading it too. So I've first time I'm reading it too. So I've not read it. I always save it because not read it. I always save it because not read it. I always save it because I'm not I don't like reading it before I'm not I don't like reading it before I'm not I don't like reading it before it comes. So I've never read it. it comes. So I've never read it. it comes. So I've never read it. >> Oh gosh, I'm embarrassed. >> Oh gosh, I'm embarrassed. >> Oh gosh, I'm embarrassed. >> He goes my I'm constantly in awe of the >> He goes my I'm constantly in awe of the >> He goes my I'm constantly in awe of the person you are. It's not just the big person you are. It's not just the big person you are. It's not just the big titles, global icon, leader, force of titles, global icon, leader, force of titles, global icon, leader, force of nature. It's how you show up as a nature. It's how you show up as a nature. It's how you show up as a mother, a daughter, a sister, and my mother, a daughter, a sister, and my mother, a daughter, a sister, and my wife. The focus and thoughtfulness you wife. The focus and thoughtfulness you wife. The focus and thoughtfulness you bring to every single day is something I bring to every single day is something I bring to every single day is something I try to live up to. Everyone sees the try to live up to. Everyone sees the try to live up to. Everyone sees the public side of you, but it's who you are public side of you, but it's who you are public side of you, but it's who you are in the quiet moments that really flaws in the quiet moments that really flaws in the quiet moments that really flaws me. You have this incredible patience me. You have this incredible patience me. You have this incredible patience and a way of listening that makes people and a way of listening that makes people and a way of listening that makes people feel completely safe. I've seen people feel completely safe. I've seen people feel completely safe. I've seen people who usually keep their guards way up, who usually keep their guards way up, who usually keep their guards way up, just let it go all around you. Finding a just let it go all around you. Finding a just let it go all around you. Finding a kind of healing they didn't know they kind of healing they didn't know they kind of healing they didn't know they needed. One of my favorite qualities needed. One of my favorite qualities needed. One of my favorite qualities about you is that you truly never judge. about you is that you truly never judge. about you is that you truly never judge. You just meet people where they're at You just meet people where they're at You just meet people where they're at and always find the good in people. and always find the good in people. and always find the good in people. That's a rare thing. You're a leader in That's a rare thing. You're a leader in That's a rare thing. You're a leader in every sense. In these last 8 years, I've every sense. In these last 8 years, I've every sense. In these last 8 years, I've watched you take on challenges that watched you take on challenges that watched you take on challenges that would have broken most people. Whether would have broken most people. Whether would have broken most people. Whether it's on a set or navigating the massive it's on a set or navigating the massive it's on a set or navigating the massive life change of moving countries and life change of moving countries and life change of moving countries and blending two very different worlds, you blending two very different worlds, you blending two very different worlds, you do it with a fire that honestly lights do it with a fire that honestly lights do it with a fire that honestly lights me up. You've stayed so true to your me up. You've stayed so true to your me up. You've stayed so true to your roots while adapting with a kindness roots while adapting with a kindness roots while adapting with a kindness that seems to never run out. I'm so that seems to never run out. I'm so that seems to never run out. I'm so incredibly proud of you. I know your dad incredibly proud of you. I know your dad incredibly proud of you. I know your dad is looking down with that same pride, is looking down with that same pride, is looking down with that same pride, seeing the woman you continue to be. As seeing the woman you continue to be. As seeing the woman you continue to be. As you talk with Jay today, and he better you talk with Jay today, and he better you talk with Jay today, and he better have those tissues ready. [laughter] have those tissues ready. [laughter] have those tissues ready. [laughter] Just know that Multimarie and I are Just know that Multimarie and I are Just know that Multimarie and I are right there with you. You're the center right there with you. You're the center right there with you. You're the center of our universe. Building this life with of our universe. Building this life with of our universe. Building this life with you is the greatest honor I have. you is the greatest honor I have. you is the greatest honor I have. Knowing we're a team gives me a sense of Knowing we're a team gives me a sense of Knowing we're a team gives me a sense of peace I can't even describe. No matter peace I can't even describe. No matter peace I can't even describe. No matter what life throws at us, I know we can what life throws at us, I know we can what life throws at us, I know we can handle it together. I love you handle it together. I love you handle it together. I love you endlessly, Nick Jonas. That's crazy, endlessly, Nick Jonas. That's crazy, endlessly, Nick Jonas. That's crazy, man. Where are those tissues? They're man. Where are those tissues? They're man. Where are those tissues? They're next to the said promised. next to the said promised. next to the said promised. >> I know. I'm like, I can't believe Nick. >> I know. I'm like, I can't believe Nick. >> I know. I'm like, I can't believe Nick. I know. I'm like, Nick, come on. You're I know. I'm like, Nick, come on. You're I know. I'm like, Nick, come on. You're like like like >> knows his wife knows what'll get me. >> knows his wife knows what'll get me. >> knows his wife knows what'll get me. >> It's beautiful. Um I I love your love. >> It's beautiful. Um I I love your love. >> It's beautiful. Um I I love your love. Uh long may it flourish and continue and Uh long may it flourish and continue and Uh long may it flourish and continue and thrive. And I'm so glad that Multi Marie thrive. And I'm so glad that Multi Marie thrive. And I'm so glad that Multi Marie has both of your love as well, and I has both of your love as well, and I has both of your love as well, and I hope that continues as well. Um you've hope that continues as well. Um you've hope that continues as well. Um you've been so kind. I hope that was a I know been so kind. I hope that was a I know been so kind. I hope that was a I know he says it to you every day probably he says it to you every day probably he says it to you every day probably anyway but um anyway but um anyway but um >> he is one to say it. >> he is one to say it. >> he is one to say it. >> He is one to say it. >> He is one to say it. >> He is one to say it. >> He is not one to not say it. And I think >> He is not one to not say it. And I think >> He is not one to not say it. And I think >> he promised me that very early in our >> he promised me that very early in our >> he promised me that very early in our engagement actually. [snorts] engagement actually. [snorts] engagement actually. [snorts] >> He said when he asked my mom for my hand >> He said when he asked my mom for my hand >> He said when he asked my mom for my hand in marriage, which he did before he even in marriage, which he did before he even in marriage, which he did before he even asked me. What a gentleman. Um, but he asked me. What a gentleman. Um, but he asked me. What a gentleman. Um, but he said, "I promised your mom that I'll said, "I promised your mom that I'll said, "I promised your mom that I'll always keep you happy, always keep you happy, always keep you happy, and that's going to be my quest is your and that's going to be my quest is your and that's going to be my quest is your happiness, and I'll always tell you how happiness, and I'll always tell you how happiness, and I'll always tell you how loved you are." loved you are." loved you are." >> And you can say that like when you just >> And you can say that like when you just >> And you can say that like when you just get married. get married. get married. >> Yeah. Yeah. Of course. >> Yeah. Yeah. Of course. >> Yeah. Yeah. Of course. >> But to keep up with it. >> But to keep up with it. >> But to keep up with it. