Excellent Advice For Living: 79 Maxims from a Wise Old Man
Kevin Kelly's collection of 450 life lessons emphasizes a counterintuitive truth: enthusiasm matters more than intelligence, and being kind beats being right every time. The single most actionable insight: separate creation from editing—when you invent, don't judge; when you sketch, don't inspect. T
37mKey Takeaway
Kevin Kelly's collection of 450 life lessons emphasizes a counterintuitive truth: enthusiasm matters more than intelligence, and being kind beats being right every time. The single most actionable insight: separate creation from editing—when you invent, don't judge; when you sketch, don't inspect. The creator mind must be unleashed from judgment at the start. This applies to work, relationships, and personal growth.
Episode Overview
This episode explores Kevin Kelly's book 'Excellent Advice for Living,' featuring 450 compact pieces of wisdom distilled from timeless knowledge and personal experience. Kelly covers essential life principles across relationships, work, habits, creativity, and personal growth. The advice spans practical interpersonal skills (like asking 'is there more?' until there's nothing left), productivity principles (deadlines force different over perfect), and philosophical insights (forgiveness is a gift to ourselves, not others). A central theme emerges: most wisdom comes down to understanding others' perspectives, maintaining habits over seeking inspiration, and playing infinite games in your own unique way.
Key Insights
Enthusiasm Trumps Intelligence
Being enthusiastic is worth 25 IQ points. Your energy and passion for what you're doing often matters more than raw intelligence or credentials. This enthusiasm is contagious and opens doors that intelligence alone cannot.
Deadlines Drive Differentiation
Always demand a deadline because it weeds out the extraneous and ordinary. A deadline prevents you from trying to make it perfect, forcing you to make it different instead. Different is better than perfect. This principle appears in the creative processes of Christopher Nolan and Pixar's Ed Catmull.
Separate Creation from Judgment
You can't write and edit, sculpt and polish, or make and analyze at the same time. While you invent, don't select. While you sketch, don't inspect. The creator mind must be unleashed from judgment. This protects fragile new ideas that need nurturing before they can withstand criticism.
Habits Remove Self-Negotiation
The purpose of a habit is to remove that action from self-negotiation. You no longer expend energy deciding whether to do it—you just do it. Don't focus on getting into shape; focus on becoming the kind of person who never misses a workout. Habits are ropes we spin daily until they're too thick to break.
Understand What 'Yes' Means for Others
The best way to get to a yes in negotiation is to truly understand what yes means for the other party. This principle extends beyond formal negotiations—looking at situations from others' perspectives is fundamental to relationships, work, and conflict resolution.
Don't Be the Best, Be the Only
Instead of competing to be the best at something, aim to be the only one doing it your way. This creates a unique position that's impossible to compete with directly and allows you to play an infinite game on your own terms.
Change Behavior to Change Thinking
It is much easier to change how you think by changing your behavior than to change your behavior by changing how you think. Act out the change you seek. This reverses the typical approach—instead of trying to convince yourself mentally, take the physical action first and let your thinking follow.
The Rule of Three in Conversation
To get to the real reason, ask a person to go deeper than what they just said, then again, and once more. The third answer is closest to the truth. This applies to understanding yourself and others at a deeper level.
Notable Quotes
"Being enthusiastic is worth 25 IQ points."
"Always demand a deadline because it weeds out the extraneous and the ordinary. A deadline prevents you from trying to make it perfect. So you have to make it different. Different is better."
"Don't be the best. Be the only."
"Separate the process of creating from improving. You can't write and edit or sculpt and polish or make and analyze at the same time. If you do, the editor stops the creator."
"It is much easier to change how you think by changing your behavior than it is to change your behavior by changing how you think. Act out the change that you seek."
Action Items
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1
Practice the 'Is There More?' Technique
When listening to someone you love or a colleague, keep asking 'is there more?' until there is no more. This helps you understand their true perspective and builds deeper connections.
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2
Apply the Tomorrow Test to Commitments
When invited to do something in the future, ask yourself: 'Would I do this tomorrow?' Not many promises will pass that immediacy filter. This protects your time and energy for what truly matters.
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3
Separate Your Creation and Editing Phases
When working on any creative project, completely separate the creation phase from the editing phase. While inventing, don't judge. While sketching, don't inspect. Give yourself permission to create freely without the editor stopping you.
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4
Write Down One Thing You're Grateful For Daily
Practice gratitude daily by writing down one thing you're grateful for each day. This is the cheapest possible therapy and gets better with practice like a daily prayer.