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> And to make sure he tells me. >> And to make sure he tells me. >> And to make sure he tells me. >> Mhm. >> Mhm. >> Mhm. >> In little things. I was just I told you >> In little things. I was just I told you >> In little things. I was just I told you I was um I was um I was um >> I'm purging my house at the moment >> I'm purging my house at the moment >> I'm purging my house at the moment because we've just moved back to LA, because we've just moved back to LA, because we've just moved back to LA, right? I'm like switching it out for right? I'm like switching it out for right? I'm like switching it out for what's right for us now. So, I have this what's right for us now. So, I have this what's right for us now. So, I have this memory drawer in which I keep cards. I memory drawer in which I keep cards. I memory drawer in which I keep cards. I love the cards that people write me. I love the cards that people write me. I love the cards that people write me. I love a handwritten note. So, I was love a handwritten note. So, I was love a handwritten note. So, I was pulling out all my cards and they're all pulling out all my cards and they're all pulling out all my cards and they're all mixed up and all of these letters that mixed up and all of these letters that mixed up and all of these letters that Nick has written to me over the years Nick has written to me over the years Nick has written to me over the years and I put them all together and I was and I put them all together and I was and I put them all together and I was just reading them and right from the just reading them and right from the just reading them and right from the beginning beginning beginning >> he just always told me and you know it's >> he just always told me and you know it's >> he just always told me and you know it's the simplest thing but tell your loved the simplest thing but tell your loved the simplest thing but tell your loved ones you love them. ones you love them. ones you love them. >> It makes such a big difference. >> It makes such a big difference. >> It makes such a big difference. >> Absolutely. Such an important reminder >> Absolutely. Such an important reminder >> Absolutely. Such an important reminder and yeah, especially if you can write and yeah, especially if you can write and yeah, especially if you can write that well as well. [laughter] that well as well. [laughter] that well as well. [laughter] >> Marry a musician. >> Marry a musician. >> Marry a musician. >> Yeah, exactly. Exactly. [snorts] >> Yeah, exactly. Exactly. [snorts] >> Yeah, exactly. Exactly. [snorts] >> We we now end, you didn't do this last >> We we now end, you didn't do this last >> We we now end, you didn't do this last time, we end every episode with these time, we end every episode with these time, we end every episode with these two fun games that we created. One's two fun games that we created. One's two fun games that we created. One's called would you rather and the other called would you rather and the other called would you rather and the other one's gut reaction. one's gut reaction. one's gut reaction. >> Okay. >> Okay. >> Okay. >> So, would you rather is first up. So, >> So, would you rather is first up. So, >> So, would you rather is first up. So, Priyanka, this is your would you rather. Priyanka, this is your would you rather. Priyanka, this is your would you rather. >> Would you rather play the hero or the >> Would you rather play the hero or the >> Would you rather play the hero or the villain for the rest of your career villain for the rest of your career villain for the rest of your career >> in movies? >> in movies? >> in movies? >> Yeah, thank god. Yeah. I mean, I do love >> Yeah, thank god. Yeah. I mean, I do love >> Yeah, thank god. Yeah. I mean, I do love playing a bad guy, playing a bad guy, playing a bad guy, but it it would get boring for the rest but it it would get boring for the rest but it it would get boring for the rest of your life. Cuz I don't know how of your life. Cuz I don't know how of your life. Cuz I don't know how creative I could get. creative I could get. creative I could get. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. >> With how many bad guys, but I I'll say >> With how many bad guys, but I I'll say >> With how many bad guys, but I I'll say the villain. It's more interesting. the villain. It's more interesting. the villain. It's more interesting. >> Yeah. The bluff. >> Yeah. The bluff. >> Yeah. The bluff. >> Okay. >> Okay. >> Okay. >> Yeah. We're going to get to see you. >> Yeah. We're going to get to see you. >> Yeah. We're going to get to see you. >> Well, I'm not a villain in the movie. >> Well, I'm not a villain in the movie. >> Well, I'm not a villain in the movie. >> No, you're not. But, uh, we get to see >> No, you're not. But, uh, we get to see >> No, you're not. But, uh, we get to see you do a lot of crazy action scenes. you do a lot of crazy action scenes. you do a lot of crazy action scenes. >> Yeah. You know, it's so this movie which >> Yeah. You know, it's so this movie which >> Yeah. You know, it's so this movie which um I've I've done a lot of work with um I've I've done a lot of work with um I've I've done a lot of work with Amazon Prime and this is another one of Amazon Prime and this is another one of Amazon Prime and this is another one of our collaborations. But this movie is at our collaborations. But this movie is at our collaborations. But this movie is at such a pivotal point in my life because such a pivotal point in my life because such a pivotal point in my life because my character um is a former pirate who my character um is a former pirate who my character um is a former pirate who was known as Bloody Mary was known as Bloody Mary was known as Bloody Mary >> self-titled. I mean, you can tell why. >> self-titled. I mean, you can tell why. >> self-titled. I mean, you can tell why. Um she was tough and gruesome and based Um she was tough and gruesome and based Um she was tough and gruesome and based off of um like Grace Ali from Ireland off of um like Grace Ali from Ireland off of um like Grace Ali from Ireland and many other female pirates that did and many other female pirates that did and many other female pirates that did exist at that time whose lives were just exist at that time whose lives were just exist at that time whose lives were just insane. Like if you read the books, it's insane. Like if you read the books, it's insane. Like if you read the books, it's like I can't imagine being a female and like I can't imagine being a female and like I can't imagine being a female and a pirate at that time. But um why this a pirate at that time. But um why this a pirate at that time. But um why this movie really resonated with me is movie really resonated with me is movie really resonated with me is something I said earlier too in the something I said earlier too in the something I said earlier too in the podcast, which is how far would you go podcast, which is how far would you go podcast, which is how far would you go to protect your family? to protect your family? to protect your family? >> How far would you go to protect your >> How far would you go to protect your >> How far would you go to protect your children? And children? And children? And >> this is the story of a mother and a >> this is the story of a mother and a >> this is the story of a mother and a woman who says, "You're not coming for woman who says, "You're not coming for woman who says, "You're not coming for my family." my family." my family." >> One of the most amazing lines in this >> One of the most amazing lines in this >> One of the most amazing lines in this movie, which I really deeply resonated movie, which I really deeply resonated movie, which I really deeply resonated with, is you come to my home, you with, is you come to my home, you with, is you come to my home, you threaten my family, and then I kill him. threaten my family, and then I kill him. threaten my family, and then I kill him. And I say, "Where is my husband? Where And I say, "Where is my husband? Where And I say, "Where is my husband? Where is my husband?" Every wife when they're is my husband?" Every wife when they're is my husband?" Every wife when they're playing golf, isn't it? playing golf, isn't it? playing golf, isn't it? >> I [laughter] I love that. That's so >> I [laughter] I love that. That's so >> I [laughter] I love that. That's so good. good. good. >> But um you know I really >> But um you know I really >> But um you know I really >> it's it's that's what I love about this >> it's it's that's what I love about this >> it's it's that's what I love about this movie. It's really fun. It's like a movie. It's really fun. It's like a movie. It's really fun. It's like a bloody gory bloody gory bloody gory >> insane. It's like I love doing that. >> insane. It's like I love doing that. >> insane. It's like I love doing that. It's gory. It's got drama. It's It's gory. It's got drama. It's It's gory. It's got drama. It's >> beautifully shot. Um >> beautifully shot. Um >> beautifully shot. Um >> based in the Caribbean. >> based in the Caribbean. >> based in the Caribbean. >> What more could you ask? Our director >> What more could you ask? Our director >> What more could you ask? Our director was humongously talented. Um Frankie was humongously talented. Um Frankie was humongously talented. Um Frankie Flowers. Flowers. Flowers. >> Yeah, it's beautifully shot. >> Yeah, it's beautifully shot. >> Yeah, it's beautifully shot. >> What would you do? How far would you go? >> What would you do? How far would you go? >> What would you do? How far would you go? >> And you've lived through that in your >> And you've lived through that in your >> And you've lived through that in your own version of that. Yeah. own version of that. Yeah. own version of that. Yeah. >> And I will continue to >> And I will continue to >> And I will continue to >> like I would go to the ends of the earth >> like I would go to the ends of the earth >> like I would go to the ends of the earth to protect. to protect. to protect. >> I saw that in your eye when you said >> I saw that in your eye when you said >> I saw that in your eye when you said that. I was like, "Wow, do not mess your that. I was like, "Wow, do not mess your that. I was like, "Wow, do not mess your hand." And your eyes are like, "Jay, do hand." And your eyes are like, "Jay, do hand." And your eyes are like, "Jay, do not." And I'm like, I'm like trying to not." And I'm like, I'm like trying to not." And I'm like, I'm like trying to be family. I'm like, "This [laughter] is be family. I'm like, "This [laughter] is be family. I'm like, "This [laughter] is like, you know, this is uh that was I like, you know, this is uh that was I like, you know, this is uh that was I saw that in your eye. You're like you're saw that in your eye. You're like you're saw that in your eye. You're like you're like fully locked in there and and I was like fully locked in there and and I was like fully locked in there and and I was like, "Okay, I'm scared now." All right. like, "Okay, I'm scared now." All right. like, "Okay, I'm scared now." All right. Would you rather have to wear your Would you rather have to wear your Would you rather have to wear your MissWorld crown to every major Hollywood MissWorld crown to every major Hollywood MissWorld crown to every major Hollywood premiere for the next year or have to premiere for the next year or have to premiere for the next year or have to introduce yourself as MissWorld 2000 in introduce yourself as MissWorld 2000 in introduce yourself as MissWorld 2000 in every room you enter? every room you enter? every room you enter? >> Oh, neither. Oh, no. That's the worst. >> Oh, neither. Oh, no. That's the worst. >> Oh, neither. Oh, no. That's the worst. Um, one should be a Miss World choice Um, one should be a Miss World choice Um, one should be a Miss World choice and the other one shouldn't be. Um, and the other one shouldn't be. Um, and the other one shouldn't be. Um, neither. I I'm very proud of that neither. I I'm very proud of that neither. I I'm very proud of that achievement for my 18-year-old self at achievement for my 18-year-old self at achievement for my 18-year-old self at that time, but it's not something I that time, but it's not something I that time, but it's not something I would care to do again. would care to do again. would care to do again. >> Okay. [laughter] >> Okay. [laughter] >> Okay. [laughter] Uh, would you rather accidentally send a Uh, would you rather accidentally send a Uh, would you rather accidentally send a flirty voice note meant for Nick to your flirty voice note meant for Nick to your flirty voice note meant for Nick to your entire production group chat or entire production group chat or entire production group chat or accidentally read one of your own accidentally read one of your own accidentally read one of your own romantic texts out loud thinking it was romantic texts out loud thinking it was romantic texts out loud thinking it was part of the script during a table read? part of the script during a table read? part of the script during a table read? >> Well, I wouldn't do that, [laughter] >> Well, I wouldn't do that, [laughter] >> Well, I wouldn't do that, [laughter] but um I may have even done this. Like I but um I may have even done this. Like I but um I may have even done this. Like I am notoriously known for sending the am notoriously known for sending the am notoriously known for sending the wrong messages to the wrong people. wrong messages to the wrong people. wrong messages to the wrong people. >> Okay, got it. >> Okay, got it. >> Okay, got it. >> So um I think it would be funny. >> So um I think it would be funny. >> So um I think it would be funny. >> Yeah. [laughter] Yeah, >> Yeah. [laughter] Yeah, >> Yeah. [laughter] Yeah, >> I think it would be hilarious. >> I think it would be hilarious. >> I think it would be hilarious. >> Yeah. All right, this one, this one >> Yeah. All right, this one, this one >> Yeah. All right, this one, this one applies to the bluff as well. Would you applies to the bluff as well. Would you applies to the bluff as well. Would you rather film a brutal stunt sequence in rather film a brutal stunt sequence in rather film a brutal stunt sequence in one take, absolutely nail it, but get one take, absolutely nail it, but get one take, absolutely nail it, but get injured and never be allowed to do your injured and never be allowed to do your injured and never be allowed to do your own stunts again, or play it safe, let a own stunts again, or play it safe, let a own stunts again, or play it safe, let a stunt double take over, and always stunt double take over, and always stunt double take over, and always wonder if you could have done it wonder if you could have done it wonder if you could have done it yourself? yourself? yourself? >> I have done enough work with incredible >> I have done enough work with incredible >> I have done enough work with incredible stunt teams to know when I can and when stunt teams to know when I can and when stunt teams to know when I can and when I can't. I can't. I can't. >> Wow. >> Wow. >> Wow. >> I'm very, very safe and practical. >> I'm very, very safe and practical. >> I'm very, very safe and practical. >> I'm not a hero when it comes to set. I >> I'm not a hero when it comes to set. I >> I'm not a hero when it comes to set. I don't need to prove a point. I'm a don't need to prove a point. I'm a don't need to prove a point. I'm a professional. [laughter] I go to set. I professional. [laughter] I go to set. I professional. [laughter] I go to set. I see what I have to do. The bluff see what I have to do. The bluff see what I have to do. The bluff especially. In fact, there's a lot of especially. In fact, there's a lot of especially. In fact, there's a lot of one-take scenes and a lot of injuries one-take scenes and a lot of injuries one-take scenes and a lot of injuries that I did get in this movie. But that I did get in this movie. But that I did get in this movie. But because it's a dramatic performance of because it's a dramatic performance of because it's a dramatic performance of a, you know, stunt movie, it really a, you know, stunt movie, it really a, you know, stunt movie, it really required my face in everything. It required my face in everything. It required my face in everything. It required me to convey the emotion of required me to convey the emotion of required me to convey the emotion of what I was feeling while I was in the what I was feeling while I was in the what I was feeling while I was in the stunt scenes. So, I did a lot of it stunt scenes. So, I did a lot of it stunt scenes. So, I did a lot of it myself. I was trained by um an myself. I was trained by um an myself. I was trained by um an incredible stunt team. My stunt incredible stunt team. My stunt incredible stunt team. My stunt coordinator and double Anisha Gibbs coordinator and double Anisha Gibbs coordinator and double Anisha Gibbs worked with me very very closely. In worked with me very very closely. In worked with me very very closely. In fact, we shot a whole year. Um the first fact, we shot a whole year. Um the first fact, we shot a whole year. Um the first three months was Heads of State. While I three months was Heads of State. While I three months was Heads of State. While I was filming Heads of State, I was was filming Heads of State, I was was filming Heads of State, I was training for the training for the training for the >> bluff movie. That was great. >> bluff movie. That was great. >> bluff movie. That was great. >> Thank you. >> Thank you. >> Thank you. >> Yeah, it was so much fun. >> Yeah, it was so much fun. >> Yeah, it was so much fun. >> It was so fun. >> It was so fun. >> It was so fun. >> It was so much fun. >> It was so much fun. >> It was so much fun. >> So in between shots, we would train the >> So in between shots, we would train the >> So in between shots, we would train the sword fighting sequences sword fighting sequences sword fighting sequences on set. So Idris and John would be like on set. So Idris and John would be like on set. So Idris and John would be like we don't use swords in this movie we don't use swords in this movie we don't use swords in this movie [laughter] [laughter] [laughter] but we would be training for the next but we would be training for the next but we would be training for the next one. Right after I finished that in one. Right after I finished that in one. Right after I finished that in France I flew to Australia 10 days or France I flew to Australia 10 days or France I flew to Australia 10 days or seven days in and started filming the seven days in and started filming the seven days in and started filming the bluff which was for 3 months. So it was bluff which was for 3 months. So it was bluff which was for 3 months. So it was just so intense and you were right in. just so intense and you were right in. just so intense and you were right in. Um training happened while filming. Um training happened while filming. Um training happened while filming. >> Wow. >> Wow. >> Wow. >> Learning choreography happened while >> Learning choreography happened while >> Learning choreography happened while filming. So I would get like a few hours filming. So I would get like a few hours filming. So I would get like a few hours off after finishing a scene and I would off after finishing a scene and I would off after finishing a scene and I would go learn my coro or in between shots. So go learn my coro or in between shots. So go learn my coro or in between shots. So it was just like very alive and creative it was just like very alive and creative it was just like very alive and creative and but I'm very safe like I learned and but I'm very safe like I learned and but I'm very safe like I learned very early in my career that the person very early in my career that the person very early in my career that the person doing the stunt you have to walk your doing the stunt you have to walk your doing the stunt you have to walk your path even if your stunt double checked path even if your stunt double checked path even if your stunt double checked it for you. You walk your path. You see it for you. You walk your path. You see it for you. You walk your path. You see if there's you know a nail coming out if there's you know a nail coming out if there's you know a nail coming out from somewhere if you could get injured. from somewhere if you could get injured. from somewhere if you could get injured. If you know where you're falling doesn't If you know where you're falling doesn't If you know where you're falling doesn't have like a protrusion. Like you have to have like a protrusion. Like you have to have like a protrusion. Like you have to be really practical in order to be able be really practical in order to be able be really practical in order to be able to pull off stunts and stuff like that. to pull off stunts and stuff like that. to pull off stunts and stuff like that. You can't be a hero. You can't be a hero. You can't be a hero. >> I like I like the pragmatism and the >> I like I like the pragmatism and the >> I like I like the pragmatism and the practicality. Very useful. practicality. Very useful. practicality. Very useful. >> Can't be a hero. >> Can't be a hero. >> Can't be a hero. >> Great answer. All right, one last one of >> Great answer. All right, one last one of >> Great answer. All right, one last one of would you rather and then we've got would you rather and then we've got would you rather and then we've got reaction. So would you rather perform? I reaction. So would you rather perform? I reaction. So would you rather perform? I think I know the answer to this one think I know the answer to this one think I know the answer to this one because I saw you already do this and it because I saw you already do this and it because I saw you already do this and it was amazing. Would you rather perform was amazing. Would you rather perform was amazing. Would you rather perform one full Jonas Brothers song on stage by one full Jonas Brothers song on stage by one full Jonas Brothers song on stage by yourself? yourself? yourself? >> What? in front of a soldout stadium or >> What? in front of a soldout stadium or >> What? in front of a soldout stadium or open a Jonas Brothers show with a five open a Jonas Brothers show with a five open a Jonas Brothers show with a five minute standout monologue about your minute standout monologue about your minute standout monologue about your relationship. relationship. relationship. >> I'll do the monologue. >> I'll do the monologue. >> I'll do the monologue. >> You did so good on the roast. [laughter] >> You did so good on the roast. [laughter] >> You did so good on the roast. [laughter] The roast is so good. That is hands down The roast is so good. That is hands down The roast is so good. That is hands down still one of my favorite clips of you. still one of my favorite clips of you. still one of my favorite clips of you. >> Can I tell you a secret? >> Can I tell you a secret? >> Can I tell you a secret? >> Yeah, please. >> Yeah, please. >> Yeah, please. >> Nick wrote my roast. >> Nick wrote my roast. >> Nick wrote my roast. >> No. Did he actually No, don't tell us >> No. Did he actually No, don't tell us >> No. Did he actually No, don't tell us that. Don't ruin it. It was so good. that. Don't ruin it. It was so good. that. Don't ruin it. It was so good. >> But I'm not ruining it. That's our >> But I'm not ruining it. That's our >> But I'm not ruining it. That's our partnership. partnership. partnership. >> Yeah, that's your partnership. But your >> Yeah, that's your partnership. But your >> Yeah, that's your partnership. But your delivery was brilliant. delivery was brilliant. delivery was brilliant. >> Thank you. I mean, he didn't write all >> Thank you. I mean, he didn't write all >> Thank you. I mean, he didn't write all of it. He wrote he brought in a lot of of it. He wrote he brought in a lot of of it. He wrote he brought in a lot of amazing contributions amazing contributions amazing contributions >> um to an original comedy too. What what >> um to an original comedy too. What what >> um to an original comedy too. What what can't this guy do? can't this guy do? can't this guy do? >> He knows his wife like he wanted to set >> He knows his wife like he wanted to set >> He knows his wife like he wanted to set me up for success and he was like you me up for success and he was like you me up for success and he was like you need to lean into this joke. You need to need to lean into this joke. You need to need to lean into this joke. You need to say that and I was like no I don't want say that and I was like no I don't want say that and I was like no I don't want to address that. He was like the to address that. He was like the to address that. He was like the Instagram thing was all Nick. Instagram thing was all Nick. Instagram thing was all Nick. >> It was such a good >> It was such a good >> It was such a good >> where he was like you have the most >> where he was like you have the most >> where he was like you have the most Instagram followers of all three of us Instagram followers of all three of us Instagram followers of all three of us combined. And I was like I'm not saying combined. And I was like I'm not saying combined. And I was like I'm not saying that on your that on your that on your >> that was so good though. >> that was so good though. >> that was so good though. >> And he was like you have to say it. Um, >> And he was like you have to say it. Um, >> And he was like you have to say it. Um, so you know he he like he was like so you know he he like he was like so you know he he like he was like >> and yeah that's our partnership where >> and yeah that's our partnership where >> and yeah that's our partnership where you know we want to set each other up you know we want to set each other up you know we want to set each other up for success and for success and for success and >> I love that. What a >> I love that. What a >> I love that. What a >> such a beautiful moment for me where he >> such a beautiful moment for me where he >> such a beautiful moment for me where he just like came up with just like came up with just like came up with >> his own roast. >> his own roast. >> his own roast. >> That's awesome. They were great jokes. >> That's awesome. They were great jokes. >> That's awesome. They were great jokes. They they landed so well. They they landed so well. They they landed so well. >> Thank you. >> Thank you. >> Thank you. >> All right. Gut reaction to your >> All right. Gut reaction to your >> All right. Gut reaction to your instinctual response because you did the instinctual response because you did the instinctual response because you did the final five with us last time. So we we final five with us last time. So we we final five with us last time. So we we made this up for you. Uh, the thing I made this up for you. Uh, the thing I made this up for you. Uh, the thing I pretend I'm chill about, but I'm not, is most things. [laughter] most things. [laughter] I literally come across as the most I literally come across as the most I literally come across as the most chill and most confident, but inside I'm chill and most confident, but inside I'm chill and most confident, but inside I'm I'm like a duck I'm like a duck I'm like a duck >> under the water, but up front you don't >> under the water, but up front you don't >> under the water, but up front you don't see anything. So, I'm stressed about see anything. So, I'm stressed about see anything. So, I'm stressed about most things. The most unhinged thought most things. The most unhinged thought most things. The most unhinged thought I've had this week was I've had this week was I've had this week was [laughter] [laughter] [laughter] >> it's not unhinged, but it's an honest >> it's not unhinged, but it's an honest >> it's not unhinged, but it's an honest thought. thought. thought. >> Yeah. Just came up actually in your >> Yeah. Just came up actually in your >> Yeah. Just came up actually in your library. library. library. >> Oh, God. God. >> Oh, God. God. >> Oh, God. God. >> So, when I we first moved into our >> So, when I we first moved into our >> So, when I we first moved into our house, I was filming a lot and you know, house, I was filming a lot and you know, house, I was filming a lot and you know, we had people who were doing the we had people who were doing the we had people who were doing the interiors um and helping us with the interiors um and helping us with the interiors um and helping us with the interiors of our home. So when I I have interiors of our home. So when I I have interiors of our home. So when I I have a library which is my pride and joy and a library which is my pride and joy and a library which is my pride and joy and um so I walked into the library and the um so I walked into the library and the um so I walked into the library and the books were colorcoded and I was like books were colorcoded and I was like books were colorcoded and I was like what are you doing whose library is what are you doing whose library is what are you doing whose library is colorcoded colorcoded colorcoded your [laughter] library was colorcoded? your [laughter] library was colorcoded? your [laughter] library was colorcoded? I was like JJ do you read your books I was like JJ do you read your books I was like JJ do you read your books >> or just pretty? >> or just pretty? >> or just pretty? >> That's so good. That's so good. >> That's so good. That's so good. >> That's so good. That's so good. >> Do you actually read them? >> Do you actually read them? >> Do you actually read them? >> I love it. I'm glad. Thank you for being >> I love it. I'm glad. Thank you for being >> I love it. I'm glad. Thank you for being honest. This is good. I like it. I like honest. This is good. I like it. I like honest. This is good. I like it. I like it. That's good. Well, I have two. it. That's good. Well, I have two. it. That's good. Well, I have two. You'll see the one in the house when we You'll see the one in the house when we You'll see the one in the house when we go there later today. So that's my go there later today. So that's my go there later today. So that's my bookshelf. That's my proud and joy. It's bookshelf. That's my proud and joy. It's bookshelf. That's my proud and joy. It's all mixed and messed up and everything. all mixed and messed up and everything. all mixed and messed up and everything. >> See, that's >> See, that's >> See, that's >> and this was like during Zoom days of >> and this was like during Zoom days of >> and this was like during Zoom days of pandemic. So it's like everything's pandemic. So it's like everything's pandemic. So it's like everything's Yeah, exactly. You can tell. So funny. Yeah, exactly. You can tell. So funny. Yeah, exactly. You can tell. So funny. >> Uh great answer. Great answer. Um the >> Uh great answer. Great answer. Um the >> Uh great answer. Great answer. Um the most humbling mom moment I've recently most humbling mom moment I've recently most humbling mom moment I've recently had was had was had was >> So being a working mom is tough. I saw >> So being a working mom is tough. I saw >> So being a working mom is tough. I saw my mom being a working mom. I and her my mom being a working mom. I and her my mom being a working mom. I and her mom. So I know it's doable. Whenever me mom. So I know it's doable. Whenever me mom. So I know it's doable. Whenever me or my husband leave, either one of us or my husband leave, either one of us or my husband leave, either one of us are with Malti. So if I'm traveling, are with Malti. So if I'm traveling, are with Malti. So if I'm traveling, he's with her or we have the he's with her or we have the he's with her or we have the grandparents u my in-laws who are grandparents u my in-laws who are grandparents u my in-laws who are beautiful and gracious while I'm doing beautiful and gracious while I'm doing beautiful and gracious while I'm doing this press tour there with our daughter. this press tour there with our daughter. this press tour there with our daughter. >> Um or my mom but uh I was packing up and >> Um or my mom but uh I was packing up and >> Um or my mom but uh I was packing up and I was leaving for a film shoot. I'm I was leaving for a film shoot. I'm I was leaving for a film shoot. I'm working on an Indian movie called working on an Indian movie called working on an Indian movie called Baranasi in Hyderabad. Baranasi in Hyderabad. Baranasi in Hyderabad. >> Yeah, congrats. So excited for this. >> Yeah, congrats. So excited for this. >> Yeah, congrats. So excited for this. This is huge. I just want to point out This is huge. I just want to point out This is huge. I just want to point out for everyone who doesn't know it's like for everyone who doesn't know it's like for everyone who doesn't know it's like there's a gentleman who made RRaj Moly there's a gentleman who made RRaj Moly there's a gentleman who made RRaj Moly Rajim. Yeah. Who's making uh Vanasi and Rajim. Yeah. Who's making uh Vanasi and Rajim. Yeah. Who's making uh Vanasi and so it's amazing. Congratulations. so it's amazing. Congratulations. so it's amazing. Congratulations. >> Great part and incredible movie and >> Great part and incredible movie and >> Great part and incredible movie and great partners in the movie. great partners in the movie. great partners in the movie. >> So I've had to fly back and forth from >> So I've had to fly back and forth from >> So I've had to fly back and forth from Hyderabad like every month because I Hyderabad like every month because I Hyderabad like every month because I come back to Malti. Um yeah I literally come back to Malti. Um yeah I literally come back to Malti. Um yeah I literally my airline status has gone up because of my airline status has gone up because of my airline status has gone up because of this one movie. Um, but I was leaving this one movie. Um, but I was leaving this one movie. Um, but I was leaving and I was packing up and before I leave and I was packing up and before I leave and I was packing up and before I leave for a trip, we talk about it and we have for a trip, we talk about it and we have for a trip, we talk about it and we have this invisible string which is in her this invisible string which is in her this invisible string which is in her heart and my heart and you know we talk heart and my heart and you know we talk heart and my heart and you know we talk about the fact that mom has gone for about the fact that mom has gone for about the fact that mom has gone for like 12 sleeps or 15 sleeps and like 12 sleeps or 15 sleeps and like 12 sleeps or 15 sleeps and >> um so we were having that chat and >> um so we were having that chat and >> um so we were having that chat and whenever she has real feelings she talks whenever she has real feelings she talks whenever she has real feelings she talks to her babies because she is a mama um to her babies because she is a mama um to her babies because she is a mama um and she has little dollies which are her and she has little dollies which are her and she has little dollies which are her babies and um so when I was leaving she babies and um so when I was leaving she babies and um so when I was leaving she was looking at her BNC says, "I'm such a was looking at her BNC says, "I'm such a was looking at her BNC says, "I'm such a good mama. I don't leave you and go to good mama. I don't leave you and go to good mama. I don't leave you and go to work." work." work." >> She was three and a half that time. >> She was three and a half that time. >> She was three and a half that time. >> Oh my gosh, that's heartbreaking. >> Oh my gosh, that's heartbreaking. >> Oh my gosh, that's heartbreaking. >> So, what was the question again? >> So, what was the question again? >> So, what was the question again? [laughter] [laughter] [laughter] >> Yeah, that was my >> Yeah, that was my >> Yeah, that was my >> That is the most humbling moment. Wow. >> That is the most humbling moment. Wow. >> That is the most humbling moment. Wow. >> I was like, "My toes curled. I was >> I was like, "My toes curled. I was >> I was like, "My toes curled. I was almost about to cancel my flight." almost about to cancel my flight." almost about to cancel my flight." >> Oh my god. >> Oh my god. >> Oh my god. >> I was so stressed out. And then she >> I was so stressed out. And then she >> I was so stressed out. And then she laughed and smiled at me. She knew it laughed and smiled at me. She knew it laughed and smiled at me. She knew it was a joke, was a joke, was a joke, >> you know. She jumped on me and I was >> you know. She jumped on me and I was >> you know. She jumped on me and I was like, "Don't say that." And she was like, "Don't say that." And she was like, "Don't say that." And she was like, "No, mama. No." Like, she doesn't like, "No, mama. No." Like, she doesn't like, "No, mama. No." Like, she doesn't like getting me or Nick or any of us like getting me or Nick or any of us like getting me or Nick or any of us like upset. She's very sensitive to like upset. She's very sensitive to like upset. She's very sensitive to that. that. that. >> Um, so, but I was like I was thinking >> Um, so, but I was like I was thinking >> Um, so, but I was like I was thinking about it the whole flight to Hyderabad. about it the whole flight to Hyderabad. about it the whole flight to Hyderabad. I was like, "Oh my gosh, trust your I was like, "Oh my gosh, trust your I was like, "Oh my gosh, trust your child to humble you." child to humble you." child to humble you." >> Yeah, that is one that is painful. >> Yeah, that is one that is painful. >> Yeah, that is one that is painful. That's heartbreaking. That's not even That's heartbreaking. That's not even That's heartbreaking. That's not even humbling. That's just heartbreaking. I'm humbling. That's just heartbreaking. I'm humbling. That's just heartbreaking. I'm like, like, like, >> so tough. >> so tough. >> so tough. >> I know. If I ever have a little girl, >> I know. If I ever have a little girl, >> I know. If I ever have a little girl, I'm going to be wrapped around. I figure I'm going to be wrapped around. I figure I'm going to be wrapped around. I figure that's going to be so it's over. that's going to be so it's over. that's going to be so it's over. >> It's so hard >> It's so hard >> It's so hard >> cuz they have that little voice and >> cuz they have that little voice and >> cuz they have that little voice and those eyes. those eyes. those eyes. >> It's just over. >> It's just over. >> It's just over. >> That's crazy. That's crazy. How does it >> That's crazy. That's crazy. How does it >> That's crazy. That's crazy. How does it feel to be going back to India to do a feel to be going back to India to do a feel to be going back to India to do a movie again after so many years? movie again after so many years? movie again after so many years? >> If there was any film to be done, it >> If there was any film to be done, it >> If there was any film to be done, it would have been this. Like this is the would have been this. Like this is the would have been this. Like this is the best way of [clears throat] going back best way of [clears throat] going back best way of [clears throat] going back >> into Indian films. I missed it so much. >> into Indian films. I missed it so much. >> into Indian films. I missed it so much. I missed I missed I missed >> you know dancing. I missed the chaos on >> you know dancing. I missed the chaos on >> you know dancing. I missed the chaos on set. I missed the creativity and um with set. I missed the creativity and um with set. I missed the creativity and um with SS Raja sir he's so his mind is and his SS Raja sir he's so his mind is and his SS Raja sir he's so his mind is and his vision is so far beyond vision is so far beyond vision is so far beyond >> limited imagination that um just to be >> limited imagination that um just to be >> limited imagination that um just to be able to see what he's thinking and and able to see what he's thinking and and able to see what he's thinking and and kind of be the vessel to tell that story kind of be the vessel to tell that story kind of be the vessel to tell that story is great. My part is amazing. I have is great. My part is amazing. I have is great. My part is amazing. I have like a beautiful graph of ups and downs like a beautiful graph of ups and downs like a beautiful graph of ups and downs in the movie. Um, my co-acctors are in the movie. Um, my co-acctors are in the movie. Um, my co-acctors are great. You know, it's awesome to be able great. You know, it's awesome to be able great. You know, it's awesome to be able to work with actors who like know their to work with actors who like know their to work with actors who like know their stuff, arrive, you know, on time, like stuff, arrive, you know, on time, like stuff, arrive, you know, on time, like are great to be around, are fun, and, are great to be around, are fun, and, are great to be around, are fun, and, you know, it's it's been a really really you know, it's it's been a really really you know, it's it's been a really really gratifying journey so far. It's long. gratifying journey so far. It's long. gratifying journey so far. It's long. >> Mhm. >> Mhm. >> Mhm. >> He takes a long time to make movies. >> He takes a long time to make movies. >> He takes a long time to make movies. It's almost been 14 months but you know It's almost been 14 months but you know It's almost been 14 months but you know it's going to be really special and the it's going to be really special and the it's going to be really special and the journey of it has also been special. In journey of it has also been special. In journey of it has also been special. In fact I took Malti to Hyderabad once and fact I took Malti to Hyderabad once and fact I took Malti to Hyderabad once and she went to the farm and she saw like um she went to the farm and she saw like um she went to the farm and she saw like um they had this beautiful farm outside of they had this beautiful farm outside of they had this beautiful farm outside of Hyderabad which you know sir his wife Hyderabad which you know sir his wife Hyderabad which you know sir his wife his family they like run themselves and his family they like run themselves and his family they like run themselves and it was so much fun you know she met like it was so much fun you know she met like it was so much fun you know she met like calves and saw patty fields and like ran calves and saw patty fields and like ran calves and saw patty fields and like ran around and it was beautiful. I love it. around and it was beautiful. I love it. around and it was beautiful. I love it. I'm so excited for you, for the bluff, I'm so excited for you, for the bluff, I'm so excited for you, for the bluff, for Marinasi, for your family. It's uh for Marinasi, for your family. It's uh for Marinasi, for your family. It's uh congratulations on it all. And thank you congratulations on it all. And thank you congratulations on it all. And thank you today for just, you know, sharing it as today for just, you know, sharing it as today for just, you know, sharing it as it is and what's going on behind the it is and what's going on behind the it is and what's going on behind the scenes and scenes and scenes and >> what all did I say? >> what all did I say? >> what all did I say? >> What's what's happening? You know, >> What's what's happening? You know, >> What's what's happening? You know, what's what's really going on? You can what's what's really going on? You can what's what's really going on? You can tell me offline if we, you know, got tell me offline if we, you know, got tell me offline if we, you know, got there. there. there. >> I don't know. I don't like that's the >> I don't know. I don't like that's the >> I don't know. I don't like that's the thing about you. thing about you. thing about you. >> Yes. one, when I'm doing an interview, I >> Yes. one, when I'm doing an interview, I >> Yes. one, when I'm doing an interview, I try not to think about it. But you also try not to think about it. But you also try not to think about it. But you also like have this amazing innate quality of like have this amazing innate quality of like have this amazing innate quality of being able to like get people to talk being able to like get people to talk being able to like get people to talk about tough things without about tough things without about tough things without >> very sweet >> very sweet >> very sweet >> feeling >> feeling >> feeling judged or without feeling critiqued. I judged or without feeling critiqued. I judged or without feeling critiqued. I don't know what'll happen when these don't know what'll happen when these don't know what'll happen when these clips come out, [laughter] but while clips come out, [laughter] but while clips come out, [laughter] but while we're on this couch, it's real good. we're on this couch, it's real good. we're on this couch, it's real good. >> Oh gosh. Well, no. I my my only >> Oh gosh. Well, no. I my my only >> Oh gosh. Well, no. I my my only intention is just that, you know, that intention is just that, you know, that intention is just that, you know, that that people get to talk about the things that people get to talk about the things that people get to talk about the things they don't get to talk about anywhere they don't get to talk about anywhere they don't get to talk about anywhere else and and people get to really else and and people get to really else and and people get to really understand what's going on when we think understand what's going on when we think understand what's going on when we think we know everything. I think we live in a we know everything. I think we live in a we know everything. I think we live in a world right now where we we think we world right now where we we think we world right now where we we think we know what everyone's going through. We know what everyone's going through. We know what everyone's going through. We think we know what everyone believes think we know what everyone believes think we know what everyone believes >> and and it's nice to have an opportunity >> and and it's nice to have an opportunity >> and and it's nice to have an opportunity to create space and I think it's not to create space and I think it's not to create space and I think it's not just creating space for each other but just creating space for each other but just creating space for each other but hopefully this ripples out into people hopefully this ripples out into people hopefully this ripples out into people creating space in their families and creating space in their families and creating space in their families and their friends and their friends and their friends and >> amongst each other is >> amongst each other is >> amongst each other is >> giving each other benefit of the doubt. >> giving each other benefit of the doubt. >> giving each other benefit of the doubt. >> Yeah. Some grace and space >> Yeah. Some grace and space >> Yeah. Some grace and space >> some goodness believing in people's >> some goodness believing in people's >> some goodness believing in people's >> goodness. I used to think actually Nick >> goodness. I used to think actually Nick >> goodness. I used to think actually Nick writes this in his letter, but I used to writes this in his letter, but I used to writes this in his letter, but I used to think that was like one of my worst think that was like one of my worst think that was like one of my worst qualities because you I I'm the worst qualities because you I I'm the worst qualities because you I I'm the worst judge of people. I always judge of people. I always judge of people. I always see people for the good in them. Like I see people for the good in them. Like I see people for the good in them. Like I don't understand like why would you have don't understand like why would you have don't understand like why would you have a bad agenda? a bad agenda? a bad agenda? >> Yeah. Right. Right. >> Yeah. Right. Right. >> Yeah. Right. Right. >> Like why would >> Like why would >> Like why would like [clears throat] that too? Yeah. like [clears throat] that too? Yeah. like [clears throat] that too? Yeah. >> It doesn't make sense in my brain. Like >> It doesn't make sense in my brain. Like >> It doesn't make sense in my brain. Like why would you say something to me that why would you say something to me that why would you say something to me that you don't mean? you don't mean? you don't mean? >> Mhm. >> Mhm. >> Mhm. >> Mhm. That's so convoluted and exhausting >> Mhm. That's so convoluted and exhausting >> Mhm. That's so convoluted and exhausting to think about like but there are people to think about like but there are people to think about like but there are people like that in the world and as I've like that in the world and as I've like that in the world and as I've navigated you know many different navigated you know many different navigated you know many different countries you have to and I'm raising a countries you have to and I'm raising a countries you have to and I'm raising a daughter like I want to be able to equip daughter like I want to be able to equip daughter like I want to be able to equip her her her >> to protect herself and sometimes that >> to protect herself and sometimes that >> to protect herself and sometimes that kind of transparency or just you know oh kind of transparency or just you know oh kind of transparency or just you know oh my gosh what you're saying is probably my gosh what you're saying is probably my gosh what you're saying is probably what I'm getting is not the right thing what I'm getting is not the right thing what I'm getting is not the right thing because you know there are tricky people because you know there are tricky people because you know there are tricky people in the world in the world in the world >> but Um it's just tough on me. I've just >> but Um it's just tough on me. I've just >> but Um it's just tough on me. I've just never been able to navigate that very never been able to navigate that very never been able to navigate that very well. well. well. >> Yeah, that's a good quality as well. >> Yeah, that's a good quality as well. >> Yeah, that's a good quality as well. >> Is it though? It's a little too >> Is it though? It's a little too >> Is it though? It's a little too trusting, I think. trusting, I think. trusting, I think. >> Yeah, it's it's I mean, I guess as long >> Yeah, it's it's I mean, I guess as long >> Yeah, it's it's I mean, I guess as long as you have good boundaries when you as you have good boundaries when you as you have good boundaries when you discover something, I think that's the discover something, I think that's the discover something, I think that's the problem is the discovery. problem is the discovery. problem is the discovery. >> Yeah, the discovery could be terrible. >> Yeah, the discovery could be terrible. >> Yeah, the discovery could be terrible. It depends on It depends on It depends on >> or you never discover it. Some people >> or you never discover it. Some people >> or you never discover it. Some people are really good at maintaining, you are really good at maintaining, you are really good at maintaining, you know. know. know. >> Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. >> Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. >> Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. >> Like two-faced nature or whatever. >> Like two-faced nature or whatever. >> Like two-faced nature or whatever. >> Yes. My husband's great. Oh my god, he's >> Yes. My husband's great. Oh my god, he's >> Yes. My husband's great. Oh my god, he's the best judge of character. the best judge of character. the best judge of character. >> I don't know why he says that about me. >> I don't know why he says that about me. >> I don't know why he says that about me. I I like can't tell. [laughter] I I like can't tell. [laughter] I I like can't tell. [laughter] >> I'll tell after you show me your cards, >> I'll tell after you show me your cards, >> I'll tell after you show me your cards, like after someone does something. I'm like after someone does something. I'm like after someone does something. I'm like like like >> that's Yeah. Yeah. >> that's Yeah. Yeah. >> that's Yeah. Yeah. >> But I cannot tell without that. >> But I cannot tell without that. >> But I cannot tell without that. [laughter] [laughter] [laughter] >> Well, you're a great part, great team, >> Well, you're a great part, great team, >> Well, you're a great part, great team, great partnership. Uh Brian, it's been a great partnership. Uh Brian, it's been a great partnership. Uh Brian, it's been a joy. Truly, it's been such a joy talking joy. Truly, it's been such a joy talking joy. Truly, it's been such a joy talking to you again. I'm so glad to have you to you again. I'm so glad to have you to you again. I'm so glad to have you back on after 5 years. Please do not back on after 5 years. Please do not back on after 5 years. Please do not wait 5 years. Please do not wait 5 years wait 5 years. Please do not wait 5 years wait 5 years. Please do not wait 5 years to come back. I hope you come back to come back. I hope you come back to come back. I hope you come back sooner for sure. sooner for sure. sooner for sure. >> I'm glad to be here actually in the >> I'm glad to be here actually in the >> I'm glad to be here actually in the studio instead of doing it virtually. studio instead of doing it virtually. studio instead of doing it virtually. >> Absolutely. You're the best. >> Absolutely. You're the best. >> Absolutely. You're the best. Congratulations. Thank you. You too. Oh, Congratulations. Thank you. You too. Oh, Congratulations. Thank you. You too. Oh, you're doing production now. Coming to you're doing production now. Coming to you're doing production now. Coming to my side announced. Yeah. Yeah. It's so my side announced. Yeah. Yeah. It's so my side announced. Yeah. Yeah. It's so having so much fun with it. having so much fun with it. having so much fun with it. >> Are you? >> Are you? >> Are you? >> It's like, you know, when when you grow >> It's like, you know, when when you grow >> It's like, you know, when when you grow up where I grew up in London, up where I grew up in London, up where I grew up in London, >> I would never have believed in a million >> I would never have believed in a million >> I would never have believed in a million years that I'd ever have the opportunity years that I'd ever have the opportunity years that I'd ever have the opportunity to do something like this, especially to do something like this, especially to do something like this, especially what I thought I'd be when I grew up. what I thought I'd be when I grew up. what I thought I'd be when I grew up. And so the fact that I even have the And so the fact that I even have the And so the fact that I even have the opportunity is such a blessing and and opportunity is such a blessing and and opportunity is such a blessing and and such a fortune. So very excited about such a fortune. So very excited about such a fortune. So very excited about the projects you're working on and the projects you're working on and the projects you're working on and >> so proud of you. I tell >> so proud of you. I tell >> so proud of you. I tell >> everyone navigating just your career >> everyone navigating just your career >> everyone navigating just your career um and maybe I'm saying this out of um and maybe I'm saying this out of um and maybe I'm saying this out of experience but we are living in an experience but we are living in an experience but we are living in an incredible time where you can actually incredible time where you can actually incredible time where you can actually think of the most insane idea and think of the most insane idea and think of the most insane idea and monetize it. monetize it. monetize it. >> Mhm. >> Mhm. >> Mhm. >> For everyone. This is not just like for >> For everyone. This is not just like for >> For everyone. This is not just like for me as an actor. In fact, it's limiting me as an actor. In fact, it's limiting me as an actor. In fact, it's limiting for me as an actor, for me as an actor, for me as an actor, >> but like you can, you know, go beyond >> but like you can, you know, go beyond >> but like you can, you know, go beyond the medium that you've been given. Like the medium that you've been given. Like the medium that you've been given. Like you could be a content creator, you you could be a content creator, you you could be a content creator, you could become a producer, you could write could become a producer, you could write could become a producer, you could write yourself a story and, you know, fund it. yourself a story and, you know, fund it. yourself a story and, you know, fund it. You could be enterprising. I tell every You could be enterprising. I tell every You could be enterprising. I tell every person who's navigating this person who's navigating this person who's navigating this everchanging world of of any um you know everchanging world of of any um you know everchanging world of of any um you know any business that you might be in with any business that you might be in with any business that you might be in with AI with AI with AI with >> there's so much change like be >> there's so much change like be >> there's so much change like be enterprising be an entrepreneur for enterprising be an entrepreneur for enterprising be an entrepreneur for yourself learn to sell yourself and your yourself learn to sell yourself and your yourself learn to sell yourself and your strengths strengths strengths >> and understand that you know the end >> and understand that you know the end >> and understand that you know the end goal might look really large like you goal might look really large like you goal might look really large like you know you're working with Netflix and know you're working with Netflix and know you're working with Netflix and you're producing you're producing you're producing TV shows like that's insane if you tell TV shows like that's insane if you tell TV shows like that's insane if you tell your 10-year-old self. your 10-year-old self. your 10-year-old self. >> Totally. Yeah. Even my 20-year-old self >> Totally. Yeah. Even my 20-year-old self >> Totally. Yeah. Even my 20-year-old self >> or even your 20-year-old self. But >> or even your 20-year-old self. But >> or even your 20-year-old self. But you're enterprising and you know your you're enterprising and you know your you're enterprising and you know your strengths and and that's just good strengths and and that's just good strengths and and that's just good business and business and business and >> to be able to be excited about the >> to be able to be excited about the >> to be able to be excited about the opportunity is very humble of you. I opportunity is very humble of you. I opportunity is very humble of you. I would like to applaud the fact that would like to applaud the fact that would like to applaud the fact that >> you've been able to build that road for >> you've been able to build that road for >> you've been able to build that road for yourself and you've been enterprising yourself and you've been enterprising yourself and you've been enterprising for yourself and you know built yourself for yourself and you know built yourself for yourself and you know built yourself into such a strong business and into such a strong business and into such a strong business and >> that's just what I really encourage >> that's just what I really encourage >> that's just what I really encourage everyone to think like that for yourself everyone to think like that for yourself everyone to think like that for yourself >> you know and dreams just we're at a time >> you know and dreams just we're at a time >> you know and dreams just we're at a time where it's kind of magical. where it's kind of magical. where it's kind of magical. >> Absolutely. Well, it's it's people like >> Absolutely. Well, it's it's people like >> Absolutely. Well, it's it's people like yourself and even the story you shared yourself and even the story you shared yourself and even the story you shared today about pivots that may not even be today about pivots that may not even be today about pivots that may not even be the end point. it may not even be the the end point. it may not even be the the end point. it may not even be the direction. People like yourself, I think direction. People like yourself, I think direction. People like yourself, I think it's really inspiring when you're at the it's really inspiring when you're at the it's really inspiring when you're at the top of your game. You can pivot, try top of your game. You can pivot, try top of your game. You can pivot, try something, go, "No, this isn't me." And something, go, "No, this isn't me." And something, go, "No, this isn't me." And then move again and win. And it's like then move again and win. And it's like then move again and win. And it's like that I think watching people do that, that I think watching people do that, that I think watching people do that, people like yourself, I think have set people like yourself, I think have set people like yourself, I think have set such a great example for everyone to not such a great example for everyone to not such a great example for everyone to not and and everyone around you will tell and and everyone around you will tell and and everyone around you will tell you the opposite, by the way. Like when you the opposite, by the way. Like when you the opposite, by the way. Like when I wanted to start doing this, everyone I wanted to start doing this, everyone I wanted to start doing this, everyone was like, "Jay, like you know your lane. was like, "Jay, like you know your lane. was like, "Jay, like you know your lane. Like just do your thing. Like know your Like just do your thing. Like know your Like just do your thing. Like know your lane." And I was just like, well, what lane." And I was just like, well, what lane." And I was just like, well, what is my lane? Like, I didn't know this is my lane? Like, I didn't know this is my lane? Like, I didn't know this existed 10 years ago. It's the worst existed 10 years ago. It's the worst existed 10 years ago. It's the worst advice. Never stay in your lane. advice. Never stay in your lane. advice. Never stay in your lane. >> That's like the worst advice because >> That's like the worst advice because >> That's like the worst advice because everyone is running so hard to find a everyone is running so hard to find a everyone is running so hard to find a lane. lane. lane. >> Like when you have something that's >> Like when you have something that's >> Like when you have something that's unique, which you do about yourself, you unique, which you do about yourself, you unique, which you do about yourself, you can pivot that into anything. Creativity can pivot that into anything. Creativity can pivot that into anything. Creativity is not limited to like a book. If you're is not limited to like a book. If you're is not limited to like a book. If you're a writer, you could write a screenplay. a writer, you could write a screenplay. a writer, you could write a screenplay. >> Yeah, totally. >> Yeah, totally. >> Yeah, totally. >> You could write a script. Yeah, >> You could write a script. Yeah, >> You could write a script. Yeah, >> you could turn that writing and [snorts] >> you could turn that writing and [snorts] >> you could turn that writing and [snorts] problem solving skill set into problem solving skill set into problem solving skill set into production. production. production. >> You could turn production into direct. >> You could turn production into direct. >> You could turn production into direct. Like it could I I'm just talking about Like it could I I'm just talking about Like it could I I'm just talking about my field because I just know my field. my field because I just know my field. my field because I just know my field. >> But you know, even being able to pivot >> But you know, even being able to pivot >> But you know, even being able to pivot and navigate within and navigate within and navigate within >> the industry or the medium that you know >> the industry or the medium that you know >> the industry or the medium that you know is is really cool to open your mind up is is really cool to open your mind up is is really cool to open your mind up for that. Never ever actually stay in for that. Never ever actually stay in for that. Never ever actually stay in your lane. your lane. your lane. >> Yeah. Well, you've you've set the >> Yeah. Well, you've you've set the >> Yeah. Well, you've you've set the standard and you've paved the way and standard and you've paved the way and standard and you've paved the way and shown a great example. So, shown a great example. So, shown a great example. So, >> thank you. >> thank you. >> thank you. >> Happy to get your mentorship and >> Happy to get your mentorship and >> Happy to get your mentorship and guidance and [clears throat] and all the guidance and [clears throat] and all the guidance and [clears throat] and all the steer and insights you have for me for steer and insights you have for me for steer and insights you have for me for sure. I'm so excited for you. Thank you. sure. I'm so excited for you. Thank you. sure. I'm so excited for you. Thank you. >> I can't wait to hear more about it. >> I can't wait to hear more about it. >> I can't wait to hear more about it. >> You're so sweet. >> You're so sweet. >> You're so sweet. >> If you're feeling inspired by this >> If you're feeling inspired by this >> If you're feeling inspired by this episode, you won't want to miss my episode, you won't want to miss my episode, you won't want to miss my conversation with Wicked's Cynthia conversation with Wicked's Cynthia conversation with Wicked's Cynthia Arivo. Arivo. Arivo. >> We are afraid to let a person go, and we >> We are afraid to let a person go, and we >> We are afraid to let a person go, and we need to be okay with letting people go. need to be okay with letting people go. need to be okay with letting people go. We don't know what path people are We don't know what path people are We don't know what path people are walking on when they walk into our walking on when they walk into our walking on when they walk into our lives.